quadrotiles

Oh no, I didn't even think about the possibility of power hungry mods lol

Communities splintering is going to be such a headache, and it's definitely going to happen. I get why people would want to make an instance private-ish by defederating, but the fact that people can still post but not see everything in different versions of the same instance - in my own opinion - kind of a stupid/stressful way of doing it. I feel like, if it's defederated, people who aren't signed up on that instance shouldn't be able to post. I feel like that would be so much more intuitive than creating diverging versions of almost the same thing. I could be wrong though, and we'll just have to see how it goes.

I also don't spend much time in the German speaking part of the internet (it would be funny if it were because I don't speak German, but I do lol)

I'm curious about what your reasons are, if you don't mind sharing?

I think I sort of understand in theory how instances and the communities work, but I am confused about how it works in practice. I'll hopefully figure it out in time. I signed up via reddthat, so as long as they stay federated... I should still be able to see everything and do everything and have my comments be seen by everyone? Right?

I signed my mum up for Reddit 6 years ago and she's a daily user of that (lmao I help her with subreddits and try to help her not fall into weird rabbit holes, but over all she just looks at cat pictures and fun things) but I don't think she'd manage Lemmy. Maybe, if there were already more communities and more posts related to her interests, and I set Lemmy up for her, and nothing ever changed about how she would learn to use Lemmy. But I think just the nature of Lemmy - it's too new and the idea of instances and how they are federated is too confusing for now. Or maybe I just need to understand it better myself.

Now that I reread my own comment and read yours, I actually realise it was more than a few months of torment. It was a few months of figuring out my identity (which wouldn't have been an existential crisis if it hadn't been for the toxic relationship) and then a further 5 years of a toxic relationship after that. I'm glad I got out, but it sucks to bump into mutual friends who didn't realise we were together in the past call my ex "the nicest person you'll ever meet".

Basking in the reflected edginess of queerness is also a perfect description of an element my past relationship. I've never heard it put quite so well lol

I'm also very glad you're out of that toxic relationship. That sounds so gross and I hope you're in a more loving and supportive place now.

I had a few months of existential crisis when I was 21, but it was more related to a manipulative partner who was fetishising my queer identity as I was just figuring out who I was.

I'm lucky enough that I never felt not-normal and I've never felt the need to "come out" because I've never been in the closet to begin with. But I recognise what a huge privilege that is and I have been working hard on myself and my surroundings to try extend even some of that privilege to others.

(Eg I'm actively campaigning for change at my work place, which also has a wide reach to the public in the country I live in)

I move little icons around, press little square buttons and the higher-ups are happy