Is this some kind of modernized take on the 'Dining philosophers problem'?
Guy doesn't need friends to get himself into an deadlock.
this post was submitted on 09 Apr 2026
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I see this is funny as this is just a stupid waste of my time
Can't put the laptop down because he's next to a pool to free up at least one hand.
The best I can advise for him is to chew up the cigar and chase it down with the espresso martini. Then throw the laptop into the sea like a discus and get into the pool to wait for the authorities to charge him with littering.
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The guy may be a poser but this is such a 'I don't drink or smoke' post.
It's a martini glass, you can hold it with your pinkie. It's very easy to smoke and drink with one hand. You can even do it with a full sized glass:
Then, when you want to smoke, you extend the two fingers holding the cigar/cigarette and you can take the end in your mouth. You only need your thumb and two lower fingers to hold the glass.
Also if he's watching a video on the laptop he doesn't need to use the keyboard or mouse
I think what we have here is a case of 'haters gonna hate'.
I'm sure the guy is a douche, based on my complete stereotyping him from one picture, so I'm sure there's something more substantive to criticize him for than 'he's using both of his hands.'
Sigma males don't watch videos though, they create them /s
Eh, you might be able to puff the cigar without hands, depending on your diaphragm/facial strength.
Also, this is apparently possible:
back when talent was still talented \s
Also, if he is watching something on his laptop, he doesn’t need to touch anything.
Speak for yourself
The alpha male, ladies. Can't even unhook a bra strap with one hand because he's too busy holding his laptop and drink. Can't go down on you because he has a cigar which could leave you with a nasty burn. He's also absent-minded, and didn't remember to wear a shirt. Look out! What's that on his head?! Oh, wait. It's his hair.
Shouldn't he have a catboy in a maid outfit holding his drink/laptop for him?
What's the point of having that torso if you're not pulling catboys in maid outfits?
Seriously, why go to the effort?
One can be asexual and still appreciate catboys in maid outfits so there is no excuse!
What's an "Instagram growth guru?"
Wake up 4 in the morning, go for a run, and then to the gym. Don't eat breakfast or lunch because that just interrupts your nonstop hustle. That sort of thing.
I don't get the grind mindset at all - look at me! Be like me! Bust ass 24/7, hustle hustle hustle, sleep is for losers, carbs are for losers, relationships that aren't profitable are for losers...... it's all worth it though so you can be on vacation in some exotic place like me!!!........... (and not even be able to put work down for one second to enjoy your fucking drink and be oblivious of the views you worked for) Like who thinks this sounds awesome except 15 year old boys?
Relevant song from 2007, Hussel by M.I.A.:
We do it cheap hide our money in a heap
Send it home and make em study
Fixing teeth, I got family, a friend in need
A hand to throw the gasoline
A mobile phone hooked up to the scene
Hello my frind yes it's me
Dont be scared there's somethin going on
Im gettin money since I grown
Could be dash go out and hussel em
But I hate money coz it makes me numbHussel hussel hussel
Grind grind grind
Why has everyone got hussel on their mind?Hussel hussel hussel
Grind grind grind
Why has everyone got hussel on their mind?[AFRIKAN BOY]
You think its tough now,
Come to africa,
Out there we are grinding like pepper,
You can catch me on the motorway,
Selling sugar water and pepper,
I rep Africa not Miami,
Hustle hustle with m.i.a,
I'm broke I've got indefinite stay,
You can't touch me like leprosy,
I hustle tough from here to sri lanka,
My mum told me to be an accountant,
Bun that I wanna work in a corner shop,
Contact sugu he's got the contacts mayne,
I'm illegal I don't pay tax tax,
EMA yes I'm claiming that that,
Police I try to avoid them,
They catch me hustling they say deport them,Hussel hussel hussel [2x]
Grind grind grind
Why has everyone got hussel on their mind?Hello my friend, hello my friend
Yes it's me
4 by 3 ,3 buy 3 , buy 1 song get 1 free
Maybe me, a bootleg cd colour tv or dvd
We got barrels in the sea
Its big enough to take a whole family
We drum on it
Jun cha cha gegujun cha
Jun cha cha gegujun chaCome sit by me, let me tell u we
Don't do bling but we do white tee
Up some jungle up some tree
One second , my phones ringing
Its my friend habibi
He then went drop called me
Cheap moroccan got no credit than me
Ya'll got less credit than me
I keep that tab at a shop like a gee
Coz without me there'll be no chocolate hersheyHussel hussel hussel [6x]
Grind grind grind
Why has everyone got hussel on their mind?
Now it'll be in my head all morning lol
That’s literally the target demographic. You answered your own question.
5 years ago I would have agreed with you but I now know several adult men in this sphere...
Some would argue they are still 15yo boys in mindset.
Ha! I stopped at 12 and avoided that shit.
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Awww, they're growing up!
Last I heard, everyone is twelve.
Fuck, that knowyourmeme page has some funny examples
carbs are for losers
No one who actually works out properly say this, it's the exact opposite. You need a ton of carbs if you work out
Idk, I work out a lot and have done pretty well on low carb. I would gas if I did, like, a crossfit workout. But my top end power and all day endurance were the same or better, and I had some really cut abs.
For myself, I found there was really no downside. Except no beer and pizza. So not worth it.
Sounds like you are a beginner or intermediate and never did a real bulk before. Once you reach a certain FFMI you can't really build more muscle mass without carbs
I've certainly never done a real bulk before. But I mostly train for strength, not hypertrophy, since my goal is rock climbing, not bodybuilding. So my reps in any of the big lifts have almost never gone over about 5
Andrew Tate basically crystalized this whole thing... by pretending he was Morpheus from the Matrix.
His solution to 'escape the Matrix'... was to be the most diehard bluepill imaginable.
Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.
to be the most diehard bluepill imaginable
The low quality of this gif combined with me never watching the Matrix left me confused for a little bit
Pretending they're Morpheus when they're all just Cyphers.
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'round here we call them "fucking posers".
You don't need hands to smoke a cigar that's already lit and in your mouth. And if you're really talented, you can still drink with the cigar in your mouth and type on the laptop with your penis.
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He can defintely still drink through the other side of his mouth. He can also puff and chuff on the cigar without his hands. His laptop is all voice activated and he's trained it to understand his slurred and mumbled speech.
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Taskmaxxing
You can hold the cigar with a forefinger and drink.
Just as messed up that this guy is apparently on vacation yet needs to be available on his work laptop. Has to be an American.
Heh. Explains why he couldn't put a shirt on. The real mystery though are the pants.
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