From our perspective, we'll never know if we are predestined or not, so it's functionally the same thing as free will. On the other hand, to the extent that we may have that, we would need to bow to His will, not force forward our own, as in if He wants a mountain to move, then we can pray and it will, but if He did not, then no amount of asking would work.
The big problem is that the word "loneliness" can mean so many different things. For some people it's touch or attention, for both of which a pet would help. For others it's sex and there masturbation could aid though some religious people think otherwise leading people to avoid it. I mean, feelings of "loneliness" could even be impacted by making healthy food for yourself? Or it might be as simple as going outside more, to recharge vitamins naturally (or at least that being a contributing factor).
So it was worth a shot. Therapy would help disambiguate what's going on. Obviously having a friend could help too, though that is a more long-term thing especially if you suck at irl human interaction - which gaming and talking on Reddit (more so there but not entirely absent here - we can be toxic AF) can work against by reinforcing habits online that will turn people away irl.
You do not owe me - an explanation or anything else. You stand before God and yourself, not me.
As for trolling, the best resource I've ever seen by far is The Alt-Right Playbook by Innuendo Studios. He's an avid atheist, which is not relevant in the slightest even for discussing trolling on religious topics. Though I will add that a lot of atheists seem to see more clearly than the vast majority of "christians" I have ever met. As Jesus said: "But you are only warm—not hot, not cold. So I am ready to spit (vomit) you out of my mouth." (Revelation 3:15) And as CS Lewis said, you have to have a certain amount of character - either good or evil - before you can be truly called either of those things. i.e., someone who shows up to services on Sundays ready for a good hour-long nap is not following Christ, though oddly an atheist who opens their eyes to the foundational principles of the world (see e.g. Romans 1:20) is closer to that than such a "christian". The former abuses the word "God" while denying its power - thereby telling lies (that they "love" Him, that they "follow" Him, etc.) - while the other tells the truth as they yet see it in part, that there is no god (that they can see). Anyway don't let that hold you back from learning from him, if he can see more clearly in this arena - I definitely learned a lot from watching that series:-).
Romans 9:22 gives one possible answer to that:
What if God, desiring to show his wrath and to make known his power, has endured with much patience vessels of wrath prepared for destruction,
Like an author who makes both villains and heroes, and normies too I suppose... maybe, for the sake of the particular flavor of spice that they choose.
And Hebrews 10 also tells a bit of the story: God offers the entire world His son, and refusing that just might leave someone hopeless. Like an infant who died at birth, it's sad but you don't keep it in the house, give it the room and perhaps even college fund that you prepared in advance for it. It's not its' fault, but it's dead so... you put it outside like trash (special trash, with a ceremony, but not like a "family member", who gets to stay inside the house and be fed and can play with toys and such).
Setting blame aside, something either produces fruit or it doesn't, period. When you turn on your computer, you expect it to work, not ignore you, and if it doesn't, then after all the attempts to fix it yield no results, you throw it out and get a new one that will. All this is what we already do, here and now. Whatever He does... could very well be similar? Or not, but I have no problems with the idea that he would let some ~~computer programs~~ ~~fictional characters~~ human beings be discarded forever. The creator gets to decide, it has nothing to do with "fair", it's just what is.
But honestly I have no idea, beyond that it's possible:-).
Joke answer: this is the Fediverse... we don't!
Real answer: consider a pet, like if you are an indoor person (you said gaming) then perhaps a cat?
The hardest part of all is learning to accept and thereby being able to live with yourself. That will take some therapy - by which I mean effort and time, maybe money if you have it - and is so worth it, bc our parents fucked us up something fierce.
But in the meantime, a pet will love you forever if you treat it right.
This is the Fediverse.
i.e., it is always implied (btw) :-P
Another beautiful poem about it, more specifically against everything that ~~religious Karens~~ conservatives stand for:
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
1 Corinthians 13
Looking at the hate and anger that they spew... how can anyone remain convinced that they are about "Christianity" aka love?
The difference is, Kid Rock did it on purpose:-).
If you'll take a word offered in the spirit of kindness - this, this right here is where you lost this conversation. The goal should not be so much to "win", as to truly win. By your own admission, you cannot save anyone, hence you are not responsible for even trying, only for representing what your faith has done in your own life.
And calling the other person a troll - even (especially) if they are one - cements their attitude against you. Then further calling their understanding as "preposterous"... well, you get the idea.
Do whatever you want, but I thought I'd offer that thought at least.
The older I get, the more dangerous I see Calvinism as being. Mind you, I believe it is true, but I see why it is difficult to explain. The child-like laws, given to literal children, seem to me to be a way of gently guiding people into the deeper waters. Unfortunately some people refuse to ever grow up, not just in Christianity but in every single aspect of life. It is so much easier to just play make-believe and spare people's feelings (namely, probably the people doing that are attempting to spare their own). We are wounded, due to the effects of sin, and then for lack of knowledge the people perish.
Studies in chimpanzees reveal that they do the same thing. It's not even just "human nature", it's nature itself, pure and simple.
We should ride above that. We won't, but we should.:-)
He may not, but Janeway could teach ~~Tuvix~~ Darth Spock a few things about the dark side...