That's not true: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_suicide_crisis_lines
It's like dozens of pages of free numbers. Pick one that suits your needs. And they're not all just for absolute emergencies... Or call a friend, a relative... They might know you and have an outside perspective on you and your situation.
Sure. I think you maybe dug yourself a comfortable hole. And now you to refuse to come out.
The question is: Now what? Do you want to be a downer? Do you not want to be a downer?
Btw, and I don't quite get if you're comfortable where you are, or whether you aren't. You post here regularly. You don't have a drivers license, you gave up staying in shape, you gave up practicing an instrument... You gave up on women... You want advice but you don't want advice... I'm not sure what to make of this. Like if you want to become someone else, go ahead. Pick up the things you mentioned and actually do it.
And another word of unsolicited advice: People who are just 'downers' aren't attractive. If you want someone to be interested in you, you gotta at least have something that's interesting about you. Or be funny or at least be nice and not overly negative around people you'd like to meet again. And people who don't care about anything also aren't attractive.
Not everything is about looks. Not even close. But you gotta choose what character traits to display around people. And what you can bring to the table.
If it's nothing, and you're not even genuinely interested in a relationship... you just want one... I know why you fail.
Finish your driver's license, decide who you want to be and find something that you can tell women you like. And be genuine. People can tell if you lie. It needs to be something you're really interested in. And then do it. F*ing force yourself to become the person you'd like to be. Make small steps and don't give up.
Talk with friends. Get some support and/or sympathy.
Sure. I took "the blockchain" to mean bitcoin. It certainly depends on the implemetation. And on the use-case. In recent years people have put blockchain into everything. But that's not useful either. There are different kinds of blockchain, some more or less useful to certain tasks. And there are applications where blockchains aren't useful at all. so generally it depends on the specific problem we're trying to solve.
[Disclaimer: I'm not a professional and this is just my (uneducated) opinion.]
That's a bit unfortunate but understandable. We all have things we want, it's subjective and you're as entitled to be happy and get what you want, as anybody else... Unfortunately the universe doesn't exactly 'owe' that to us.
In that case I'm not sure what I'd like to advise you. It's kind if a bummer and maybe I can sympathise. And both of your problems are big ones and not something that gets solved over night. Generally there are two options: Give up or don't give up. The first thing isn't really an option and the second requires you to put in some effort and try to change things around. Sometimes it's really hard to get what you want and you fail over and over in the process. That's not unique to your situation. But I think I can empathize how it feels if you already tried that and always failed.
On the flipside, I don't know your exact situation. But it seems you're quite down. You write you're 34. I think that's a common time to get a mid-life crisis. To reconsider your life 'cause now you're not young anymore and you have to consider how to finally achieve things that life didn't grant you until then. That's not your fault.
I think it's hard to get out of that. But I'd like to encourage you to think over with a broader perspective. It's now that you're not seeing any way out. That's not necessarily true but it's how you feel now. You somehow need to dig yourself out of that. You owe that to your future you, in case there is the slightest possibility that there is a way, you just don't see it now. You fail until you don't. And there is no way to know in advace how many more times you have to fail.
Get professional help. Call one of the helplines and just talk to them. They're more skilled than internet strangers and they have some contacts they can connect you with. Maybe you need a doctor, I don't really know.
As of now I think you need some coping strategy to get into a position where you're able to do something (again) and not just feel down and dwell in that. I know that's easier said then done...
I mean isn't there something you're interested in aside from the stereotypical women, family and a nice job? Maybe you can find something that is fulfilling to you specifically? Idk, working out and getting in shape, learning something maybe coding, history or some (niche) fandom. You could build something, take pride in gardening or do artsy stuff and maybe sell it on Tindie. Write stories...
That'd help if you're not like all the other people and you're just following the beaten path, but it's just not for you. In that case you'd need to explore what is right for you. That's certainly not easy.
Other possibilities include: You've in fact lost that game. Or you have some sort of mental illness like depression or a mid-life crisis and need treatment for it to get better.
Interestingly enough, that doesn't happen in some communities like !Technology@beehaw.org and I thought that wouldn't happen in communities that are dedicated to AI. Well, maybe I'm wrong and lots of people don't understand the concept of communities. Yeah, but I nowadays also see lots of AI stuff in the general communities like Ask Lemmy.
Well if they properly embraced it, you wouldn't get one PGP key implanted at birth. I mean if that private key ever leaks, you're screwed for the rest of your life. And the blockchain has sever shortcomings, too. It's not anonymous, everyone can see every transaction and it's not fast enough for lots of applications.
It'd need to be implemented properly. And most importantly include privacy. You can't just expose millions of people to every attacker. And please think of the not obvious cases... How someone operate it who's in the hospital and unconscious... What if you lost your phone... How can you keep secrets from your (abusive) partner... What about separation of state and private companies... How to prevent a scifi dystopia...
I think if like a few hundred millions of people are subject to it, it needs to be done properly. And I think that'd be possible if the government payed some experts to come up with a really good solution.
Keys need to have sub-keys, IDs be randomized, there needs to be some human in the loop in case something goes wrong. Attestation and not just giving out everything to every company...
I don't think art works if you just do it for a reason like encourage others to post more. Do it for yourself. I think that works better.
You should als mention the country. Helps if you're a business and not just looking for the cheapest. And maybe get a all-in-one solution if you don't want to set up and maintain mail yourself.
hetzner.de uberspace.de all-inkl.com netcup.de inwx.de are some I use or used.
Hehe. I don't think English is that broken. I mean it's definitely broken. But still one of the easier languages to learn. It's my second language, so my perspective might be a bit different. But I also had French in school. And oh my, that's a proper hassle to memorize all the articles, specifics and numerous exceptions to every rule there is... English was way easier (for me.)