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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/anim2dweeb on 2026-02-05 04:30:21+00:00.
so i went to the grocery to get lactose free cheese. but first i had to get crickets for my lizard. so i didn’t want them to get cold and die in the car. (-30, sketch part of town) they die very fast in cold so i brought them with me. i didnt get a basket for a brick of cheese obviously. well i get to the cheese and they had lactose free cheddar!!! you don’t understand how cool this is. they always only have marble. i haven’t had cheddar cheese in 5 years and marble just ain’t the same. well back to the story, i got all the cheese all 5 bricks. then as i was balancing my 5 bricks of cheese and bag of live crickets, i see the alcohol isle and remember my sister asked for coolers. well i didn’t know what kind she wanted so i called her and called and called and she wouldn’t pick up. i accidentally dropped everything so everyone looked at me cause i just dropped an unhinged amount of cheese, and feeder crickets. don’t even look old enough to be in the alcohol isle. well i get the coolers. make my way to the counter with 7 coolers, 5 blocks of cheese and a bag of live crickets looking fucked in the head. all balanced under my neck. the cashier asks me if i’m even old enough to be buying alcohol. i wanted to say that most underaged kid buys one specific drink, they do not assemble a survival kit for a lizard and a lactose free digestive system. the crickets succumbed to the cold on the way home. TL;DR turns out i needed a basket