this post was submitted on 09 Dec 2023
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internet funeral

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[–] MuhammadJesusGaySex@lemmy.world 110 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

This reminds me of that old story. One, I have tried to live by.

There was an old man with a huge watermelon patch. Every day a group of kids would come over and steal a single watermelon. The old man was furious about the kids stealing his watermelons and devised a plan. He went out and posted a sign in his patch that said “One of these watermelons is poison. KEEP OUT!”

So, a day goes by, and no stolen watermelon. A week goes by no missing watermelons. The old man is just so pleased with himself and his success. But, then he wakes up after about a week and a half and goes to pick some watermelons, and notices that someone has put a smaller sign next to his. He walks over and the smaller sign simply says “Now there’s two”.

[–] BobGnarley@lemm.ee 29 points 2 years ago

Great joke and great username

[–] subignition@kbin.social 66 points 2 years ago (3 children)
[–] SirSamuel@lemmy.world 36 points 2 years ago (1 children)

And the worse my eyes get, the more fun reading becomes!

[–] someguy3@lemmy.ca 10 points 2 years ago

Just gonna squeeze that r in.

[–] Guntrigger@feddit.ch 5 points 2 years ago

Yeah, even with the pixellation I can see there's an or.

[–] saltnotsugar@lemm.ee 52 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Rat Piss Man - Origins, coming this summer.

[–] WaxedWookie@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago (1 children)

But we already know Fred Trump was a shitty father that left Donald a pile of money and a desperate need for validation...

[–] kamenlady@lemmy.world 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

What we don't know, is the involvement of Erol Musk, a much more shitty father, in this and how it led to Donald being named Donald in the first place...

[–] WaxedWookie@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

I suppose with Trump's that natural, effortless shitbaggery that just seems like breathing for him, I shouldn't be at all surprised he comes from a long line of shitbags.

Can't believe they're making an Elon Muskrat movie

[–] peetabix@lemmy.world 34 points 2 years ago

Watch yo defamity.

[–] Aielman15@lemmy.world 34 points 2 years ago (2 children)

So, what biology project was it? What were they trying to prove?

[–] Karlos_Cantana@kbin.social 83 points 2 years ago (2 children)

They were trying to prove that injecting rat urine into a watermelon will prevent it from being stolen. They probably need to rework their hypothesis.

[–] gibmiser@lemmy.world 29 points 2 years ago

No that's the perfect null hypothesis. They knew it would still be stolen, and this experiment proves it.

[–] nightwatch_admin@feddit.nl 17 points 2 years ago

This comment is a golden shower of joy

[–] themeatbridge@lemmy.world 29 points 2 years ago

How much rat urine you can inject into a watermelon before people notice.

[–] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 13 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I'm sorry, is that supposed to convince me not to eat the watermelon?

I'm convinced that this is the Shredder origin story.

[–] southernbrewer@lemmy.world 11 points 2 years ago

I read this in Cave Johnson's voice.

[–] finkrat@lemmy.world 7 points 2 years ago

Probably facilities cleaning up the food lol, bet it's in the trash