They’ve drowned babies doing baptisms before.. if you look online you can find some CRAZY violent orthodox baptisms out of russia and the like. They dunk them babies like a goddamn basketball. Baby pulling mad g forces.
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I’m sure there’s some seagull out there with a 1000-yard stare who went through the most fucked up shit of his life in the 90’s and still remembers it like it was yesterday. He hangs out down by the bars and drinks discarded alcohol out of the trash, trying to forget, and then flies around drunk bumping into things.
The other seagulls look at him and shake their heads with pity “he used to be such a good gull.. so full of promise.”
I wan 2 giv boops and scritches and brusho the teethies
Us common folks may not have flying cars or jetpacks yet but this shit is pretty dope.
That’s what I’ll ask christian mothers from now on.
“If you really love your children how come you didn’t smother them immediately after their baptism?”
For me?! Wait till I tell my friends, they always called me a loser but NOT anymore. I’m coming up in the world boys!
Jokes on you I already felt pretty stupid
I feel like Obama either lays pipe like a master or cums immediately, there’s no in between.
Everywhere I look everything is getting fucked to death. Insects, fish, entire ecosystems, entire climates, entire regions near the equator, all FUCKED.
Then my uncle says “how come it’s getting colder some places, I thought the globe was supposed to be warming! Hahahah”
At least he can arguably not give a fuck. He is rich and has no kids. I don’t get why the poors on the right side of the spectrum are so willing to parrot this idiotic bullshit though, don’t they realize their 600 even-poorer grandchildren are FUCKED?
It actually washes away your own bodies’ natural lubrication.. you’d think sex in the shower would be nice and slick and warm but it’s terrible and rubbery and inconsistent.