this post was submitted on 30 Mar 2026
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[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 5 points 23 hours ago

The most striking thing I ever read on aging:

From a geriatric,

Life is kind of like taking a nice long shower. When you're young, it feels good and invigorating. But as you get older, it's like they just keep turning down the hot water until there's nothing good about it anymore, but you're still now allowed to get out.

My mother was in her 70's, diabetes, bad stroke in her 50's, heart problems, kidney problems creeping in. She had been in the ER life or death quite a few times. Hearing was marginal, vision was marginal, most of her diet needed to be bland and blended smooth.

"If I go in again and they need to do something to save me, just let me go, promise me that, I'm miserable all the time and there's nothing left they can do for me to make it any better."

[–] BurnedDonutHole@ani.social 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Well I remember my friend's grandfather. He was over 90 and he was having health problems. They were taking him to emergency even though he didn't wanted. One day I helped him out of the car after another emergency visit, asked him how he is... He spit on the ground and said "I couldn't fucking die today either!". I was young so, it was weird for me. After all these years I understand him now. I'm not a believer but I hope he is resting in peace.

[–] osanna@lemmy.vg 10 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (1 children)

i know the feeling. My grandma lived until she was abotu 97 or 98. I think she wanted nothing more than to die. She was in constant pain, tired of being alive etc.

There was a biologist here in australia before VAD was passed who went to europe to die, because they had VAD. I forget his name, but australia now has VAD under very specific criteria. *: found it: https://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-44069885

I'm only middle aged, and I've wanted to die since i was a teenager. Shit fucking sucks.

[–] osanna@lemmy.vg 7 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Honestly, I think VAD should be available for EVERYONE, not just if you're terminally ill. Why should i have to live this stupid shitty life because it will upset someone? I don't really even have anyone. It's just me and my cats. They would find a new home. But i have to live this shitty life because.... no one will be upset? Fuck this shit.

I have a myriad of mental health issues. Why can't i die because my life fucking sucks balls? Why should i have to live my life because, uhh.... no one... will be upset? I'm afraid to do it myself again, because i could make shit even fucking worse. Why can't I have VAD?

[–] JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

What is the "V" in V Assisted Death? I can't figure out what the V means.

[–] Buddahriffic@lemmy.world 2 points 23 hours ago (1 children)

Probably voluntary or something similar implying consent.

[–] osanna@lemmy.vg 1 points 14 hours ago

Yup. It’s “voluntary”

[–] LwL@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

Yeah, should be some scheduled thing with maybe a few therapy sessions or something first (so people don't just do it from a random shitty day), but it really doesn't have to be your problem that others would rather you live. Unless you have kids still depending on you, because that's someone you're actually responsible for.

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 27 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

120 is my goal. I want to be able to say i can remember the 1900s, 2000s and see what 2100 looks like.

Ain't doing it without scientific help, but there is very very small chance I could get there.

Yes younglings, I remember a time when the internet didn't exist!

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (2 children)
[–] BeardedBlaze@lemmy.world 2 points 22 hours ago

My grandparents are in their 90s, and still are active. They only stopped skiing in their mid 80s. Genetics plus life choices I suppose.

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Yes. I watched my grandmother slide from the strongest person in our family into a barely recognizable shell as she would have me come sit with her and i would have to tell her repeatedly in 5 minute increments that her brain was a asshole and there's nothing she can do but eat well, take care of herself. It didn't matter to the dementia she had. When she was sitting in bed crying on my shoulder telling me that all her friends are dead, she can't remember simple things and so many other batshit crazy things I can't even remember, and all the while, everyday for about 10 years I woke up to check and see if she was a corpse that day.

I'm well well well aware of what 90 can look like.

[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago (2 children)

and you still want to go to 120? you are far, far braver than i. 85 is where i tap out

[–] Jarix@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Look at Dick Van Dyke. Over a 100 and still dancing

I'm gonna see where I am at 85 and decide then. I know some 85 year olds that are still basically completely all there, and some of them gave genetics to me so I'm optimistic

Yes please. I'd really like to see more of my kids' lives, and grandchildren + great-grandchildren if so blessed one day.

[–] pedz@lemmy.ca 75 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yeah. My grandmother is in that situation. She is a grandmother to me but she's a great great grandmother for some of my family.

She moved in a nursing home more than a decade ago expecting to be there for a few years but she's now 98, losing eyesight, hearing and mobility, and hopes it will end at some point. When she caught covid we thought she might have got what she wanted, but no.

[–] neukenindekeuken@sh.itjust.works 34 points 1 day ago (1 children)

That's horrible. Should be a humane way to move on.

[–] pedz@lemmy.ca 29 points 1 day ago (1 children)

She is trying to get medical assistance in dying, which is possible here under certain conditions, but just not for people in her case. She's a Catholic so, well... she's praying.

Man, my heart goes out to you brother. That's a tough spot for her, and you to be in. I hope you hang in there with her until the end so she knows there's at least someone in the family who was sad to finally see her go.

And fingers crossed the state or country or similar grants an exception in her case. Best of luck friend.

[–] AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world 43 points 2 days ago

Reminds me of an old Nick Swardson joke.

"How are you doing grandma?" "Well I woke up again.. and all of my friends are dead."

[–] Iusedtobeanalien@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago (1 children)

In the bible Methuselah loved till 939 years old

Can you imagine how fed up he was getting out of bed in the morning

Every day would be ground hog day

[–] JennaR8r@lemmy.dbzer0.com 2 points 23 hours ago

Who did he love for 939 years? That's solid relationship stability.

