this post was submitted on 20 Mar 2026
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Programmer Humor

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[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 145 points 1 week ago (4 children)

That's VGA, it's gonna be fine. Most wires are either ground or not used for actual image data. R, G and B are analog so noise on those just makes the output noisy, no big deal. That leaves us with HSync and VSync. They are digital signals with 3.3V between on and off and only a single pulse per line / frame so they're also pretty robust against noise.

So unless you're going for an extremely high resolution on a really cheap monitor over a long distance, the worst that will happen is that your image will look grainy like TV static. It would take quite a bit of interference before the sync signals degrade enough to not get any image at all.

[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 82 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Now I wonder if I can route VGA through unusual items. Cutlery, the railing on a staircase, swords, something like that. As long as I can find six pieces of metal of roughly equal length, it should work.

[–] WesternInfidels@feddit.online 98 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Q: So do you have any hobbies?

A: Well lately I've really gotten interested in routing VGA through unusual items!

Q: Ooooh, that's so hot right now

[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 27 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Well... I don't think it would be the weirdest thing I've done with my free time. Would probably barely rank in the top three.

[–] buffing_lecturer@leminal.space 22 points 1 week ago (1 children)
[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 44 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (4 children)

Let's see:

  • Back in 2007 or 2008 I attempted to create a CPU architecture that directly uses Brainfuck as its instruction set. I had to put it on hold before it was completed because I had a custom FPGA development board with really bad documentation but if I ever get my hands on an affordable FPGA, it will get done eventually.
  • I've created a nonogram that solves to a rickroll QR code. I had to rely on the error correction because the exact pattern didn't result in a well-defined solution but I've recently learned about some more parameters that you can tweak on a QR code. So now I just need to acquire or more likely build a QR code generator that lets me manually control those parameters and an automatic nonogram solver so I don't have to manually solve a bunch of 25x25 nonograms to confirm they have a single solution.
  • My plan for tonight is to start porting a 22-year-old handheld game to a ~35-year-old home console. I've acquired a C compiler but will probably have to learn assembly for a CPU architecture that was barely used for anything else. There is no chance to ever share the resulting game without getting sued to hell and back again.
  • I've made chainmail bikinis for a couple of friends.
  • Edit: One more because it might be my magnum opus. Have you ever played KJumpingCube? That doesn't only work on grids but on arbitrary graphs. My friends and I chose a Risk board. Not a digital one. A real life physical Risk board with actual dice on every country that need to be turned by hand. A single game took us about 6-7 hours with the winning move alone taking up the last hour.

That's just what I comes to mind at the moment. I'm sure if I spend some time thinking or digging around old hard drives, I can find more.

[–] Jesus_666@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (1 children)

Jumping Cubes is the kind of game that works really well on a PC and has super simple rules but is absolute hell in real life.

That game on the Risk board was fun, though. IIRC North America in particular tended to have those terrible chain reactions that just kept going and going.

[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 4 points 1 week ago

I remember that Australia was the exact opposite. It has a single outside connection and once it reaches a stable state, it stays there. Every impulse that goes in will come out again and leave the inside unchanged.

[–] stingpie@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

I've been working on developing a CPU architecture based around my own variant of lisp called "dollhouse lisp" the big twist is that DHlisp executes code by reducing a syntax tree, so all code is destroyed once it's been executed. It's a very elegant solution, but a very difficult implementation. (Especially when it comes to loops and garbage collection.)

[–] zod000@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 1 week ago

This is excellent. This reminds me of when I couldn't get any hard requirements or specs for a back end tool that I was tasked with making, so to spite everyone, and maybe myself, I wrote it in brainfuck. It was rock solid for years, and then I left due to management actively preventing me from furthering my career. I still wonder how long that process kept being used before someone had to look into the source to make changes.

[–] TheBrideWoreCrimson@sopuli.xyz 4 points 1 week ago (1 children)

So... how much fabric is in these chain-mail bikinis, exactly?
Because without any, they're basically going to be see-through, right? Not that I would complain.

[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 8 points 1 week ago (2 children)

No fabric at all, just metal rings and a bit of string. They are far from see-through though because they are pretty dense. If you’re close enough you can see a bit of… anatomy… but it’s more on the side of a coarsly knit sweater than transparent fabric.

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[–] njordomir@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

There are worse hobbies. There's also no shortage of items to try.

Ideas:

  • eyeglasses
  • braces
  • bra underwire
  • Freddy's hand
  • Edward Scissorhand's hand
  • fake flowers with a wire core
  • bread bag ties
  • beer cans
  • tire tread reinforcement
  • a knight in chainmail
  • Christmas tree tinsel
  • photoframe
  • tie clip
  • tooth fillings
  • a bicycle
  • a tricycle
  • chain link fence
  • chastity belt
  • hammer
  • aluminum wrapped baked potato
[–] 30p87@feddit.org 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Through your body with nippleclamps?

[–] dfyx@lemmy.helios42.de 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I'd need a couple more volunteers to make sure all signals have the same delay.

