this post was submitted on 07 Mar 2024
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chapotraphouse

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[–] oregoncom@hexbear.net 37 points 1 year ago (4 children)

lotion on nightstand

for $1000 you can live in my jerking off room.

[–] FourteenEyes@hexbear.net 33 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Gooning chamber for rent, never jizzed

[–] anonochronomus@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago

"Oh, you're early for check in! Don't mind me, I was just cranking my hog in the bed you're about to rent. Put 'er here... oh that's a clean wet... i promise."

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 21 points 1 year ago (1 children)

Money bags over here has a room just for choking the chicken. Lotion too!

[–] Aryuproudomenowdaddy@hexbear.net 22 points 1 year ago (3 children)

I found a Craigslist ad several years back where they stated that they liked to jack it in the living room watching porn on the big TV and sometimes left cum rags laying around. Apparently this had caused tension with previous roommates so he felt inclined to mention this was something you needed to be ok with.

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 14 points 1 year ago

What can't a fella crank it to 4k dogfart in the living room without upsetting the morality police?

[–] glans@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago

good for them getting consent

i bet they found a perfect roommate who wasn't you

[–] manuallybreathing@lemmy.ml 10 points 1 year ago

masturbatorium

[–] Thordros@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago

The ideal rental situation if you need to charge your crystal fast.

[–] emizeko@hexbear.net 26 points 1 year ago

hello prospective tenant! rent my room— it's superficially plausible, but actually wrong

[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 25 points 1 year ago

The mirror makes the room look bigger! so-true

[–] RNAi@hexbear.net 15 points 1 year ago

Spicious room

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 9 points 1 year ago

The room repels bears

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 8 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago) (1 children)

Idgi, whats the issue? Its tiled, which is weird unless it's someplace warm, but otherwise? Maybe the mobile version cuts off some of the picture, because I can't see any details like price or location

[–] odmroz@hexbear.net 7 points 1 year ago (2 children)

they spelled spacious wrong. Specious is a word that describes something that seems right but actually isn't true. Like "a specious argument"

[–] Egon@hexbear.net 4 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

Oh, thats funny. Thank you

[–] brainw0rms@hexbear.net 3 points 1 year ago* (last edited 1 year ago)

I scrolled past this post 3 times thinking I understood the joke, before I realized it didn't mistakenly say "Suspicious Room for rent". bateman-business-card