Amazing that a small gesture like putting his hand over his heart was enough to impact you like this. You are probably very empathetic. Hopefully this inspires you to reach out the next time you see a gesture like this and your conscience brings up this old memory.
Thanks for sharing
Go to bed Thor Ragnarok! I don’t care if The Mummy is farting up the room — it’s taco Tuesday, what did you expect?!
I recommend the Super Meat Boy soundtrack. Danny Baranowsky is a genius of bops.
That is so kind of you to say
This is such a good question that it’s kind of blowing my mind.
First off, it’s actually a shit message to only include “my shawarma fell apart” with no other context. There’s not even punctuation! Like, give me some textual non-verbals I can pick up on.
Second, this is so typical of neuro-normies: send a message with no social cues and somehow expect the recipient to ace the response.
So what’s the ideal response? I dunno. I’d probably reply with something like “I know, right?! My butthole is so itchy right now. Could this day be any worse?”
Isn’t Russia supposed to be invading Ukraine because Ukrainians are nazis…?
“Putin: I want to beat up nazis. Putin’s mom: We have nazis at home.”
In short: a local bacteria caused blood poisoning.
A large herd of antelope died of a similar cause shortly before this group of elephants succumbed to the sickness as well.
So glad you said something
I thought they were toasting a freestanding bottle in honor of a fallen lad or something. Never suspected there had an SAS sniper there with them
Dang Scotland, you scary
About 10 years of marriage and your situation reads just like one of mine that started a few months back. I’ve even been through the same frantic spiral you described with the condoms.
I haven’t figured it out fully yet, but here are the things I’ve found have helped:
Checked out the book “Insecure in Love” by Leslie Becker-Phelps. My feelings of jealousy almost definitely stem from my insecure attachment and I needed to recognize when that fear was being activated so I could practice responding better.
Therapy with EMDR - turns out my family of origin was kinda effed up and that was bleeding over into my beliefs about relationships. It can be fixed with therapy (but you may need to shop around for a therapist that fits you — it takes time and that’d okay because you learn something useful from every therapist you try). This gave me the tools to fight when those anxiety attacks came around.
Getting my own friend group - I was like you and really didn’t NEED or WANT other friends besides my SO. That said, I took the past 6 months or so to try and branch out and I can’t tell you how great it is to have someone to call when those negative feelings hit who can talk you off the ledge (or, to my surprise, let me know that they have also had these feelings, but that it doesn’t mean anything). Being there to support someone else as they go through life is also incredibly rewarding.
Prayer. I’m a person of faith, and I believe prayer has helped calm me down and surrender as well as look at the situation through fresh eyes.
Journaling - getting into the habit of writing down your thoughts in a secure location was huge for me getting to work out those “intuitions” that were causing me some anxiety. I always thought I was an intuitive person, so when I had an intuition that led me wrong, I needed to process it.
I hope some of this helps because I know the anxiety sucks. I don’t think it will get better on its own, so if you want to stay in this relationship (and for the sake of your future relationships), decide to do the work and make moves to do it. It’s not your fault, but sometimes life shits on us and we have to go clean up the shit so it doesn’t stink so much.