this post was submitted on 23 Nov 2023
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submitted 2 years ago by Masimatutu@mander.xyz to c/memes@lemmy.ml
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alt text

(parodical) YouTube popup:

Going to pee during the ad break violates YouTube's Terms of Service

  • It looks like you selfishly left the room while our ads were playing. Don't you know that by watching youtube you entered a CONTRACT?!
  • We killed the competition by operating at a loss for a decade. We paid good money to be the only game in town.
  • Now that there are no other options, we can start to make that money back however we like. So turn your webcam on so that our advertisers know you're paying attention.

(Two buttons, first one suggested)

Let us program your brain

Foot the bill directly

all 33 comments
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[–] Endorkend@kbin.social 118 points 2 years ago (2 children)

The thing with Google isn't that they removed the "don't be evil" mantra they held for 2 decades.

It's that in the 5 years since officially removing that mantra, they've done their best to be the most cartoonishly evil they can be.

[–] lugal@sopuli.xyz 40 points 2 years ago (1 children)

You make it sound as if they started after they removed the mantra

[–] Endorkend@kbin.social 42 points 2 years ago

Oh no, but they sure as hell went balls to the walls Austin Powers tier cartoonishly evil since then.

[–] Zerush@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 years ago

With "don't be evil" Google means the user.

[–] Dirk@lemmy.ml 86 points 2 years ago (5 children)

Forget YouTube.

Sony owns a patent for a system/concept that needs you to audibly name the company/product the advertisement is for to continue at the end of the advertisement.

https://fortune.com/2013/04/30/sony-patent-is-hilarious-terrifying/

[–] don@lemm.ee 22 points 2 years ago (1 children)

In the center of the pizza, the toppings appear to make a sad face, as if the person who drew the artwork for the patent felt bad about drawing artwork for such a shitty patent idea.

[–] AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.net 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

See, this is the kind of content I love to see deep in comment chains

Edit: though I think you're only one level down from the top - usually I have to go digging farther for gold like this

[–] XEAL@lemm.ee 12 points 2 years ago

Verification cans are coming

[–] Mothra@mander.xyz 6 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Well I suppose AI generated speech will come in handy

[–] Deconceptualist@lemm.ee 7 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Yeah for sure, except the one I set up won't seem to pass verification because every answer might happen to sound exactly like "fuck you" (to Sony) 100,000 times in a row.

[–] Zerush@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)
[–] Dirk@lemmy.ml 1 points 2 years ago

There is no paywall, but thanks.

[–] kadu@lemmy.world 63 points 2 years ago (2 children)

YouTube didn't "kill the competition". They never had to.

All YouTube competitors very quickly faced the issues relating to ingesting, storing and moderating video. The scalability is a nightmare.

[–] vithigar@lemmy.ca 47 points 2 years ago

You're completely correct, but I want to explore it a bit more.

It's not like YouTube didn't also need to do these things, but they had the advantage of being more or less the first to even try, therefore had the fairly substantial benefit of being able to grow gradually as their traffic volume increased from the late 00s into the early 10s.

Any YouTube competitor entering the scene needed to hit the ground running and didn't have the luxury of being able to gradually scale up. They need to match YouTube immediately, or be considered an inferior platform.

YouTube was first, and everyone else needed to play catch-up with a headwind.

[–] someguy3@lemmy.world 23 points 2 years ago

Well YouTube didn't kill the competition, but Google did. When they bought YouTube because it took off and Google videos didn't.

[–] don@lemm.ee 26 points 2 years ago (1 children)

This reminds me of the Black Mirror episode 15 Million Merits

[–] 7u5k3n@lemmy.world 16 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Reminds me of the

drink a verification can

Greentext

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/983/286/ea5.png

[–] don@lemm.ee 10 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

Oh holy fuck there’s a post floating around the lemmies about Sony basically patenting this idea, and the patent artwork shows a guy standing with his hands raised over his head and saying “McDonald’s” in order to speed up an ad holy raging badgerfuck

Edit: found the link to the article

https://fortune.com/2013/04/30/sony-patent-is-hilarious-terrifying/

[–] LillyPip@lemmy.ca 16 points 2 years ago

Fifteen million merits.

[–] Blapoo@lemmy.ml 8 points 2 years ago

Only 1 option: Leave

[–] ILikeBoobies@lemmy.ca 8 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Asking to use your webcam is the least realistic part about this

[–] LittleTransPunk@lemmy.world 2 points 2 years ago

Even though there's a patent out there for standing up and saying the name of company or whatever they're advertising to end the ad

[–] Dave@lemmy.nz 7 points 2 years ago

When Google advertises that if you raise your hand in real life then Google Meet will mark you as having your hand raised, this reality just got a little bit closer.

[–] BolexForSoup@kbin.social 5 points 2 years ago (1 children)

The hands going up when the person stands to say “McDonald’s” is unbelievable

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 5 points 2 years ago

Resume viewimg. Resume viewing. RESUME VIEWING.

[–] SplashJackson@lemmy.ca 4 points 2 years ago

Doesn't sound very nice

[–] Clbull@lemmy.world 4 points 2 years ago

"drink verification can"

[–] Zerush@lemmy.ml 4 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago) (1 children)

Since I use the MotionBox Video Browser I never visited YT anymore, no need of it. In MotionBox I've acces to all videos from YT and almost any other streaming platform, even from front-ends, way faster and without ads, nags or other crap. Love it. Maybe also PokeTube, when I want to download a Video in mp4 or mp3.

[–] Sanyanov@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago (1 children)

Also check out FreeTube. It is more YouTube-focused, but does its job amazingly well and in style.

[–] Zerush@lemmy.ml 2 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I used FreeTube before, but when I started not being able to play some videos blocked by YT, I switched to MotionBox and SMplayer, which play it without problem. FreeTube certainly has a prettier UI, but this is not what matters most to me, but being able to watch the videos I want..

[–] Sanyanov@lemmy.world 1 points 2 years ago

That's valid