I saw this door next to the kitchen this morning. Maybe it was always there but I never really noticed it before and I've been more vigilant lately on account of all the Hamas. I look on the other side of it and there's actually a STAIRWAY going DOWN. Like beneath the earth.

So I'm immediately suspicious. I get my gun and I go down the stairway expecting this to be the whole HQ. It appears to be some kind of supply outpost instead. I see lots of cardboard boxes with markings of different dates and rooms, possibly terror plots that I don't know how to get to the Mossad. There's an exercise station which could provide a jihadist with a full-body workout. Before I ran back upstairs I saw an old bicycle, an extensive pipe network/HVAC system leading somewhere above, and a washing machine. I opened a box marked "kitchen" and it was full of KNIVES and other cooking weapons.

What the fuck is Hamas doing under my house? Do their tunnels stretch to Colorado?

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[–] coeliacmccarthy@hexbear.net 19 points 2 years ago (1 children)

hamas keeps pulling shit out of my ass and into my pants

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 12 points 2 years ago

A couple nights ago I passed out drinking and Hamas pissed my pants. It's disgusting they'd stoop so low.

[–] Magician@hexbear.net 11 points 2 years ago

Schroedinger's House - a thought experiment where a house simultaneously has a Hamas base underneath and nothing underneath until it is bombed. When it is bombed, a Hamas base is found underneath.

[–] Parsani@hexbear.net 10 points 2 years ago (1 children)

I was in something called a "subway" the other day. It appeared to be a large underground complex. No one seemed phased by this. I left immediately.

[–] happybadger@hexbear.net 9 points 2 years ago

Hamas even has underground garages where you can park your car for $10/day except on Saturdays when it's free.

[–] Ho_Chi_Chungus@hexbear.net 9 points 2 years ago

Do their tunnels stretch to Colorado?

Yes, every last square inch of earth, as well as around 40% of the moon and some entrances speculated to lead to Mars

[–] fuzzy@hexbear.net 9 points 2 years ago

better blow it up, just to be sure

[–] FlakesBongler@hexbear.net 7 points 2 years ago

happybadger's home immediately struck with 500 bombs

[–] heartheartbreak@hexbear.net 4 points 2 years ago

It is I just found me in Kampf and "how to be a terrorist for DUMMIES" in your basemenst

[–] Crowtee_Robot@hexbear.net 4 points 2 years ago

You're on hexbear dot net so probably.

[–] ScrewdriverFactoryFactoryProvider@hexbear.net 2 points 2 years ago

I’ve wanted to dig a garden in my back yard but that would make me Hamas

[–] Awoo@hexbear.net 1 points 2 years ago* (last edited 2 years ago)

wrong thread