Flickerby

My parents used to invite my ex fiancee over for family gatherings even after she had cheated on me. I can't pretend to know how much worse it is after 15 years of marriage but I can sympathize with the spark. I hope things work out for you better going forward. I'm having a pretty bad day myself

!Reprieve@lemmy.zip is here for all these guys needing a space to talk about this stuff instead of turning it into cancer or alcoholism

Ooooof oh no, that sucks. I get the paranoia I'd be freaking out too. Rather just know early and get it over with myself. But hey don't count the chickens before they hatch and all.

Eeeey! I am so glad the last week has worked out well for you man. First step is always the hardest but it sounds like everything is working out well for you and I'm happy to hear. I dunno about any higher powers, but you can be confident and proud in the fact that you made this happen for yourself, under your own power, got a give the credit where the credit is due. Hope those frames you were making for the Zelda prints turned out well!

You can vent, you can do whatever here, this space is for you, man. I agree - I wanted this to be a counterpoint to the shitty ass sexist Peterson type bullshit and hoped to have a better space for young men to find a community. Please, if you have any ideas on how better to make that happen, this is my first time doing this kinda thing, feel free to let me know, or to make posts of your own. We're not all doom and gloom here, we're also advice and general tips on surviving as a guy in this world, so if you have words of wisdom or other things that might be useful to men old or young please feel free to share!

It's about respect for the other person, as I see it. You wouldn't be a little miffed if your wife of 10 years sent you a "k thx bai (link to divorce papers)" instead of talking in person?

Filth is magnetic and the youngling is ferrous

Right? The written word is its own kind of instrument and I dig it

It gives rhythm and flavor to your writing. Varied punctuation - where appropriate - is an easy way to spice anything up, give it a little more flavor, more control over how your words are read. There is a quote by Gary Provost that isn't specifically about punctuation but illustrates this point well, it's one of my favorites:

This sentence has five words. Here are five more words. Five-word sentences are fine. But several together become monotonous. Listen to what is happening. The writing is getting boring. The sound of it drones. It’s like a stuck record. The ear demands some variety. Now listen. I vary the sentence length, and I create music. Music. The writing sings. It has a pleasant rhythm, a lilt, a harmony. I use short sentences. And I use sentences of medium length. And sometimes, when I am certain the reader is rested, I will engage him with a sentence of considerable length, a sentence that burns with energy and builds with all the impetus of a crescendo, the roll of the drums, the crash of the cymbals–sounds that say listen to this, it is important

Yes, it's nuanced but it breaks up the sentence flow in a different way. Also used for listing things. A comma is more a small pause, like this. A semicolon is used to differentiate two independent related thoughts ; it's kind of a combination between a period and a comma. A dash can be used for many things - a longer separating of thoughts, listing different points such as this, or just as an intentional emphasis to add a more protracted pause.

I am so SO glad that this helped you! Honestly that makes this whole endeavor already worth it; so long as at least one person benefits from this place it has been worth it. Made me a little emotional myself reading all this, to be honest.

Oh man, LOVE Zelda games, I grew up on those, that was my childhood. Glad to see the little ones of today have an interest in it too. And that sounds like a wonderful project, something to do with your hands, something you can step back and actually see the finished project for and feel accomplished, I love those. You should feel proud of that, and I know your kids will absolutely love seeing that their gift meant so much to you.

You should more than half consider writing a book, not even blowing smoke. Your original letter made me tear up a little bit and if you still have a desire to write, you should do so! Even if you just want to start small. Maybe write a little bed time story or just a (whatever genre they like) for your kids? Highly different from an alien story though lol, I know. But I know your kids would be over the moon for it.

Man, 15 years, I can't even imagine :/ I'm so sorry you've gone through that, brother hugs Relationships have always been....rocky, for me. It's so much easier to be alone but it's also so much easier to fall into a downward spiral like that. Half of the days I just want someone, anyone, to cuddle with watching dumb TV shows and the other half I physically recoil from touch. It's a tough thing that I'm still working on and I don't have a good answer to it myself. I just take it one day at a time and hope that the next day is brighter than the previous.

Please feel free to post as much as you want here; we're all in this life together and if we can make it less shitty for everyone by banding together, in both our grief and our celebrations, then I feel like it's in our best interest to do so. Thank you for being a part of this place and thank you for having the strength to show others that they're not alone!

Wow, man. I can tell you've been hurting a lot and I just wanted to thank you for sharing this here with people. I know how much strength just that one act can take. As much as it feels it right now, you're not alone. You have your boys still, and they will always always need you, no matter if they're 5 or 50. I've been through some bad break ups myself, but I haven't had a relationship last more than 4 years. Typically they've ended when my partner cheats. I've come close to giving up on them entirely but I still have a small spark of hope that there's someone trustworthy out there. Every new person you meet is another roll of the die. You can't give up hope.

Also, this was extremely well written. Have you written much before? I think you should explore that in some way because you clearly have the talent for it. Even if you just start a little journal, written or digital, just for yourself. It can be nice to get things off of your mind and onto paper. I know it helps me. And I would like to personally extend my shoulder to you. If you ever get in a bad spot and you just need someone to listen, or to commiserate with, please message me. The world is better off with you in it and I would like to do everything I can to make sure it stays that way.