[–] bonenode@piefed.social 48 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Obligatory age research finding: those 100+ year olds may not be 100+ years old after all.

[–] nymnympseudonym@piefed.social 28 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Yes but, the effect of those earlier records is now completely died down (so to speak). Per PBS, Pew research , and the US Census

  • In 1950 there were about 15 centarians per million people

  • In 2000, there were about 50,000 centarians per million people

  • In 2010, there were 53,364

  • In 2020, there were 80,139

  • In 2024, about 101,000

image

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 10 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Wonder why the drop around 2010.

At first I thought Covid until I looked more closely at the labels on the x axis.

Maybe it was the fema camps. Thanks Obama?

That was just slightly after the housing bubble crisis from 2008. Maybe that’s related.

Edit: oh right it’s percentage of population. Maybe there were more births?

[–] Frostbeard@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

They changed the IG noble since I last looked. Used to be "BS useless" stuff like the airodynamics in grains of rice. (Ofc now someone will link a PubMed article stating that this research holds the key to a universal cure for cancer)

The 100+ years old in Norway can usually back the claim up by pretty scrupulous documentation. Not surprising that there is some shady pension scam going in south Italy tbh.

[–] DarrinBrunner@lemmy.world 21 points 1 day ago (3 children)

Take care of yourself and your older years don't need to be shitty. Look at Dick Van Dyke. I know you'll say "but he has money", and that's certainly part of it, but he also kept dancing and exercising, and didn't abuse his body with drugs and shitty food.

The best time to clean up your diet, reject drugs and alcohol, and start exercising is when you're a teen. The second best time is right now. No one can do it for you.

Obviously, this doesn't work for everyone, there are always exceptions.

[–] FudgyMcTubbs@lemmy.world 1 points 23 hours ago

Um...DVanD was a heavy smoker and is a recovered alcoholic.

"In 1972, the beloved actor checked into a hospital to address his alcoholism. While on his path to sobriety, he also combatted his smoking habits, but admitted in 2023 that trying to quit smoking was 'twice as hard.'"

https://people.com/dick-van-dyke-made-it-100-by-giving-up-alcohol-and-cigarettes-11862068

[–] lobut@lemmy.ca 6 points 1 day ago

I'm in my forties and going back to the gym with my friends. About a month into it now. It's nice hanging out with my friends, but it's good to do with it without drinking or playing video games. I feel better knowing that I'd typically just be lying down on the couch at home.

[–] zout@fedia.io 8 points 1 day ago

The best time to clean up your diet, reject drugs and alcohol, and start exercising is when you're a teen.

Even if you don't live to be a hundred years old, it'll sure feel like you did! /s

[–] Naich@piefed.world 33 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Genuinely scary to think that I might only be 50% of the way through my life. I was looking forward to a nice rest.

[–] TheFriendlyDickhead@feddit.org 23 points 2 days ago (1 children)

The different kind of midlife crisis

[–] aeronmelon@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

Mid-century crisis.

[–] nymnympseudonym@piefed.social 8 points 2 days ago (2 children)

How did it feel before you were born?

After you die, it's like that again.

[–] drosophila@lemmy.blahaj.zone 7 points 1 day ago

It was like that for billions of years and it didn't bother me in the least.

[–] TachyonTele@piefed.social 5 points 1 day ago

Sounds nice to me

[–] derry@midwest.social 12 points 2 days ago (3 children)

My father rn, only in his late eighties. Slowly letting himself die, won't do anything to help himself or let us help him except bring food and wine and do his shopping. Literally ran out of tp and used paper towels instead of going out and buying some. And he can drive and get around but won't for most basic shit. Fucking tiring shit

[–] MelodiousFunk@slrpnk.net 14 points 2 days ago

late eighties

tiring shit

Yeah I'd be done too.

[–] village604@adultswim.fan 6 points 2 days ago

My FIL was like that, but she had cut the toxic cord well before he passively killed himself.

Unfortunately he ended up dying on Valentine's Day which really soured the holiday for a while.

[–] CentipedeFarrier@piefed.social 3 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

My dad too, same thing. Only out of bed for a few hours a day, not because he can’t, because he won’t. Except I think he’s still in his 70s.. Borderline to hit 80s tho

[–] hanrahan@slrpnk.net 5 points 1 day ago

i read an interesting post under a Who live video a couple years ago, Roger Daltry was 78 or thereabouts, singing on stage and dancing about and someone was commenting "he's the same age as my grandfather, who can barely shuffle down the hallway in slippers"

I'm 60 ...sigh.

[–] schwim@piefed.zip 12 points 2 days ago

I will be legitimately upset if I make it past the world average, much less 40 years past that.

[–] Kolanaki@pawb.social 7 points 2 days ago (2 children)

You might be immortal. The only way you'd find out you're not is if you die.

[–] arrow74@lemmy.zip 3 points 1 day ago

Gos this would be the worst kind of immorality Continuing to age, but never dying

[–] The_Picard_Maneuver@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

According to John Mayer, "I am invincible as long as I'm alive"

[–] nymnympseudonym@piefed.social 9 points 2 days ago (1 children)

"Some men achieve immortality through their work.

Some men achieve immortality through their children.

I want to achieve immortality through Not Dying."

-Woody Allen

[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 days ago

I achieved immortality through some rather embarrassing news articles that still show up in search results.