Egon

Assuming you have a shitty manager that doesn't respect "I'm not coming into work due to sickness. Using a PTO/NPTO day":
Food poisoning is a classic, people know it involves puking and shitting and fever, so they won't ask a lot of questions. "A crisis in the family"/"Personal crisis" is also good and vague, you can indicate something horrible has happened without having to explain in large detail due to it being "personal". You can also fake having a traffic accident/having your ride be fucked up somehow.

Regarding needing to be seen as good: Your work owes you sick days, the fact that it believes it doesn't is insane. You yourself decide when you are not well enough to go to work, and mental health is also health. If your workplace does not believe it's workers can get sick, then you should not believe it is owed an explanation. Furthermore: Most unions (where I'm from) that require sick-days also require that the boss cannot ask about the nature of the sickness as long as it is less than 3 days.

To all the people who believe Ukraine should continue fighting, why do you not volunteer?
The ukranians do not wish to fight this war. They have to be forced. The men are not allowed to leave, the average age in the army is 43 and the army has to forcibly conscript people to force them to the front 1 2 3 going so far as to raid high school gyms

It is clear the average ukrainian does not wish to fight. If you believe this war must continue, why do you not volunteer? Surely you are not that much of a coward that you find it acceptable people should be forced to be thrown into a meatgrinder?

The average age of the ukrainian ~~forced conscript~~ fighter is 43. NATO countries have emptied their stockpiles and are struggling to rearm, hampering their abilities to deal with other crises (like Ansar Allah), the West is staring down the barrel of a massive recession as gas prices still climb and production falls lower and lower. Russia is still able to produce enough shells to maintain a stockpile, and manages to hold and advance its fronts when it wishes, something that cannot be said for Ukraine or NATO.
The ukrainians do not wish to fight. They are being kidnapped to the front, their passports are taken from them. Why should this war continue? Russia is still ascendant, the ukrainians do not wish to fight, and they have just now received an incredibly generous offer? If you still believe this cause is necessary, why do you not volunteer? Ukraine needs bodies.

Joining NATO would mean nuclear holocaust. Thankfully some people are rational enough to realise that this would be a bad thing. Joining NATO in spite of pledging not to would also delegitimize NATO and Ukraine in the eyes of the international community furthering the developing multipolarity we see. There is also the question of wether or not NATO membership is even on the table for Ukraine. Before the war Zelensky was informed he had to pretend it was, while having been informed it wasn't behind closed doors.

Shouldn't the Leopard tanks have turned the tide of battle? Or the NATO equipment and training? Or the other round of NATO equipment and training? Or the MANPADS? Or the third shipment of NATO equipment and training? Or the F-16s that are totally coming any day now (which will definitely turn the tide of the war guise! It's not silly to make a plane that can't handle dirt on the airway)? What about the drone tactics Ukraine used to terrorbomb russian civilian targets, wasn't that supposed to turn the tide of the war? What about the bombing of the Crimea bridge, how come that didn't turn the tide of the war?
You guys keep saying Russia is about to run out of equipment, but they still have stocks and stocks of shells, meanwhile NATO countries are struggling to rearm after having donated so much equipment to Ukraine. Maybe there isn't a wunderwaffe that will win the war, and maybe it's senseless to continue this meat-grinder. The Ukrainians don't want to fight, they have to be forcibly conscripted.
But! If you think they should continue to die for some vague cause, why don't you go volunteer? They need bodies. The average age is 43, so you won't be turned away for being "too old" or "too young". Why don't you volunteer for Ukraine?

This war is the most important war of our time! We have to oppose Russia!
Go volunteer then.
No, it is ukrainians fight, we should not interfere.
Stop supporting the conflict then.
:pete: We can't! This war is the most important war of our time! We have to oppose Russia!

Ikea manual for the Barbara Pit

It's funny how it's bad to give the Nazis Czechoslovakia, but it's also bad not to give them the entirety of Poland.

Saying "I don't do social media" isn't bragging. It might make people interrogate their own habits, which can provoke a negative reaction, but that's on them and any response would do that, so there is nothing to be done about it. Either way it's not bragging. Say it in a light tone/with a smile so people know it's just meant as a nice thing. Consider providing an alternative, which will also soften the blow, because it makes it clear that you just dont do social media.

Do not worry about seeming "old". It's quaint and also something you can joke about, which makes for a good conversation. Consider providing your alternative (if it's a phone number) alongside a recognition that it is atypical/old-fashioned, to get ahead of the perception you're afraid of - It lets you control the narrative. It can also help with your worries about wether or not you're being perceived as "old" because you yourself bring it up.

Don't talk about privacy or opsec unless people ask into it, and keep it surface level and let people themselves ask more questions.

Edit: let me know if you want a tone indicator or have any clarifying questions

When I see this take I always ask "If you think this war is so important, why don't you go volunteer for Ukraine? They need people." I've never gotten a response.

All the visuals are boring.

Agree to disagree I guess

I can relate to those thoughts and I've just been diagnosed with heavy depression. If you're also tired all of the time you might want to go to the doctor's.

Anyway regarding your parents: Who they are now might not have been who they were when they decided to have you (I know mine weren't).
Either way, you're not responsible for your parents happiness, but I'm pretty sure they're very happy that you exist, they just don't like each other.

It sounds like you're taking on a responsibility that isn't really supposed to be yours, so I just want to say: You didn't keep them together, their unwillingness to accept that they should be apart did. They might have used you as an excuse for this unwillingness, but that's on them, not you. You are not responsible for that, just like you're not responsible for their relationship. They are adult sapient beings who should be able to look at their relationship and realise that they are bad for each other. The fact that they have a child together shouldn't be a complication, in fact it should have made it easier for them to make the responsible decision, so they could provide you with two stable loving homes, instead of one unstable home.
You are not responsible for your parents. They are responsible for themselves and in fact they are responsible for you, because they are your parents. It should not be you lamenting your existence, but them lamenting the fact that they have pushed you to think such a thing. You are not responsible for your parents.