this post was submitted on 08 Feb 2024
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the_dunk_tank

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It's the dunk tank.

This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.

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I don't really care about the stupid "classified documents stuff", I just think that it is funny that POTUS will not be charged because he is too cognitively impaired.

"He did not remember when he was vice president" is also funny. My son died and I was the Democratic VP was Biden's main pitch to the Dem primary electorate lmao.

https://twitter.com/frankthorp/status/1755686479345471962

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GF1zJJtWQAApS5z?format=png&name=900x900

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[–] Coolkidbozzy@hexbear.net 84 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Time for kamala to invoke section 4 of the 25th amendment. It's her turn

[–] UnapologeticAnarchist@hexbear.net 57 points 2 years ago (5 children)

I'm depressed that I'm all about this option. Fuck our collective lives😒

[–] WIIHAPPYFEW@hexbear.net 46 points 2 years ago

agony-immense HELLWORLD, MOTHERFUCKER agony-immense

WE THOUGHT THE LATE BUSH ERA AND 1979-1982 WERE GRIM BUT WHEW MAMA

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[–] girl_liker@hexbear.net 73 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Voting for Biden's second term solely because it's the funniest possible outcome

[–] mamotromico@lemmy.ml 79 points 2 years ago (4 children)

Since I got less skin the game (don’t live in the US), the funniest outcome for me would be trump being convicted, elected, and then pardoning himself.

I feel like the liberal population would implode

[–] silent_water@hexbear.net 61 points 2 years ago (10 children)

I'm holding out hope that he gets convicted in some state (Georgia, probably) and then can't pardon himself so he has to serve out his term from a jail cell. that would be the absolute funniest outcome and so on brand for the US.

[–] WIIHAPPYFEW@hexbear.net 34 points 2 years ago (2 children)

At most three months down the line some ex cops will sneak him out in a storage box like el chapo

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[–] GrouchyGrouse@hexbear.net 29 points 2 years ago

He will build his own gaudy prison for him and his cabinet ala Pablo Escobar

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[–] hexaflexagonbear@hexbear.net 70 points 2 years ago

On the one hand he probably has dementia, on the other hand I can relate to everything before 2020 being a big timeless blob. Beau died in the before time, when exactly? Who can say

[–] MaxOS@hexbear.net 67 points 2 years ago (4 children)

It's more than Joever. We have reached Joeblivion.

[–] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 38 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] zed_proclaimer@hexbear.net 24 points 2 years ago

Avoid the Joid

[–] MemesAreTheory@hexbear.net 26 points 2 years ago

can't believe we don't have a "Joekerfied" emoji. We need this guy in joker makeup stat brandon

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[–] CommunistBear@hexbear.net 66 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Bit idea: call out the "biden or bust" freaks for rampant elder abuse and that Joe should be able to "retire with dignity"

[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 53 points 2 years ago (1 children)

This was a bit idea we bandied about in 2020.

[–] 0x0520@hexbear.net 49 points 2 years ago

The bit being old just adds a layer.

[–] MaxOS@hexbear.net 56 points 2 years ago

It's so funny that this was supposed to be a victory lap for Biden not being charged, and then these juicy details come out.

[–] YoungSheldonAdelson@hexbear.net 56 points 2 years ago

The Democrats not being found culpable for war crimes they're committing: "It's this crazy loophole in the system that the wrong political party discovered." whywhywhywhywhy

[–] Philosoraptor@hexbear.net 48 points 2 years ago (4 children)

There's no fucking way he'll stay in the race now right? anakin-padme-2

[–] MaxOS@hexbear.net 31 points 2 years ago

They just doubled his adderall prescription

[–] BigBoyKarlLiebknecht@hexbear.net 25 points 2 years ago

If he makes it to the election, I’m gonna write in Hillary for president

If they replace him I’m gonna write in Joe for president

Either way, I’m gonna vote so hard

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[–] glans@hexbear.net 47 points 2 years ago (2 children)

if there's one thing you have to say about donald trump, it's that he is fit to stand trial

[–] comrade_pibb@hexbear.net 39 points 2 years ago (1 children)

standing lessons coming in handy

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[–] TimeTravel_0@hexbear.net 47 points 2 years ago (4 children)

man if these material conditions are not yet sufficient, we aint never getting no glorious people's revolution

[–] Llituro@hexbear.net 58 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

the magic part is the unremitting system of extreme violence keeping the labor price of the global south as low as possible. material conditions are "good enough" pretty much for that reason alone. the other reason is the number and quality of guns and cameras pointed inwards.

