this post was submitted on 04 Feb 2024
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Not The Onion

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[–] pearsaltchocolatebar@discuss.online 65 points 2 years ago (3 children)

If you've ever lived in a rural area, this isn't even remotely onion level weird.

[–] LinkOpensChest_wav@lemmy.dbzer0.com 23 points 2 years ago (2 children)

I was thinking the same. I knew a Burger King like this. Perhaps surprisingly, it was one of the cleaner, more well-maintained BKs I've visited.

[–] Worx@lemmynsfw.com 28 points 2 years ago (2 children)

If you're doing some real illegal stuff, you don't want an inspection just because you didn't keep your frier up to spec

[–] ReiRose@lemmy.world 17 points 2 years ago (1 children)
[–] Jf2540@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

Exactly, one crime at a time, baby!

[–] dan@upvote.au 5 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (2 children)

It's something I see a lot on Cops (the TV show). They pull someone over because one of their brake lights is out or they went through a stop sign or something like that, and it turns out they have drugs in the car or a warrant for their arrest or something similar. It seems like some of them would get away with it if they didn't give police any reason to pull them over.

[–] pearsaltchocolatebar@discuss.online 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Most criminals aren't very intelligent.

[–] LeadEyes@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I've never met a prompt and reliable drug dealer.

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[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 1 points 2 years ago

Well, they're the ones on COPS.

[–] HornyOnMain@kbin.social 10 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Ah, I see they sold Adderall

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[–] Stupidmanager@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Rural? Ha! I live in a medium city, suburbs’ish, and 30 years ago I could go through the taco bell drive thru to get weed. This isn’t a new idea.

[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 16 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Same. I grew up in Fort Worth and used to buy weed and LSD at the burger king drive thru. The manager was the dealer and we had code words for stuff. Whopper with extra lettuce was weed obviously. He'd ask, "how many?" to define the amount. For the acid we would say, "make sure the order is correct, I'm not making 2 (3,4,etc..) trips back here.".

Those were good times. Plus the dude was born with no right hand and we had all went to school together and had tons of great nick names for him like, "the one handed bandit" or, "the one handed hash slinger" or my favorite, "the handy man". Before you think I'm an ass he's the one who gave himself these names.

The best thing was watching him weigh out a bag with a postal scale and roll it up all with one hand. For a dude with half the amount of usual hands he was incredibly handy. You had to hand it to him.

Also when you left he would stick out his arm and say give me some nub. You know, instead of a fist bump.

[–] Apollo2323@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 years ago

Lol the handy man

[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 1 points 2 years ago

It is shit like this that made the Thieves' Cant.

[–] mx_smith@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Yeah I used get my weed from the sonic.

[–] GladiusB@lemmy.world 10 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I remember that our KFC got busted by selling because the code was for "an extra biscuit". I was like "who doesn't order extra biscuits?!" Dumbest code word ever.

[–] grayman@lemmy.world 2 points 1 year ago

Code should have been an extra large side of green beans. No one ate that nasty mush of canned green beans.

[–] DogPeePoo@lemm.ee 33 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Hot eats

Cool treats

Now let’s dig a hole in the yard

[–] AnonWyo@startrek.website 3 points 2 years ago

"Cool treats"

It's not called Ice for nothin'...

[–] AngryishHumanoid@lemmy.world 18 points 2 years ago

It's genius, once all your teeth fall out what are you going to want to eat? Soft serve!

[–] Fog0555@lemmy.world 18 points 2 years ago

Now that's a way to keep your customers coming back!

[–] phoneymouse@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I used to work at a major fast food restaurant with a drive-thru. My coworker sold weed through that drive-thru.

[–] LaunchesKayaks@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago

My stepfather knew a guy who delivered pizzas and the people who wanted him to deliver weed with the pizza requested him specifically. Dude made enough as a pizza delivery guy that he was able to buy a hella fancy sports car. Tbh, the idea was gold and I'm happy he was successful lol.

[–] grasshopper_mouse@lemmy.world 15 points 2 years ago (3 children)

Back in the 90s, I was an exchange student in Australia, and there was a Pizza Hut where you could place an order for "1 stick of garlic bread" and they'd sell you weed.

I also recall a Wienerschnitzel near my mom's apartment in Sacramento, CA selling cocaine out the drive-thru window around the same time period.

[–] eskimofry@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

Lol, Imagine that dude who was actually craving garlic bread: "Wtf is this shit, I ordered some crispy bread!"

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[–] _number8_@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago (8 children)

i mean just leave them be

what, are people gonna just stop doing meth because the cops made it slightly harder to get?

[–] PlainSimpleGarak@lemm.ee 1 points 2 years ago

~~Reddit~~ Lemmy moment.

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[–] ImplyingImplications@lemmy.ca 12 points 2 years ago (1 children)

My town had a local shawarma place get busted for cocaine smuggling. I always laughed at the thought of some new guy getting nervous.

"Anything to drink, sir?"
"Do you guys have any coke?"
"ABSOLUTELY NOT! WHO TOLD YOU THAT?? GET OUT OF HERE!"

[–] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 9 points 2 years ago (1 children)

is pepsiphetamine ok instead?

[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 2 points 2 years ago

Ew, gross. I don't want flat tasting coke. But if that's all you have let me cop a teener.

[–] chaogomu@kbin.social 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

My hometown had the Dairy Queen raided by the DEA back in the early 90s. They sold all sorts of drugs off of a secret menu.

[–] fraydabson@sopuli.xyz 4 points 2 years ago

lol my home town had a restaurant I worked at that was a huge front and was raided by the DEA during peak hours.

[–] Blackout@kbin.social 6 points 2 years ago

It's true what they say, you can get meth at the dairy Queen in Clifton, Texas

[–] Default_Defect@midwest.social 4 points 2 years ago (1 children)

In the town I used to live, it was the KFC instead. The Ford lot across the street was where they cooked it.

[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 1 points 2 years ago

That's why the "spices" are such a secret

[–] niktemadur@lemmy.world 3 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Sounds like something straight outta Florida Man.
But it being Tejas is close enough.

[–] TheGalacticVoid@lemm.ee 1 points 2 years ago

Don't you dare compare Texas to Florida! We're nowhere near their levels of crazy.

[–] betterdeadthanreddit@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Apropos of nothing, who's up for some ice cream?

[–] rdyoung@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

Don't mind if I do.

[–] KingJalopy@lemm.ee 1 points 2 years ago

I'm always down. Been trying to cut back but damn that stuff is addictive!

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