Suicidal ideation comes and goes, much like all the rest ๐คท๐ปโโ๏ธ
I don't think I said anything about it being ok for one sex to die if the other doesn't have to suffer, though? Not sure where that came from at all. Just pointing out that your view of "better living and in pain than dead" doesn't take into account the very different experience of fem-coded chronic disease sufferers. Men are more likely to be believed, more likely to receive quick and accurate diagnosis, more likely to receive appropriate support. Women and other minorities often are disbelieved, told they're imagining things, expected to suffer in silence, or outright told that they are lying for sympathy/attention/drugs. It's a lot harder to want to stay alive in spite of the pain when you don't receive proper support from family, friends, and medical institutions. The goal, obviously, is for everyone to receive the appropriate support. And before anyone jumps down my throat: not all men are lucky enough to have a perfect experience. Not all women and minorities have bad experiences. Yeah, we all know that. But the numbers are there and they speak for themselves.
As to the last point, the other commenter is correct; the divorce rate when the man has a chronic or terminal illness is 3%. In the reverse situation, with the woman being ill, the divorce rate is a whopping 21%. This is what I was referring to. Men are wildly disproportionately more likely to leave a spouse who is suffering from a chronic disease. Again, it's hard to want to live when the person who was supposed to be with you for better or worse decides you're too much trouble to deal with, and this is a thing that affects women far more than men. That's all I meant. I am certainly aware that support needs to go both ways even when one partner is chronically ill and I am lucky enough to have a supportive spouse who has their own (mental) health issues which lends itself to mutual support anyway.
Edit, I've just noticed you're not the person I initially responded to. That said, this is all directly in response to their belief that living with chronic health issues is always preferable to dying, so that that as you will.
Thanks for being open minded about it. I am passionate about it, as I've had several femme/minority friends be much worse off than I and struggle greatly with their conditions, and have lost a few as a result. I've also experienced firsthand the disparity in treatment, though I've been luckier than many with a comparatively "mild" condition and a robust support system. I don't disagree that there are problems in the system for every chronic patient, regardless of their sex, gender, race, etc and every loss is sad. I just get frustrated when people are flippant about the reality that many of us face - "well, at least you're alive" is of no comfort when death may feel like the only chance at peace.
Thanks for the discussion, regardless, and I wish you as many years of happiness and relatively pain-free enjoyment as you are able and wish to find. It's certainly not a competition out here, we should all be trying to advocate for all of us :)