this post was submitted on 11 Jan 2026
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Programmer Humor

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[โ€“] termaxima@slrpnk.net 4 points 50 minutes ago (1 children)

Proud imperative stoneager here ๐Ÿฆ

[โ€“] Dhar@lemmy.ca 1 points 5 minutes ago

Cavepeople together strong!

[โ€“] Jankatarch@lemmy.world 3 points 2 hours ago

More like mix and match your path lmao.

[โ€“] craftrabbit@lemmy.zip 5 points 5 hours ago

I've been shifting around, but never to the OOP boilerplater. I despise Java.

[โ€“] goatinspace@feddit.org 14 points 11 hours ago
[โ€“] freohr@lemmy.world 11 points 11 hours ago

Uses neovim with gruvbox theme on arch

Damn, why are you calling me out personally? Though I use it to write python scripts and LaTeX, not rust...

[โ€“] palordrolap@fedia.io 20 points 13 hours ago (1 children)

history | grep -E '(sed|grep|awk|perl)' | wc -l 107

Dang. That's out of 1000. I need to up my game. Also three of those seds are part of something with a -basedir and don't count.

So yeah, about 10% of my commands are iterating shell pipe things for poops and giggles, I guess.

... and this got me going down the rabbit hole of writing a filter for my history to pull out the first command on the line. This is non-trivial because of potential preceding variable assignments. Most used commands are currently apt and man and ls. I think apt is a Spiders Georg situation because the system is fairly fresh and I keep finding things that I haven't installed yet. Also I went through a patch of trying to parse its output.

... oh, er... unga bunga.

$ history | grep -E '(sed|grep|awk|perl)' | wc -l
50
$ history | wc -l
500

Checks out perfectly.

[โ€“] ArrowMax@feddit.org 10 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Just finished an assignment for uni: Memory safety in Rust: Mechanisms and limits - a comparison to C/C++.

Fuck.

Great overview of Rust's weaknesses and strengths:

Li et al. 2024 Rust for Linux: Understanding the Security Impact of Rust in the Linux Kernel

[โ€“] passepartout@feddit.org 4 points 12 hours ago

Rust introduces some pretty awesome concepts, but I see why it might be controversial to some. I (sadly) have no use case for it though.

[โ€“] red_tomato@lemmy.world 110 points 21 hours ago (6 children)

The OOP boilerplater is the only one with a job.

[โ€“] rainwall@piefed.social 103 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 20 hours ago) (1 children)

Imperative stonager works there too. You've just never seen him because he hasen't accepted a meeting invite is 14 years.

[โ€“] pinball_wizard@lemmy.zip 32 points 20 hours ago

You've just never seen him because he hasen't accepted a meeting invite is 14 years.

And counting!

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[โ€“] Atlas_@lemmy.world 18 points 16 hours ago (1 children)
[โ€“] squaresinger@lemmy.world 5 points 14 hours ago

Found the esoteric programmer!

[โ€“] dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works 4 points 12 hours ago

Vim is life. And use good variable names.

[โ€“] PokerChips@programming.dev 34 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

I feel like the author is a MacBook user.

[โ€“] yogurtwrong@lemmy.world 4 points 5 hours ago

Imperative stoneagers getting an old MacBook from somewhere and going "huh, I guess its UNIX" is probably true though

[โ€“] someacnt@sh.itjust.works 6 points 13 hours ago

That's such a way to dismiss the theory and academia

[โ€“] itkovian@lemmy.world 20 points 18 hours ago (1 children)

I don't belong to any of the above. Am I even a programmer at this point?

[โ€“] marcos@lemmy.world 16 points 16 hours ago (1 children)

I belong to all of them. Same question.

[โ€“] sukhmel@programming.dev 9 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

You've transcended programming

[โ€“] itkovian@lemmy.world 1 points 5 hours ago

To being a coder?

[โ€“] andioop@programming.dev 17 points 19 hours ago (2 children)

OOP boilerplater except for the Windows bit; trying to slowly move off proprietary software and choose open source when I can

[โ€“] Electricd@lemmybefree.net 1 points 4 hours ago

Jetbrains though :(

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[โ€“] 6nk06@sh.itjust.works 26 points 20 hours ago (1 children)

I was triggered at every panel, it's unacceptable!

[โ€“] passepartout@feddit.org 27 points 20 hours ago

I hope no one got left unoffended

[โ€“] RustyShackleford@programming.dev 3 points 13 hours ago (1 children)
[โ€“] Electricd@lemmybefree.net 1 points 4 hours ago (1 children)

Nah. It's underlying assumptions are wrong.

[โ€“] potatoguy@lemmy.eco.br 21 points 21 hours ago (10 children)

Hear me out:

Mixing OOP and functional code to abstract the shit out of everything making 5k loc in around 500 loc in java. You can do magic using this trick.

[โ€“] termaxima@slrpnk.net 1 points 49 minutes ago

Yes, you can make money and electricity magically disappear !

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[โ€“] 9point6@lemmy.world 20 points 21 hours ago* (last edited 21 hours ago) (2 children)

Oh, I guess I'm a stoneager with a penchant for functional elitism then.

Though I will admit OOP is valid for involved data modelling, everything else should be functional though.

I've also trained myself out of most short variable names for maintainability reasons

[โ€“] Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com 4 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Yeah, it's wild people "don't like OOP" 100%, it's like most good things, don't put it where it shouldn't be.

[โ€“] ozymandias117@lemmy.world 2 points 12 hours ago

If you're really going down that route, you need to also remember that even the C programmed Linux Kernel is highly OOP

[โ€“] masterspace@lemmy.ca 18 points 20 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago) (11 children)

Outside of the for loop counters i and j, short variable names are awful. Coming back to old code written with abr var nams is like talking to someone in the military who just constantly throws out jargon and acronyms that they know you don't know.

But so are Java style ObserverFactoryManagerTemplateMachinistTemplater names.

There's a sweet middle ground of short, but actually descriptive name. Sometimes it's not possible but that's usually a code organization / language / framework smell.

Too short variable names is usually a sign that you need to use a proper ide, with auto complete, or that you need to use a proper build process that will minify your code after the fact.

Too long names are usually a sign that your module of code (function, class, namespace, etc) is too large, or that your language/framework naming conventions are too strict, or the language doesn't encapsulate scope properly.

[โ€“] marcos@lemmy.world 6 points 16 hours ago

The length of variable and function names should be proportional to the size of the code that can potentially call them. And preferably segmented in namespaces, explicit modules, or something like that.

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