Ask Lemmy

Most recently? I was in a car with someone I don’t like and they pulled a douchebag move skipping a bunch of traffic to make an illegal turn, while running a red light no less. Obviously I was like wtf if your problem cause it was an asshole move but also endangered me. This bitch really said it was fine because no one tried to stop him. We are in a car remind you so I’m like wtf does that even mean, how could the other drivers have stopped you? By like, crashing into you to prevent you from doing that? And he said YES!!! What?? So unless you’re willing to physically intervene on what this dude is doing whatever he does isn’t bothering you… he’s said a lot of other crazy shit of this nature but this was the most recent.

I am crippled and don't get out much these days...

... but I do remember having to actually explain to a 20ish yo woman that no, chocolate milk does not infact come from brown cows.

Most of the conversation was me assuming she was fucking with me.

Nope. She was dead serious.

PERSONAL STORIES ONLY, DO NOT INCLUDE A STATEMENT FROM A CELEBRITY OR POLITICIAN

Because that would be cheating. Celebs and politicians--especially politicians--say some jaw dropping bullshit pretty much every single day rn. 🤣

"Give us what we want and everything will go back to normal" My father after my mom got pissed at me for not calling her more often and caused a massive family drama. IIRC my mom lost her shit when I asked her to call me sometimes.

I'm traveling through Portugal at the moment, and an Australian guy struck up a conversation with me on the train yesterday. He and I start talking politics, and he starts talking about how illegal immigration is a massive problem. He's supportive of mass deportation, and generally likes how Trump is handling things. We debate this back and forth, and then move on to other subjects.

Later in the conversation he reveals, without a hint of irony, that his visa in Portugal has expired while waiting on residence paperwork. I just stare at him for a moment, and then ask him if he realized he was an illegal immigrant. He doesn't really see the irony. Absolutely stunned.

I have 2 from the same person.

1. "Why is it when hockey players stop on the blue and red line. The lines dont disappear".

2. "The reason why there are train conductors is because they turn the wheel at the front of the train so they dont fly off the tracks on corners".

Maybe not as crazy as some but it definitely made me think twice about other things she knew.

"I am very sure my husband has no heart attack. I am a homeopathic and this is clearly not a heart attack. You don't know what you are doing."

I am a paramedic for 24 years, a critical care paramedic for 16. The husband had such a "myocardial infarction out of the book"-ECG it almost looked twice. He literally almost coded on us twice. And this lady walzes in (funny enough: They were in the process of separating) and after 60 sec. decides she knows what's up.

Homeopathy therapists here have no formal training. Just a state exam that makes sure they don't kill someone too often.

The husband barely made it,personally I think mostly out of spite for her. Had a cardiac arrest twice while in the cathlab,but survived without neurological issues.

It's really really rare that I am out of words and don't have a comeback. But that woman in that moment?

(For the medical folks: Massive STEMI accross 3 leads, massive contractility issue visible on POCUS, later on become pressure dependended, had VF arrest during PCI, needed an impella for two weeks)

I was helping a co-worker with their broken phone. Just saving the pictures from their phone to the computer.

Me: 'OK, I'm just going to make a folder on the desktop for now. You can move it from there to wherever you want to keep them'

Co-worker: 'I don't think I have a desktop'

Maybe unrealated, but they are also the most pro-AI of my coworkers. Open to just asking chat gpt for worksheets for thier students...

I need to start by stating the fact that I have a perfectly normal nose in a perfectly normal face. At 18 I was a pretty young woman.

Ages ago, first day in university, first lecture. 400 students listening to the professor. A random girl is staring at me for most of the lecture. Afterwards she runs through the crowd in the hallway, catches up to me and says: "Just had to tell you that you rock. You're an inspiration to me. Looking so happy and carefree, with that nose of yours! I don't know how you manage."

10 years ago I gave my ex a shaving kit. It came with a dry shaving foam, one of those that work like soap. After a couple of weeks without using I asked him if it was bad to shave, he said "the guy scamed you, this don't make foam" I was intrigued got the shaving brush WET IT And used the SOAP like dry foam. Worked fine

His answer "I didn't know I need water to make foam"

Mind you I'm not talking about any dumb person, this man got his bachelors in economics and business at the same time. He had 2 masters and a doctorate. He was very inteligente and was a great person to talk.

I think we god divorced because of how much I made fun of him for that, but for gods sake, WATER AND SOAP = FOAM is elementary school shit

"I had my whole life planed out." "And then I had you." Great thing to hear a mother say.

Had a neighbor who thought bunnies laid eggs. I guess because of the whole Easter Bunny thing.