This was the first week in like a month I wasn't still at the desk at midnight at least once. Celebrating with some wine and culinary class masters on Netflix. Feel like I can actually relax finally for a bit
this post was submitted on 09 Apr 2026
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First real wrangling of the beast⦠I got him to come over for food then scooped him into my crouching lap and dripped the pill crushed with water into his mouth the same way I used to with Melbcat.
No hissing or scratching but his squirming and fighting was frantic. Feel bad that I restrained him until heβd had it all before I let him go. He ran away and looked back a couple of times while I was apologetically calling but disappeared into the night utterly disgusted with me. I hope it hasnβt lost the trust I built up. Iβm meant to do this every day π
But what am I supposed to do? Canβt let him be a scabby boy. No fosters want a ringworm cat because it would spread to their other healthy ones, and to have a separate ringworm section Iβd have to surrender him to a no kill shelter. I canβt see him doing well there even if they accepted him.
Iβm so shitty I returned Melbcatβs unused meds because one of them was a very effective anti-anxiety medication. It could really have helped me with this. I might have to try him on Zylkene to see if it helps him adjust to all this.
spoiler
I also called Griefline earlier because Iβm missing my baby girl so much. This new crisis is overshadowing her but her loss is seeping through. In the quiet times I have Iβm remembering her and holding her urn and really going through it. I wish I had the opportunity to slow down and deal with things.
Fuck my feet hurt.
Iβd entirely forgotten that Sovereign Hill had hills
Thank you for the birthday wishes! It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :3
Mickey has been treated like the Monarch he is, he is now sleeping in his Pondering Orb (I think).
Apropos of nothing, but Abracadabra by Steve Miller Band slaps π
Edit:
the pondering continues
Oh, also I have a free birthday drink waiting for me at Inner North Brewery. I shall be attending tomorrow, if anyone would like to come along :) I should be there around 3:30-4pm :)
ruminating
Unfortunately, I struggle a lot with getting things done. Even just eating three meals a day and exercising. Apparently it's AuDHD but who knows. The psychiatrist is too expensive so I will be waiting until I get time off uni to work more and save up.
It is time to believe in myself a bit more. I was considering starting guitar from scratch because I have an all-or-nothing mindset and my teacher gave me this great idea of doing "practise sprints", short, timed bursts of practise. So now I am also doing tidy sprints, and uni work sprints. I haven't picked up the guitar this week because I'm too scared π but I have done more piano than I did last week. I think that counts for something.
I keep telling myself that I can't do uni or teaching because I am incapable and it's not for me. I see my classmates doing really well and think that because I get overwhelmed so easily and have less life experience, I will fail. Again, that is very all-or-nothing. I haven't given anything a good go in my life, always quitting before persisting. I guess I'll do an experiment on myself and see if I feel better about things when I give them a good go, or if I actually don't want my life to head in this direction.
All I know is that I am sick of not achieving things and I need a sense of mastery in my life.
you have finished lots of things, you did your uni degrees π So you can finish things
everything else is not a continuation of this but are new tasks , often requiring new skills and different personal attributes
also, change is not failure π
you can do this π
I have procured great bounty from the Sovereign Hill sweet shop. Raspberry drops for everyone!
delicious, thank you π
Oooh yummy! I love raspberry drops. I recollect that the Sov Hill bullseyes are particularly fine too. Is this still so? As it's been a good few years since I last went there.
I've gone raspberry, blackcurrant, acid drops and butterballs. Will report back
c'mon, just a few days without rain so my lawn can dry out enough to mow
Update of the flagship chilli tree:
lol
gonna have to stake that.
Lots of fruit too I see. Impressive.
think I'll put a warm jumper and hat on and go to the beach after lunch πjust for a short walk
My sleep in was interrupted by my anti-sads regulating my circadian rhythm, sigh. But it's my birthday so a wake and bake is in order methinks yolo
I was actually born on a Friday, so it's very satisfying when my birthday falls on it again - activates some small reward centre in my brain.
obligatory cat tax
Happy birthday owner of Mickey, how are you going to treat him on this special day?
Happy birthday!!! π₯°
Happy Birthday!
Happy birthday, Spud!!!
Happy birthday, birthday neighbour
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday!!
Hoppy birdday Spud! And a special cuddle for Mickey and another one for your bloke.
Happy Birthday Spud!
ππΉπ
Happy b'dayyy!
Happy birthday π
Happy Birthday ππΎπ₯
Girlfriend took me to Farm Vigano yesterday for my birthday. Good food and a great location, but the highlight of going there is getting to see Am A Bell Crabb again:
Am A Bell Crabb
Happy belated birthday β€οΈ
DR not happy with my test results. I have some new medication to take and some follow ups to do. π¬
Never mind it happens. My man is on BP pills for life and he's fit. Sometimes it's lifestyle. Sometimes it's genetic. Sometimes it's both. You can dm me if you wanna talk.
I've been on BP pills for years now. It's 100% genetic. It was high when I was unfit and barely improved after losing weight and getting fitter.
I could have 3 coffees and have normal BP, and some days, it's high because it wants to be.
Wow. My husband lost about 20 kgs. Went from the highest dosage to now the lowest. He was having frequent migraines and now has none.
I've never actually had any symptoms apart from the BP itself. I'm on a low dose and it's working well.
To be fair, my BP was on the low end of 'high'.
Interestingly my mum has low blood pressure and takes meds for it.
Tbh my lifestyle probably isn't helping either π€£
Well I have seen your breakfast choices. You do love a salty nood or two.
You got this! β€οΈ
spoiler
Cat was going to be taken last night or this morning but no foster place has been found yet. I agreed to give him the ringworm meds while the rescuer keeps looking. It puts off the difficult moment but drags out the guilt and uncertainty :(
Edit: Now the crazy neighbour has seen him with me and asked if itβs my cat. Heβs at risk now. And he wonβt take his pills.
Its ok..you have done the right thing
Apparently there is a seal lying on the highway at Mccrae - it's blocking traffic and motorists have been advised to avoid the area. It's the main road parallel to the beach ...
Hi all :) I'm going to plug a gig I'm organising to celebrate the launch of my album. I feel a bit self promo-y doin this, but thought some may be interested. https://events.humanitix.com/fehlbergo-album-launch Thurs April 23rd, Bar 303 Northcote. (Tix are $11.50, but if you wanna go and you're strapped for cash just send me a message and we'll sort it out :)
Sounds fun. Link to previous music?
It's only on Bandcamp and Soundcloud, but you can stream it free and accountless on both :) https://fehlbergo.bandcamp.com/album/luv-c
https://on.soundcloud.com/2yVZ4QQouUmdCUErmi
It will be real fun! Jan and Babysitter bands are supporting, so a good night of wholesome and authentic music.
Ooooooooo northcote not far from me. You may see me there :3
I am starting to seriously look at buying a house, however my enthusiasm for the process is about on a par with going to the dentist. I wish I could just pick a house out of an online catalogue and skip all of the tedious looking/inspecting/negotiating bit.
Greetings from Ballarat!
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