I don't use the docker labels feature so it doesn't really matter to me but can see why you would want this to be implemented if you did. Hopefully they can figure it out.
I have a "local" version with every prod service on. It's only accessible on my home network with a pihole dns resolver. I just add the services manually to the services.yaml file, which doesn't take long at all. I then have a "remote" version which is a much smaller with only services accessible outside my home network and is behind nginx/authentication software/cloudflare. Again, it doesn't take long to add services really. Two different docker compose files, volumes with the settings, and ports makes it work fine for me. I guess depends how often you're adding services.
Before you go too far into it and spend lots of time, I think most VPS services let you installed a new OS on their admin site so you can start again from scratch. If you're not sure that is the right linux flavour, go for something else more mainstream so you can find lots of support online. Looking at the OS, I'm sure it might be good but I'm also sure you can install all the features very easily yourself, especially if it's just using docker mainly.
I second UFW. I found this guide useful: https://www.digitalocean.com/community/tutorials/ufw-essentials-common-firewall-rules-and-commands. You might want to try tailscale as others use it for easily setting up vpn access but not used it myself. Also go for fail2ban or, for more assurance but harder work, try crowdsec too.
You could also use cloudflare dns and add IP and/or country restrictions to block all traffic before it gets to your VPS. I have a country filter and it's crazy how many bots get blocked from all over!