IDEA: Hats for your drinking glasses
MOTIVATION: Have you ever poured a coke into a glass, enjoyed the carbony goodness of it all, only for it to go flat on you 10 minutes later?
METHOD: With hats on your drinking glasses, the carbonation has nowhere to escape to, keeping global CO2 emissions temporarily down so that you can absorb them directly into your gut and then fart them out later, essentially offsetting your carbon footprint with time.
WORK REQUIRED: The carbon entrapment device has been fully developed as rollable latex sock that can slide easily onto any glass. We still need to work out how to let the liquid pass through the latex and into people's mouths without gagging. A hay or straw-like tube might be neccesary to puncture through the latex, but this tube may also require a hat
CAPITAL REQUIRED: $ 10 million in upfront costs for purchasing alcoholic and carbonated beverages, latex condiments, and the services of attractive women. $ 20 million for later costs from the resulting lawsuits.
Im about your weight, but a whole pizza is usually enough. More than enough if I wash it down with coke