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[–] Rubanski@discuss.tchncs.de 8 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I once routed a SCART signal into cinch with an assortment of different paperclips. Worked perfectly fine

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[–] grue@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (5 children)

So unless you’re going for an extremely high resolution on a really cheap monitor over a long distance

Speaking of "extremely high resolution on a really cheap monitor," it took a solid decade and a half before I was able to buy a digital flat-panel monitor capable of resolution comparable to the analog CRT I was using in 2002. VGA was no joke!

(The only problem with QXGA on a 19" CRT, aside from the weight and power draw, was that in a world before decent high-DPI fractional scaling the text was too tiny to read easily. Other than that, it worked fine.)

[–] glimse@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

The last part reminded me of a night my friends and I played Dead Rising on a CRT. Couldn't read any text so we were just guessing what to do

[–] atomicbocks@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago

I have a flat panel from the early 2000s with a resolution of 1600x1200. I use it for old consoles because it also has an s-video input.

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[–] owenfromcanada@lemmy.ca 60 points 1 week ago (4 children)

As someone who works in R&D in software/electronics, I can say I do this kind of thing regularly.

[–] moonshadow@slrpnk.net 30 points 1 week ago

No matter how slick tech gets, peek behind the curtain and this is what you'll see :)

[–] einkorn@feddit.org 18 points 1 week ago

Yeah, but there is a difference between the research and development phase and consumer usage.

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[–] Tilgare@lemmy.world 32 points 1 week ago (1 children)

One time as a kid, I got myself in trouble and I got TV taken away from me - my dad came up to my room with a pair of scissors and just cut my coax cable. I stripped that bad boy and shoved the end back in to my TV, worked a treat. I also had my wifi antenna from my desktop taken from me at some point, so I took a paper clip and stuck it in there - not GREAT reception, but it was good enough!

[–] Damage@feddit.it 16 points 1 week ago

I've got to tell you, when you started with the coax cable I imagined a different era than what was revealed when you wrote about wifi

[–] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 30 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Unshielded wire in a guitar amplifier be like: "Ayo, how is everybody doing, let's go and MAKE SOME NOOOOOOISE!"

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[–] neidu3@sh.itjust.works 16 points 1 week ago

I've done some very dodgy things with VGA cables in an effort to route the cables through narrow bulkheads. For normal computer-to-monitor-lengths this is probably fine.

I haven't noticed much signal degradation below 4m-ish.

At 12m, you better solder properly and wrap some extra shielding around your splice.

Source: I've ran plenty of VGA cables between bridge computers and a deck monitor on ships.

[–] aeharding@vger.social 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Posted from my 2m aliexpress usb-c cable running at 40gbps

[–] QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works 12 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (5 children)

edit: also thanks for fixing that bug I found that one time :>

[–] NeatNit@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 week ago

It appears that we have been graced with the presence of the lead developer of Voyager himself! I wonder how many times he gets this question and if he regrets giving his user a special color :P

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[–] zod000@lemmy.dbzer0.com 11 points 1 week ago (1 children)

This image triggers me so much, but mostly because it is truer than I want to admit.

[–] rumba@lemmy.zip 6 points 1 week ago (2 children)

VGA didn't care much about interference.

Lan party, we didn't have T connectors, so we cut two coax apart and spliced them with some tinfoil. it worked until someone bumped it hard.

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[–] ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Glares at high-speed DAQ electronics and high-frequency analogue sensing circuits

PCB cries in EMI

[–] owenfromcanada@lemmy.ca 9 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Regular circuits: "What's that? You want to hack me together with a breadboard from 1963 and a hodgepodge of old telecom wire and misc parts? Sure, sounds great!"

DSP circuits: "Being more than 2mm from the IC makes me feel icky :("

[–] ThePyroPython@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago

Where's my emotional support coupling capacitor? I can't function without my emotional support coupling capacitor!

Hand drawn PCBs from the 60s: look at my beautiful curved tracks, don't they just accentuate my thick copper fills?

Any PCB since Gerber: you'll take my 45 degrees and like it!

[–] JohnSmith@feddit.uk 9 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Now lets see the same hack but for the port above.

[–] lb_o@lemmy.world 17 points 1 week ago (5 children)

Port above is COM. It experienced even more abuse than VGA.

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[–] lemonSqueezy@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago) (3 children)

This reminds me of a mod around the time of the TI-83 ish , where you had solder diodes to a cable connecting two devices.

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[–] riskable@programming.dev 6 points 1 week ago (1 children)

Big Cable is the one generating all the noise to begin with!

[–] MrScottyTay@sh.itjust.works 5 points 1 week ago

I made a composite cable for my Sega megadrive by splicing an RCA cable with two pieces of a thick paperclip. Worked great. I just had to remember which were the two holes to stick it in

[–] GreenKnight23@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

those are used syringes found in a 1980s Soviet medical facility.

[–] Drekaridill@lemmy.wtf 4 points 1 week ago

I had to do this with a stlink debugger once. It worked.

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