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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/usernametakenm8 on 2026-01-20 04:44:00+00:00.
I am blinking rapidly as I type this. My boys fell asleep and I was taking some me-time to browse Reddit. Then I set my phone in my lap and rubbed my eyes real quick. Good thing I had washed my hands or it would’ve been much worse. The burning is mild. (yaaaay for only mildly burning eyes…)
At least the dinner I made earlier was deliciously spicy?? So that’s kinda worth it.
Why am I so dumb??
Oh wow the Rules thing says they want *more* words? I thought Reddit preferred succinct. Guess that’s what the tldr is for. Uh… I made Broccoli Cooked Forever. It’s the only way I, a 35-year-old woman, will eat broccoli. It’s delicious and spicy and I put it on grilled chicken breasts topped with melted cheddar cheese. Oh good! The Post button lit up! I’m going to go wash my hands again!
TL;DR I minced up some habaneros for my dinner tonight and then, hours later, rubbed my eyes with my still-habanero’d hands