confusedpuppy

joined 2 years ago

As with many travelers in Australia, we both had work/holiday visa's that allowed us to stay in Australia for 1-2 years. This wonderful comment was thrown at me within the first week of arriving at a hostel in Sydney.

Fortunately they left a month or two later but I still avoided them when they did still live there.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Amazing. Layers of ignorance for an already dumb thing to say.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 32 points 1 year ago (6 children)

I'm a person of colour who has a white step parent and has grown up in Canada in a fairly mixed area.

My family history would have started in India but my parents were born in South America and migrated up to North America (both Canada and the US) where my sister and I were born. I grew up "white." My voice, appearance and behaviour are "white." I was born and raised Canadian. I'm far from proud of this country where I have spent my life but I will identify myself as a Canadian. My family history had been thoroughly white washed and erased.

I say all this because for all this history I have behind me, it means nothing to most people.

The majority of Indian people here will look at me one way until I speak and then promptly ignore me because I'm not "Indian."

West Indian people want to be my best friend until they find out I've never visited any West Indian country. Then I'll be treated as an idiot for not embracing a culture I have no real knowledge of and have not been immersed in.

Then there are the white people... No matter how white I act, I will never be "white" enough. I'll always be the colour of my skin. I could look, act and behave as awful as a white cop and still not be on the same level.

In fact, I have a "friend" who is a cop. He's not really my friend, more of an acquaintance I've known for 10+ years through another more decent friend. This guy is just fucking awful and every molecule in his body is racist and vile. He looks at me, arms full of tattoos and tells me I'd be a perfect "UC." Undercover Cop. My only value to him is to be used to incriminate fellow people of colour. I'm just not a person or anything close to equal. Always something less.

I've never really had a place where I felt I belonged while growing up. Hated for being me from multiple angles for reasons beyond my control while doing nothing harmful to anyone. There are good people out there who treat me as a person first but they are few and far between.

Another quick story, I once had a Dutch guy in Australia tell me that his last name Hoffmeister means "House Master." You know, from the times when they used to own slaves. Thanks for telling me that to my face, you absolute weirdo.

I love Robins. They are brave little birds who love to hop/fly slightly ahead of you so they can stare you down. They give off a "Keep walking this way and you gon' get stabbed" vibe. It's an all bark no bite situation, so you're not actually in any real danger.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 9 points 1 year ago (2 children)

Judging from the stories of autistic women who are in my life, as well as stories I've read online, there seems to also be the issue of being heard or taken seriously when attempting to get diagnosed or treated. This is on top of societal or gendered expectations which makes masking that much more of a challenge to maintain.

One of my closest friends had to stop seeing their therapist because she would leave her sessions crying and was only able to improve her mental health by refusing to visit that therapist again. Another really close friend had a doctor that kept prescribing the same medication to her even after stating multiple times at multiple visits that the medication was causing her suicidal thoughts.

In comparison, as a male myself, I was able to walk in, tell them why I thought I had ADHD and later autism and was able to walk about with prescriptions or a plan of action within the same visit.

I do think the the video spoke broadly enough that it could be informative about autism in general and could have added a bit more context to align the title with the video content.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

After finally getting fed up, I went on a 10 month campaign against mamagement calling out all the sexism, racism, poor management and absolute disrespectful treatment of apprentices and contractors. I made it very clear that the work culture was awful in every way.

I got predictably fired but I secretly was working with corporate to deal with the the awful HR manager who was enabling this work culture.

Without going into much details, After my company fired me, I put in a complaint to the government labour board over a wrongful termination case. A month later after my submitting my case to the labour board, the HR manager was forced into early retirement. A month after that I settled out of court and got my severance plus a little extra to cover lawyer fees.

My coworkers knew, most got upset at me for challenging authority, some respectfully supported me at an arms length and even fewer people actually supported me.

What was undercover hate wasn't very hidden by the end of my time there. Although I doubt they fully knew how much I couldn't stand them. I still had to maintain the peace somehow.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 24 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I used to work in the trades. I was surrounded by straight-acting men. There's nothing more gay than a group of straight-acting men.

Unfortunately it's the creepy, repressed kind of gay that would make a tolerate person's skin crawl.

I feel awful for their wives and children.

I've been playing a lot of Caves of Qud recently and it has an interesting mechanic that I think is absolutely great for newer players.

You are offered to start a classic game which is the standard one life, perma-death you expect from a rogue-like game. Or you can choose the Roleplay game where you can make a checkpoint at the last settlement you visited. This means that if you die on an outting, you will roll back to the last time you visited a settlement without losing all your progress.

This could be easily be implemented into Pixel Dungeon since every new zone has a trader which could act as a checkpoint.

This allows for the feeling of progress and also allows newer players to experience and learn the deeper zones and levels of the game without the risk of losing everything and starting over after every death.

I'm a huge fan of this since Caves of Qud is such a deeply complex game and there's so much to learn and explore.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 21 points 1 year ago (11 children)

I always find it interesting when someone states they don't enjoy an activity and one of the first responses are to subtly guilt the commenter for not enjoying an activity.

I've been losing interest in movies for the past 15-20 years and being guilted into enjoy something I no longer enjoy for someone else's expense does not sound like fun.

Fortunately there are plenty of activities to do together. As you mentioned, cooking together sounds great to me. So does walking in nature. I especially love playing music for each other because I love hearing what other people listen to.

Humans are wonderfully complex and there's plenty in the world to for us to enjoy.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 23 points 1 year ago (1 children)

A long time ago I came across a game that was part of a 1mb challenge. It's called A New Zero. I played it quite a lot, just flying around and dive bombing boats was entertaining enough for me.

I was impressed with 1mb but 13kb and 96kb is pretty amazing. I really enjoy seeing stuff like this.

[–] confusedpuppy@lemmy.dbzer0.com 35 points 1 year ago (12 children)

Many people get annoyed that I often give vague answers. If I over explain myself, they'll twist my words into a new meaning. I'm confused :D

I've had stocks in a couple forms over my lifetime and after a while, both times I have pulled all my money out.

The first time was shortly after the 2008 crash. All those reassuring words my investing manager person told me were simply sweet nothings. I decided that taking the hit of losing half my money was a life lesson and used the remaining half to go travel and live a life for myself. That investing manager later went on to have a covid party out of defiance for masking requirements, caught covid and died. Felt good knowing my stranger-danger alarms were working even if I didn't understand my decisions fully at the time.

The second time I simply put my money into a low risk, government stock option for a few years. After watching global leaders fumble the handling of a global pandemic, I lost faith my own government to have my best interest in mind. I pulled my money out again.

I personally feel super uncomfortable allowing other people to make money off my money that I am risking. Even if it is low risk. It make me feel exploited.

Ultimately, I decided I don't need my money to work for me because I don't even want to work. I hate the concept of money. To me, money just disconnects us from community and nature.

If you are curious to how I live, it's with very little. I spent a number of years of my life living out of a 34 liter sized backpack. Living minimally while making sure what I owned had meaning, purpose or intention transfered over to when I finally started settling into a certain location.

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