This is absolutely going to get somebody who had a subscription killed because the airbag couldn't connect to the service to check in the 1/4 of a second it had to go off.
the_dunk_tank
It's the dunk tank.
This is where you come to post big-brained hot takes by chuds, libs, or even fellow leftists, and tear them to itty-bitty pieces with precision dunkstrikes.
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that's absurd, it probably checks in periodically when it's in range of service and then decides whether to brick itself. it's going to get somebody who had a subscription killed because of a database error or bugged firmware update.
Okay, so apparently there's an indicator light at the beginning that tells you if your subscription is active. Presumably they have at least one person who passed their realtime programming course and it's designed around making sure you never give off a green light unless the suit is ready to inflate.
But a company that charges a subscription for airbag deployment may be too cheap to hire actual software engineers lmao
Presumably they have at least one person who passed their realtime programming course and it's designed around making sure you never give off a green light unless the suit is ready to inflate.
wheeze
Surely the "subscription airbag" company understands design of safety-critical systems amd would not cut corners for the sake of profit.
okay so bugged firmware update, then
I get frustrated when a game glitches out, but it's ludicrous that this could happen with an airbag.
reupping my subscription on the road and dying because I didn't drive close enough to any routers
you say it's absurd but you haven't met the techbros I have
i have but i was pretending not to for the purposes of the bit to play with some other failure modes, in truth i acknowledge that the possibility of that is not so absurd
valid
Screaming "siri renew my airbag subscription!" as I'm flying through the air
The Ai-1 Airbag Vest and In&Box DPP (Detect-Protect-Perfect) platform is the first continually evolving motorcycle protection technology driven by artificial intelligence.
Honestly just having the airbag be electronic is dangerous enough. Imagine dying because you forgot to plug your airbag in a couple days in a row and the battery was out.
STOP PUTTING THE INTERNET INTO EVERYTHING!!! STOP MAKING EVERYTHING A SUBSCRIPTION MODEL!!! STOOPPPP
but I just want an unlimited constant income stream with no more effort! Meritocracy!
hitting this dude with that dolphin device and watching his airbag inflate and deflate every 5 seconds
I think this vest uses a proprietary canister so it can only go off once.
You gotta get it re-charged by sending it in. You can't just buy the canister.
It's $12 a month, surely you loony leftists can afford that.
wait so the vest is networked?
next question: is it secure?
The S in IoT stands for Security
Dying in a crash because my ping was too high to activate my airbag on time
Somehow the stupidest thing happened and we live in the Watch_Dogs imagined future where hackers will be able to kill you with your internet-of-things connected vegetable juice machine.
There are many things that make me glad that I am not a motorcycle guy
This is one of them
There are airbags out there that use a simple tether. Small bumps don't set it off, but if you're thrown from your bike it does, no electronics necessary.
Alternatively if you ride with someone, they can be your airbag.
You will own nothing and be happy.
You will own nothing
*happiness costs extra
Shit at that point it would probably be safer to just bypass it manually, dig in there for the can and connect the valve to some piano wire or something, hook the other end onto your bike so it gets pulled automatically like a grenade if you leave your seat. The tripwire that saves you instantly
that's already a thing. much cheaper and it uses standard air canisters.
Unironically love unknowingly inventing things that have already been invented, it's like a little test to see if brain still work good
meanwhole bazingas microdose lsd to make sure they only invent things that are shittier versions of what already exist lol.
In the future air will be privatized and you have to pay a subscription to continue breathing
Next service: subscription door locks. If you’re trapped in your burning car, you must subscribe to unlock.
If you don't like it, just shop around for another "unlock the doors to your burning car" service.
Tired: Fail safe / fail deadly
Wired: Fail deadly / succeed deadly
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It's more of reskinned lease scheme. These are expensive devices, and you can either buy the whole device up-front, or you can buy a cheaper version and pay a monthly fee to make up the difference. Either $800 up front, or $400 up front + $12/mo or $120/yr for three years.
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There is no world in which you die because "your airbag's ping is too high". It checks your subscription once a day before you leave home; part of getting ride-ready is making sure your airbag is prepped. If you have no sub, the device warns you, the same as if the airbag was faulty or unready for any other reason.
It's absurd on the face of it, but I'm not sure it's worse than a world where motorcyclists don't get airbags if they don't have $800 right now.
In the event you don't pay they have made a deliberate decision to just let you die. Wall.
I hate rent-seeking! I hate rent-seeking!
lmao I learned about this one via Fortnine. They lure you in with a "too good to be true" low price, and then stick you with their bullshit.
Luckily there are other options out there. For now.
Fucking rediculous