Step one to fixing printer: shoot printer Step two: take to library, print there.
this post was submitted on 06 Apr 2026
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I have never met a printer that wants to do its job
PLEASE SIGN IN TO YOUR HP ACCOUNT TO CONTINUE
DRINK VERIFICATION TONER CARTRIDGE
Get yourself a thermal printer for 100$. Suits 95% of my needs. No more, "fuck you I won't print in black, you're low on red".
Brother laser printers were the thing, but I have heard this has changed in the last two or three years.
Doesn't thermal ink basically fall off the paper in a few weeks? At least receipts and such fade pretty quickly.
Most thermal paper isn't recyclable though, the chemicals that allow the heat to print onto them can't be easily recycled. A simple Brother laser printer would be a better option for most people if they're just printing black text
I actually did not know that. Apparently there's some eco-friendly thermal paper, I'm gonna look into this. Thanks for pointing it out.
Glad I could help 🤝
Can you please explain this to my frugal Asian parents who only care about the price of the printer?
Nah nvm, your words are just gonna come out the other side of the ears lmfao
Would they be down with a second hand printer? I found a $650 Brother multifunction at Goodwill for $10 that looked brand new, just needed a new toner cartridge.
It was to replace a nearly 20 year old Brother that still works via USB, but the NIC died.
If you know what to look for, it's not hard to find good ones.
A lot of goodwills wont take printers, because the local salvage/dump reasonably charges disposal fees that make them uneconomical if they dont sell.
Same thing happens with compressors. Its why you dont see as many ACs/dehumidifers/fridges anymore. Costs too much to dispose of them when they dont sell.
They'll take them if you don't trip the bell and leave before they notice you. With that trick they'll even take your old CRTs!
Do they actually make these for full 8.5 x 11 pages?
I've only seen them for receipts and labels
Oh yeah it does. Rolls a really cheap, I use that most of the time. Regular flat paper is a bit more expensive, I use it only for important stuff. The printer is really small too, easy to put in your bag. I'm sure there's a lot of brands but the one I got is Phonemo M32 I think.
Thermal? You mean laser? With a fuser?
Ha! I am a programmer that wrote printer software for 20 years. I get to live.
Did you also write the software that checks if the ink is counterfeit and bricks the entire printer? If so, I'm a big fan of yours and would like to meet you in person. Please DM me your name and address.
"get"
But do you want to?
Yes?
You also get to refill ink and remove crumpled paper with staples from the printer. Since, you know, you're the printer person.
What does paper jam taste like?
Slightly better than traffic jam
But technically I can repair the printer...
Yeah, the joke doesn't really work, does it? Any decent programmer will have a better shot at fixing a printer, because any decent programmer is good at finding information on the internet and then following the instructions.
Programmers complain about this situation because once people know that we use the computers, they expect us to fix everything for them for free. So, it's just annoying. But I wouldn't sacrifice my life to avoid a minor annoyance, so the joke doesn't really work.
If you're a programmer that doesn't generally know how to find instructions to fix things like printers on the internet and then follow them, then I'm on the side of the guy who wants to shoot them.
I can find the instructions and am still on team shoot the printer. I have one working printer in the house (it connects to the switch) and if you can't print to it you can't print. We have three PCs that can do it so figure it out yourself, as resident IT I'm not figuring out any more printing.
I organized our network's printers into a print server, then wrote scripts to deploy them using a simple CLI tool. When printers break, I google it and order the part. Beyond that there is no more chaos, no more walking to workstations to troubleshoot. I am not a programmer, just an automation-focused sysadmin. Who ALWAYS gets assigned the bloody printers, because I'm too nice.
What movie is this from?
The Pianist (2002)
Incredible movie everyone should see. Heavily based on stories from the real Szpilman, who died just before the movie released I think, but helped them with it I'm pretty sure. Shows the true realities that Jews went through in Poland.
A damn shame the movie was made by a giant piece of shit.
They played this movie in my middle school classroom... I was kinda half distracted
This is me every single time I go to my Mother-in-law's house
I actually gifted my parents a 15 year old brother laser and told them to just plug in your laptop.
My brother printer is constant frustration. We are able, brother is cain.
Huh. Laser or ink?
it aint easy but somebody gotta do it