AcidSmiley

joined 4 years ago
[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 13 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

what does being visibly trans mean to you? like, emotionally. do you think it's important? is it something that you're comfortable with?

Well first of all, i have no fucking idea what "being visibly trans" entails as long as you do not hold up a sign saying "out and proud trans warrior". I'm a bit over one and a half years into the physical part my transition (you can add two more years for questioning and transitioning socially) and i wouldn't say that i have had particularly great starting conditions for passing, but it actually seems to work reasonably well for me since i got rid of my facial hair and started growing my boobs. I don't feel as if i'm "visibly trans", and that's not even getting into how many trans people i know who do not have any commonly understood visible clichés of transness or how many cis people do have a ton of these supposed telltale signs. From my lived experience, i do not think that "being visibly trans" is a thing for most of us once we're a few years into our transitions.

And then there's girls who started transitioning literally 20 years earlier than me, who have much more visible curves, who i do not perceive as having bad passing at all, yet they make plausible claims that they've never gotten gendered correctly by strangers a single time in their life, and they have the history of being victims to hate crimes to prove it. And i seriously don't know why they go through life with such hardships and i don't. It makes zero sense to me. I don't get what constitutes "visible transness", there seems to be very little connecting the transfems i know who pass most of the time and there seems to be very little connecting those that don't. It comes off as incredibly random in either case.

i think passing fully would be great but i don't know who i'd be if i lost that thread tugging at my heart when i'm waiting in line at the store or whatever.

For me, it mostly meant that i stopped viewing transness as a deficit narrative and now view it entirely as a liberatory and subversive experience. When i do not pass, i violate established notions of gender because i refuse to be put in a neatly labeled box and confuse people with my gender presentation and when i do pass, i violate established notions of gender as well because i'm fully free from the restrictions people who want to assign me the wrong gender try to pin on me and because i prove the "you can always tell" crowd wrong. I win either way, cisnormativity loses either way.

And this is infinitely better than all this dysphoria-centric bs and all this passing-obsessed bs that i'm so fucking fed up with. I'm not a fan of how our community commonly talks about the trans experience, hexbear isn't even a particularly bad place in this regard and reading the mega is still a minefield of self hatred and internalised transphobia where i just scroll past all the spoilers, and past all the shit that should be spoilered and wonder what i'm doing here. I do not let myself be defined by suffering and pain and never being good enough, fuck that noise. I'm free in a hundred ways cishets can't even conceive off, i'm out there finally being me and finally living the life i've always deserved, why should i feel anything but joy about being trans? And don't give me any of this "but being cis would be so much easier" crap, i do not know a single cis woman who's happy in the way i am.

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 23 points 1 year ago (3 children)

crushing on two cute trans girls at the same time and knowing that both are fine with that feels so good omg

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

skin tight extreme short shorts with the words "POUND THIS" written across his ass

lmao i need some of those

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago

Yeah, it absolutely is absurd, but a ton of libs out there don't even clear that bar and will fold to transphobes as soon as they face backlash like that.

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 6 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (2 children)

making the

HOMOEROTIC SUBTEXT

in wrestling just text

hexbear-pride

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 12 points 1 year ago (4 children)

He also was kinda weird about me being attracted to women

potential red flag tbh

are you in any way dependent on the guy? Like, does the place you live require psychological gatekeeping such as recommendation letters for gender affirming care?

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 74 points 1 year ago

"lol" said the scorpion, "lmao"

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 10 points 1 year ago

I'm going for a very similar process (main difference being that the triangular pieces that are removed in the gif towards the end get added to the vaginal walls for more depth, and that the procedure involves removing all scrotal follicles from the inside so i don't have to get that done through electrolysis in advance) and from what several of my friends told me, the pain is manageable. Really strong painkillers are normally only needed in the first few days.

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

I've been wondering if the stuff will go in the plastics or the residual waste bin ever since they found microplastics in balls.

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 30 points 1 year ago

lmao, your egg's about to get cracked, James

[–] AcidSmiley@hexbear.net 24 points 1 year ago

I would've thought the actual reason the Tories have made themselves hated enough to lose against Keir fucking Starmer of all people is that they're the exact same kind of floundering, rabbitholed bellend as the person who's written that article, but i guess when you're an anglofascist nosferatu writing for the Economist, being honest with yourself isn't a skill you usually possess.

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