Aught to make for a fun April fools day.
this post was submitted on 31 Mar 2026
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he can start by targetting the datacenters.
That could be a huge double edged sword.
On the one hand less propaganda, on the other less documentation.
Going to be checking Google maps for the Gulf of ~~America~~ Iran in the morning.
Oh no. Please. Not NVidia, or Meta, or Amazon, or Google, or Apple, or Palantir... Oh and don't forget... Uh, I mean not Mircosoft.
Microsoft is a huge liability. They've forced companies and home PC users to be needlessly dependent on their cloud services to be able to do just about anything. They own the hugely popular GitHub and NPM developer platforms, and indirectly control other developer platforms through GitHub integrations. They're one of the major cloud service providers. They have a system that forces home and small business PCs all over the world to execute arbitrary code. They've been replacing their developers with incompetent AI systems. A major Apple or Google attack has the potential to break nearly all mobile devices, but a major Microsoft attack could cripple businesses everywhere.
Facebook and Palantir on the other hand could just disappear off the internet and we'd be better off.
I concur, please levea the big tech alone, they are doing so much good for the world, cogh cogh, I meant for shareholders.
X. Surely X is a Tech company. Tesla too. They are as much tech as automobile.
All EV manufacturers are as much tech as automobile today, I would argue.
“Residents within a one-kilometer radius of these terrorist companies across all countries in the region are also urged to evacuate and move to safe locations.”
Americans: "The fuck is a 'kilometer'?"
Also Americans: "The fuck is a 'radius'?"
Also Americans: "Move?! You fascist! I'm tired of being harrassed by the fitness movement! I have the Constitutionally-protected right to sit and remain passive, you woke Communist Socialist!"
There'll be like two actual Americans there, but the rest of the workforce won't explain it to them because they're sick of everything being compared to "back home" all the time.
Please do it
no don't do it
So people will think the news about it are april 1 jokes. Pure genius
US: "You won't attack us." Iran: "April fools bitches."
April 1 - “lol check out this silly thing that Google maps is doing!”
April 2 - ( ˶°ㅁ°)
Its fair game I guess.
Offices in the middle east, in case you’re like me and thought they were talking about stateside offices.
I thought they were talking about cyber attacks, which honestly would put much more pressure on the US government I think.
On April Fools Day? I’m expecting mild pranks, like TP’ing Bezo’s house, ding-dong-dash a Elon’s, and maybe a few car bombs at the data centers.
Don't threaten me with a good time
Yet another really good reason to work from home.
If Oracle was on the list, they'd tell their employees to come into the office anyway.
they just cut 30k employees, freeing up money for more data-centers.
it is considered rude to show ai slop to other humans
Well all but about 30k of them
Dodged a bullet
most likely a bomb
No more water for you for the rest of the week
Probably ask them to stand in front of the building.
Iran could win the hearts and minds of americans by feeding bezos shahed for breakfast.
Many U.S. tech companies have offices in Jerusalem, Tel Aviv, and Abu Dhabi, which could become targets of Iranian drone and missile attacks if the country follows through on its threat.
Microsoft has offices in Qatar, Dubai, SA, Bahrain, Oman, Kuwait, and more I'm sure. Oracle also has offices across the region.
These come to mind, but there are many other companies I'm sure.
How difficult would it be to smuggle and assemble a variant of the Shahed drone into North America? Dissembled and separated, it would look like lawn mower parts, sheet metal, and ewaste.
Actually this might be the best news I’ve ever heard come out of that country
April Fools! 
Iran could really fracture the country if it chooses it's target strategically
they seem to be doing a good job in the middle east, targeting other ME countries had made them question thier reliability form the USA, they saw no protection/or retribution against IRan once thier missles start targeting oil infrastructure.
Do it, I dare you. Seriously though, take them down because our government won’t.
Simply put folks.Leavre San Francisco and move to Santa Rosa. (I know that is bigger than 1km Radius from Silicon Valley. But Honestly I think the Ports through out the bay to be targeted as well to increase the damages)
The assets they have in the middle east, not on american soil.