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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/jem7118 on 2026-02-03 10:26:20+00:00.
It’s been a few days and my stomach has settled enough to share my FU. I would also like to preface this that I am in my 30’s, of good hygiene and did not think I was an idiot before this. I do now.
In 2017 When plastic straws got banned my friend and I got matching reusable metal straws with a little phrase etched on them. Our master plan was to take them out with us to pubs etc to avoid the floppy paper straws of sadness. Now as you can imagine that happened once.
However, my daughter and I love an iced coffee. We have a pretty good set up at home with an ice machine, coffee machine, syrups etc. That fateful metal straw makes an appearance alongside its new metal straw friends multiple times a day. After it’s used it’s rinsed with warm soapy water and left to dry - ready for its next iced delight. Wonderful.
About a week ago I thought my coffee tasted off. Stale. Something was not quite right. One close sniff of the straw confirmed my stomach flip - it smelled damp, musty… earthy. I ordered some straw cleaners.
Now here is where I absolutely fucked up.
A normal person would have cut their losses and tossed it. Living in my delusion that I had not been sucking on a mouldy straw would have been delightful.
Instead I used this straw cleaner which with one gentle push into the top, came out completely black. Thick chunks of black mould fell into the sink - forever tainting using straws ever again.
Every single one of these metal straws - black mould inside. And not just a little sprinkling. Think an ecosystem of Black Death. Generations of mould have gathered here at the Mecca of foosty straws.
So I share this as a warning for anyone like me who thinks rinsing a straw is enough. It absolutely isn’t.
TL;DR I used a metal straw for 9 years only rinsing it. Before getting a straw cleaner and removing 9 years of chunky black mould I had been enjoying with my daily iced coffees.