A BabyApe looks pretty neat - cheap enough, well-reviewed, comes with a PNP version so I can use my own tx/rx so I just need to figure out how it all plugs together. When I build a bot I just get a 4-channel receiver (I found one a super lightweight one that works with my tx) and plug each motor's ESC into an appropriate channel. I have a feeling flight controllers make that different.
Can I fpv without buying goggles, using my phone or something? That's the newest thing for me I think - combat bots usually don't have cameras.
God I need to do so much research.
My org is full of queer people which is pretty neat, so I'm hoping me and the other tiny trans girl I will be working with will look disarming enough that nobody fucks with us this time.