this post was submitted on 29 Dec 2023
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Off My Chest

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RULES:


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I need to vent. Mods, if this kind of thing isn't welcome in this community anymore...oh well. It helped me feel better at least typing my thoughts into the void.

I got married to a wonderful, beautiful woman in 2021 after being together for 5 years. My parents are big cruise fanatics. They go on vacation like this about once every year or two. We both told them before the wedding - because they did this for my brother when he got married - they can get us whatever they want for a wedding gift, just PLEASE no cruises.

And they listened! We got some very nice, very expensive bedsheets that were perfect!

Fast forward a year. I get a call. My parents booked a 4 day cruise to Mexico over the week after Christmas '23. I'm not particularly assertive, but I was offering pushback on it. I got told shit like "you're getting a free vacation" and "how many opportunities like this are you going to get" and "we tried our best to accommodate you."

My wife also didn't want it. Neither of us asked for this. But after a few months of talking about it, both of us agreed: it's free, let's give it a fair shake.

Fair shake given. We tried our best to like this. I'm writing this from my cabin docked at Cozumel. We deboarded the ship for 15 minutes and were immediately overwhelmed by the crowd. We turned around, went back to our cabin and are now sleeping the day away. Maybe we'll hit up the hot tub before everybody comes back. The crowd is too much. The longer I spend on this gargantuan vessel, the smaller it gets.

My brother, his wife, and their two small kids are also here. I think they're also pretty exhausted. It seems like my parents have gone out of their way to spend time with that foursome. As for me, I only get notifications once they're already somewhere and I have to catch up. I got a message saying "We're at Senor Frogs." I did not get "We're going to Senor Frogs. Wanna meet up?"

I feel like a piece of shit for not appreciating it. I feel invisible because I didn't ask for this. And I feel angry because I feel like an afterthought. I feel like I got invited to this because my parents wanted to spend a week with my brother's kids and I was given a ticket to tag along so I wouldn't feel left out. I wouldn't have felt left out by not being invited to something I didn't want. I wouldn't feel left out if I had been given the opportunity to say no.

I'm just burnt tf out. I want my house. With my quarter acre. And my neighbor with the stupid subwoofer. I want my bed (that doesn't rock because it's on solid ground), my cats, my dog, my plaid pajamas, my cold weather, and my coffee back at home in Oklahoma. I would have rather stayed home and built puzzles with my (also puzzle-loving) wife for a week. We are slow-paced, solitary, almost antisocial creatures. I'm wired differently from my family. And though I feel guilty for being unappreciative of their gesture, I won't feel ashamed of being different. I didn't ask to be this way.

Anyway, if you've made it this far, thanks for reading my rant. I'm done. We shove off back for the States in an hour or so. We're over the hill. We'll be home soon, and I will never do this again.

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[–] Nougat@kbin.social 0 points 2 years ago

I don't pretend to be an expert world traveler, but --

I've been on some Caribbean cruises (the place, not the cruise line), and they've been "okay" to "great." For me, being on a ship sets a clear boundary to my possible activities, which is comfortable. Even on a busy ship, you can always find a quiet place to sit. Yes, if you disembark at a port, you're going to spend your time in the "cruise ship tourist port" area - but, frankly, you generally don't want to wander outside that area anyway. A shore excursion can give you a bit more local flavor, but make sure to book those through the cruise line.

I've also been to St. Maarten a few times, and Aruba, to resorts. St. Maarten is quite easy for American tourists; everyone speaks English, pretty much everywhere will take US dollars, and they have the only international airport in the northern Caribbean outside of Puerto Rico and Dominican Republic (and, I suppose, Cuba, but I can't really go there). If you want to experience local flavor, I can definitely recommend St. Maarten, take a trip to Marigot on the French side. Aruba is a literal desert, and there's a fair bit of historical sightseeing to be done.

[–] shalafi@lemmy.world 0 points 2 years ago

Well, you're there, so do your best.

If you two want to sleep the days away, things are MUCH more chill in the middle of the night. Whole different experience!

If your family is mad about y'all skipping out in the daytime activities? I'm sure there's plenty of good advice as to what to say below.

[–] sir_pronoun@lemmy.world -2 points 2 years ago (2 children)

For the internet drama, I vote that you make the remaining time hell for everyone involved. Dig out those corpses at family dinner. Bring up the time dad cheated on your mom or something like that.

Fake a terrible infectious disease that will get your vessel put in quarantine for a month (even if you don't want that, do it for us)

Find a crew radio and announce that they're not being paid for the rest of the cruise.

Listen to more bad advice from people commenting here!

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[–] OrteilGenou@lemmy.world -3 points 2 years ago (3 children)

Honestly, suck it up. It's a four day cruise, and you're going to strike the victim pose and mope around?

You accepted this gift, so chin up, make the best of it. If all you can focus on is the negative, then that's all it'll be for you.

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[–] Transporter_Room_3@startrek.website -4 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Nah fuck them.

They guilt tripped you into something so they could force that "you owe us" dynamic.

Sounds like narcissists.

I would have told them "we're not going, do not bring it up again." and if they do just block them on everything until after new years. If they want to bitch about it after that, I can just ignore them for years until they get it through their heads.

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