[–] TimeTravel_0@hexbear.net 42 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I cant shake the feeling that revolution might come too late and wont be able to prevent a catastrophic collapse of human civilization caused by climate change.

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[–] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 50 points 2 years ago (1 children)

something's coming but it's not gonna be coming out of the USA, at least not from the parts with electricity

[–] TimeTravel_0@hexbear.net 25 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Electricity = no revolution?

[–] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 39 points 2 years ago

it's going to be the people outside the walls

[–] GrumpigPoopBalls@hexbear.net 27 points 2 years ago

Uphold Marxist-Kacynskist thought

[–] barrbaric@hexbear.net 43 points 2 years ago

We've still got 99 flavors of bread and all the circuses you could want. It's definitely going to have to get worse.

[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 27 points 2 years ago

Too much propaganda has rotted the mind of the average Westerner, especially those from ex-Soviet and ex-Warsaw pact countries.

[–] mayo_cider@hexbear.net 42 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Listen here Jack, I grew up in the community pool until Rusty Razor Jackson drove my white family to section 8 housing in Detroit

I tried to make smoking weed a capital punishment, but they still don't let me fly the drone or even press the nuclear button

But I'm still better than Clinton... Osama... What's that name? Oh right, Kid Rock

Vote for me, John Biden

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[–] SorosFootSoldier@hexbear.net 41 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Some @ sign moron is going to come in here and split hairs over how the document doesn't literally cite dementia therefore we're a bunch of lying Trump loving MAGA extremists.

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[–] SkingradGuard@hexbear.net 38 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

How many presidents does that make it that have had it now? michael-laugh

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Their new campaign slogan:

“Joe Biden presumably knows roughly which country he is in right now. And that matters. Trump!”

[–] tactical_trans_karen@hexbear.net 37 points 2 years ago

This is how democracy dies, to the maniacal laughing of the jackals on hexbear. sicko-wistful

[–] Melina@hexbear.net 35 points 2 years ago (2 children)

If they have a debate I just want trump to keep asking Biden to draw a clock and say nothing else until he attempts to draw a clock

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[–] Hestia@hexbear.net 34 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

"Biden released classified documents."

Libs: "gasp"

"But it's because he has dementia."

Libs: "oh thank god"

[–] Lemmygradwontallowme@hexbear.net 30 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Honestly, I think taking the senile crowd of senate out via cuck pit, machine gun fire, or du canon classique now seems quite merciful, considering their cognitive impairment and age...

brump barbara-pit xi-gun

[–] RyanGosling@hexbear.net 30 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

Despite abundant differences between the cases, Trump immediately seized on the special counsel report to portray himself as a victim of a “two-tiered system of justice.”

Let’s see what the differences are

Yet even as Hur found evidence that Biden willfully held onto and shared with a ghostwriter highly classified information, the special counsel devoted much of his report to explaining why he did not believe the evidence met the standard for criminal charges, including a high probability that the Justice Department would not be able to prove Biden’s intent beyond a reasonable doubt, citing among other things an advanced age that they said made him forgetful and the possibility of “innocent explanations” for the records that they could not refute.

“I did not share classified information,” Biden insisted. “I did not share it with my ghostwriter.” He added he wasn’t aware how the boxes containing classified documents ended up in his garage.

The investigation into Biden is separate from special counsel Jack Smith’s inquiry into the handling of classified documents by Trump after Trump left the White House. Smith’s team has charged Trump with illegally retaining top secret records at his Mar-a-Lago home and then obstructing government efforts to get them back. Trump has said he did nothing wrong.

Hur, in his report, said there were “several material distinctions” between the Trump and Biden cases, noting that Trump refused to return classified documents to the government and allegedly obstructed the investigation, while Biden willfully handed them over.

So they already know he shared highly classified info with a ghostwriter lol. But it’s very different because he handed the material over.

Yet, prosecutors say, he kept notebooks containing classified information in unlocked drawers at home.

Biden kept classified documents in a garage and unlocked drawers. Trump kept them in his bathroom. Truly the most intelligent and capable candidates to lead this country

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[–] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 29 points 2 years ago
[–] sir_this_is_a_wendys@hexbear.net 29 points 2 years ago

Special counsel: Biden cannot be expected to draw a clock

[–] Elon_Musk@hexbear.net 27 points 2 years ago

This is really pretty bad because Hur is quite clearly not some Trump chud.

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