There's a whole lot of different takes here already, so I'm just going to plug this very excellent book: Practical Anarchism: A Guide for Daily Life and bounce.
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Anarchy means nobody is in charge. As soon as somebody with a big stick says theyβre in charge it stops being anarchy.
One thing to keep in mind is that any kind of government is at risk of being the the group with the bigger stick. A dictatorship only works because the group that supports the dictator keeps them in power. A democracy can still treat some of its citizens terribly, and the structure of the government makes is harder to oppose than "the guy with the bigger stick".
Answering the following question might help in clearing up misconceptions: what is anarchism to you ?
From there we can discuss whether or not your definition is correct, and address your question.
Saving this for later, as I want to hear responses as well.
It basically is that. People WANT organization and rules, that's how humans evolved. By working together you become much more efficient. This is why countries form and why nearly any inhabited land has A government. Of course there is always one willing to be leader.
Even with the countries themselves, globalisation has prevented rogue states from doing whatever they want and a clear world order has formed.
Other than civil wars there are no real representations of anarchy, let alone "peaceful" or "utopian".