MHLoppy

"We, the signatories listed below, come together with a simple, urgent message: the war in Gaza must end now," the statement said.

In short:

Australia has joined the United Kingdom, France and other countries in demanding an immediate end to the war in Gaza and for Israel to lift aid restrictions.

Israel says the statement is "disconnected from reality" and is urging countries to instead place pressure on Hamas.

What's next?

The 25 countries went on to urge other members of the international community to "unite in a common effort to bring this terrible conflict to an end".

ABC doesn't seem to have a link to the full statement, but I believe it's this: https://www.foreignminister.gov.au/minister/penny-wong/media-release/joint-statement-behalf-26-partners-occupied-palestinian-territories

This statement has been signed by:

• The Foreign Ministers of Australia, Austria, Belgium, Canada, Denmark, Estonia, Finland, France, Iceland, Ireland, Italy, Japan, Latvia, Lithuania, Luxembourg, The Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Poland, Portugal, Slovenia, Spain, Sweden, Switzerland and the UK
• The EU Commissioner for Equality, Preparedness and Crisis Management

Following a rigorous and exhaustive inquest, the Federal Bureau of Investigation has officially concluded that there is no war in Ba Sing Se, officials at the FBI confirmed Thursday.

“As part of our ongoing commitment to transparency, the Federal Bureau of Investigation has conducted an exhaustive review of investigative holdings related to the alleged war in the four nations,” said FBI Director Kash Patel. “It was a long and arduous process, but we are very thankful to have had the cooperation of a local intelligence agency known as the Dai Li. After reviewing all of the facts and evidence available to us at this time, we are happy to report that the truth has been uncovered and there is, in fact, no war in Ba Sing Se.”

Earth Nation citizens, however, were quick to share their doubts regarding the FBI’s official verdict. We spoke with Kenji, a local zookeeper and activist in Ba Sing Se. [...]

Context for the non-political part: https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/there-is-no-war-in-ba-sing-se

Local piece of shit Jesse Schweitzer was charged with impersonating a police officer after assaulting his entrapped girlfriend Denise Soderstrom, confirmed sources.

“His form was that of a 15-year veteran officer during a routine traffic stop,” said Officer Grady, responding to the call from a worried neighbor. “It was almost like I was the one who had been hitting her repeatedly, which is our go-to method for deescalating any situation. As law enforcement, the domestic abuse we can excuse. But doing it like one of us while not having the legal authority behind you to act with impunity? We can’t just overlook that. This behavior calls for a stern slap on the wrist.” [...]

Who, Me?: 'This, many considered, was bad'

Here in the Weeky County area, we're gonna have a mild cold front moving through the downtown area this weekend, so if you're going to park, you might wanna bring a light jacket.

VShojo and Hololive have brought streamers like Ironmouse and Mori Calliope to mainstream audiences,

Media mogul and aspiring Bond villain Rupert Murdoch is demanding to know which international media propaganda machine got this deranged egotistical fuck elected as US President in the first place.

Sources close to the apparently still alive Murdoch say he was “mildly annoyed” when Donald Trump began undermining free elections, but has now become “fucking ropable” after learning the former President wants to hurt his bank account.

Trump has filed a defamation lawsuit against the Murdoch-owned Wall Street Journal for alleging Trump sent notorious paedophile Jeffrey Epstein a birthday card. [...]

A local man has survived an extravagant 3-day bucks party on Betoota’s luxurious outer atoll this weekend despite the party’s organiser failing to provide food. According to sources, the organisers spent the entire $800-per-person budget on accommodation and recreational substances.

Speaking with The Advocate shortly after returning to the mainland, Bryce Wittenhouse explains how it was out of sheer desperation that he managed to find the only nutrient source he believed available. [...]

Metalhead and total poser Greg Borneck had patches for bands that you recognized on his battle vest when you saw him in the crowd at an Exhumed show, disgusted sources report.

“Yeah man, I had a lot of fun putting this together,” Borneck said. “I grew up a huge Sepultura fan, so of course I had to put a ‘Beneath the Remains’ patch on there. I also figured I couldn’t go wrong with a Kreator ‘Pleasure to Kill’ backpatch, because that album is an absolute thrash masterpiece. I’ve also got a few death metal band patches on here, like Morbid Angel and Deicide. You know, just really classic stuff that any metalhead can get behind. I just love whipping this bad boy out to go to a show. It is usually quite the conversation starter, not to mention a scowl starter for some reason.” [...]

In what may be their first apology issued for the behavior of a Cabinet member, White House officials reportedly apologized to a foreign dignitary Tuesday after the man was bitten by a rabid Robert F. Kennedy Jr. “Sorry, sorry, that’s just our health secretary—I don’t know what’s gotten into him!” senior aide Tasha Sturbridge said as Kennedy snarled and sank his teeth deep into the leg of Japanese envoy Haruto Tanaka, with eyewitnesses reporting a mixture of blood and frothed saliva ringing the secretary’s mouth as his eyes rolled back in his head. [...]

Australia has done what it does best today, which is to throw its weight behind a flawed but familiar larrikin simply because he’s being sued by a bigger and worse cunt from overseas.

News broke this morning that US President Donald Trump has launched a $15 billion lawsuit against Rupert Murdoch over a Wall Street Journal article reporting on his alleged involvement in a bizarre birthday tribute to convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein.

While Murdoch has long been accused of corrupting global democracies, manufacturing moral panics and platforming people who would’ve been fed to bears for entertainment in the Middle Ages, the fact that Trump is now suing him has flipped the public’s view of “our Rupert.” [...]