what? I thought Vance was hetro-sectional
this post was submitted on 18 Mar 2026
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Pretty sure he’s bi-sectional
I don't understand what the couch is trying to say.
When you change nobody or to and believes you.
Jokes aside it's referring to people who don't believe in bisexuality. Changing "Men OR women" to "men AND women"
Don’t dead open inside
Pretty sure it's saying JD Vance AND Peter Thiel fucked on that couch.
Fucked AND that couch
Everything about this image makes me feel uncomfortable.
The couch said he had an affair with the side table!
That's his side piece.
I didn't know JD Vance identifies as bi, but I still assumed they fucked at some point.
He does not identify as bi.
As with the whole couch meme, we’re just conjuring things out of nowhere by saying them online.
Denial doesn’t work here, JD.
Then how about this: speaking on behalf of bisexual men everywhere: we don’t want him, and we don’t appreciate him being made a member of our group as a joke.
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I always wondered when Thiel topped Vance, did he force JD to wear makeup?
Maybe hr said he looked so good in his eye liner and the compliment has guided his hand every morning.
Yeah, JD bottomed. No doubt.
Hey now, all genders and sexual orientations can enjoy being in drag.
Unless this is referring to something else.
he's stated that as a child he once thought he was gay, or at the very least attracted to men.
I really don't care cause him being in the closet is just another example of his weakness/dishonesty and gayness isn't wicked (while the rest of him certainly is), but... that man is still gay and his eyeshadow and the way he interacts with his wife scream it. Lavender marriages have been a thing for a while. 🤷
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He said Garden State made him feel like a woman.
Fake news Thiel ain't a couch.
Are you sure about that?
thiel perfers them YOUNGER and a model, of course and only to the point they start causing problems for him,
I get all my news from memes ✨ 💅✨
JD is fully closeted, and thiel is still down low, dont think hes truley out.
Peter Thiel is openly gay lol
He got outed by gawker and then proceeded to end their bloodline.
What???
Yeah ok, I don't know, maybe 20 years ago he wasn't openly gay. Well it appears to be the case, but kinda makes sense, Silicon Valley is still toxic, but it was probably even more toxic in 2k
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I don't get it. Who are these normies who give one single fuck about JD Vance? To be clear, MAGA are not normies.
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JD is bi? Is that why he likes to fuck couches?
These dudes will fuck anything as long as it doesn't consent.
I can't get past this guy having his sword on his left side.
That's your shield arm silly, how are you gonna grab that?
Same way he drew the axe that's floating in the air by his left hand. I assume he's telekinetic.
Lol, I think he's dropping the axe — but at the very least an axe makes sense to be on the same side as your swinging arm.
It's hard to see but I think his right shoulder/arm may be bending back with the force of the push, but his arm appears to somehow be down the length of it so the mass of the shield would cover his center and the small end would be pointed out towards the tip of his arm. Like a forearm mount. So his left and is dropping the axe, but would also grab his dagger/sword as he is left handed I assume
Yes, which makes sense except you would want to cross your left arm over your body to properly unsheathe a blade like that. The problem ends up being that you can't actually lift your arm high enough to leverage the blade out of the scabbard, at least not without using your other hand to angle it. That blade looks to be about the length of his arm, if his shield arm can be used as a reference. If it were a dagger or at the very least a little bit shorter of a shortsword, it would make much more sense.
The axe makes perfect sense sense to be hooked on the left side, as it should be relatively easy to free from any sheath or leather strap you have it hanging by.
Edit: I didn't take into consideration the leather strap the scabbard is hanging from, I'm pretty sure that would make it even harder to handle on the left side with your left hand. Idk, maybe I'm wrong and this guy just grabs it, throws it up out of the scabbard and catches it — he could be that guy.
Another peepee tape we should expect?
Yeah Conservatives aren't ‘normies’ mate.
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