The Onion

6638 readers

1152 users here now

The Onion

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

Great Satire Writing:

founded 3 years ago

MODERATORS

seahorse@midwest.social

pbrisgreat@midwest.social

188

Home Depot Introduces New 12-Foot-Tall Baby Jesus Skeleton (www.theonion.com)

submitted 2 years ago by Five@slrpnk.net to c/theonion@midwest.social

7 comments fedilink hide all child comments

top 7 comments

sorted by: hot top controversial new old

[–] ares35@kbin.social 20 points 2 years ago (1 children)

nails are in aisle 3, lumber is out back.

[–] Kata1yst@kbin.social 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Damn it, I really wanted my sacrilege fully pre-assembled.

Hopefully they have a set of fucking useless piece of shit contractors who can waste my goddamn time for months and go over budget.

[–] Alteon@lemmy.world 6 points 2 years ago

My brother in Christ, you can pick up a hammer and saw at the same facility and do it yourself in a fraction of the time and money. YouTube will show you the way.

[–] HobbitFoot@thelemmy.club 9 points 2 years ago (2 children)

Those skeletons are really going to become the backbone of every holiday's decorations.

[–] otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 2 years ago

Yes please!

Although, the baby Jesus would've been better as an infant zombie, IMHO. 🤌🏼

[–] pdxfed@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

Nailed it!

[–] mx_smith@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

This is so great, we have a house in the neighborhood that got one of those giant skeletons for Halloween several years ago and keeps it up all year while changing the decorations around it. It currently has a Santa hat.