AutomatedPossum

"What's wrong with not knowing how to adress people in a way that offers the absolute bare minimum of respect and avoids outright hate speech?"

You're presenting this as a hypothetical, but this, plus a strict requirement to live as a heterosexual post transition, was the socially and medically enforced one way to be trans throughout the 2nd half of the 20th century. Transmedicalism isn't something that some weirdos in our community came up with on their own, it was invented by cis people to control us, and it still dominates most medical and legal systems worldwide.

The forced sterilization part in particular has been a core part of the first gender ID law in Sweden, it was adopted by many other jurisdictions, it was on the books in Germany until 2011, it still is law in Japan today. There's just a dozen nation states worldwide that legally recognize nonbinary people. Most medical systems still require some form of transmed gatekeeping instead of operating under an informed consent model, and a lot of trans people, especially poor and PoC ones, still need to live stealth for safety reasons.

I had a very strong impression many of the complaints came from concern trolling cis people and they weren't very convincing in hiding their transphobia. They particularly did not complain about a lack of neopronouns, although some complained about opsec reasons - which can be easily adressed by picking none / use name or another neutral option, or just lying - if you value opsec over validation of your gender identity, why would you need a site culture where he / him is the implied default?

If people weren't happy with the lack of neopronouns (which was, ofc, a legitimate concern), why would they oppose pronoun tags on principle instead of demanding them, but with more inclusive options? The majority of the criticism back then was thinly veiled transphobia, please don't try to legitimize that.

delenda est

Cissies not being forced to pick pronouns is pure revisionism and needs to be adressed ASAP. If people have deliberately circumvented the pronoun selection, they should also get banned.

"Don't wash in direct sunlight " looks like a gremlin-vampire hybrid to me, you have to meet both vulnerabilities at the same time, but that also means it goes into beast mode and bursts into flames

Another important thing and why i wrote "passing and pretty" is that a lot of trans people, especially transfems, conflate passing and being conventionally attractive. Sure, both are nice, both are obvious goals, but these aren't the same. You can look like shit and still pass perfectly, you can be hot af and be immediately clockable. A lot of transfems don't get that. They don't just aim to look like a girl, they aim to look like some influencer. I don't go for that, i'm not a teenage girl, i'm a fat old lesbian and my goal is looking like a fat old lesbian, not only because that's easier to achieve than being mfing ContraPoints, but because a fat old lesbian is who i am and it's cool as hell. I don't have to be attractive to some cishet guy who is doing sexuality by the numbers and struggles with being horny for somebody his bros would consider to just be a 6/10, in fact it's a massive advantage for me when i am invisible to that person and am instead attractive in a way that mostly works on queer women with severe mommy issues.

I get "flowery" and "intensity 2", but how much mint do you have to eat to produce "refreshing" farts?

I think from now on i'll gauge my HRT dose by the amount of emotional devastation videos of bottlefed baby badgers make me feel, seems to work about as reliable as the bloodwork at my endocrinologist.

It could be a step in the right direction. Wanting to be cis is a dead end that we need to abandon at some point, true self acceptance is only possible when we embrace transness and all its contradictions, and that's a pretty long process. Especially early on when there's still so much to endure it can seem almost impossible. But even moving from "i wish i was cis" to "i wish i would pass better and i wish i was prettier" is an improvement, because these are goals you can actually work on to at least some degree.

this is a Chinese psyop (so-called "xi-op") to turn all the bernie bros into puppygirls

Eh. I'm all for letting people use the labels they feel most comfortable with, i don't care that there's people who think it's contradictory that i call myself a nonbinary trans woman, or that i use lesbian as a label in spite of theoretically being bi / pan. Queerness always includes some amount of ambiguity and some amount of defiance, and our language should be a way to combat epistemic injustice, that is: to fight cishetnormative society's attempts to deny us the language to describe our own experiences. I refuse to let my labels function as a taxonomy for straights that see me as a specimen; they should be jumping-off points to explore how i violate norms imposed upon me, cues for freely improvising gender and sexuality. Trans women have no obligation to stick to gender conforming labels and always insist on being the girliest girls, it can be extremely liberating to allow ourselves androgynity.

With that out of the way, i see way too often that there's both chasers who use this particular language on dating apps, and trans women who will put up with the grossest fetishizing because they think it's the only way for them to get laid at all. So i can't really say what i think of that when you put it in a vacuum, it could be "yeah, that's what she calls herself, cool that she has the guts to do that with all the transmisogyny around" or it could be super fucking sad. I'm not gonna judge her in the latter case, the blame for this should be on a transphobic system, not on trans people who see no less humuliating way to navigate it, but ... speaking from experience, when trans people have internalized that much transphobia that they're willing to put up with being treated like this by cissies, they're not safe for me to be around and i'll gtfo, that's just necessary self care.