this post was submitted on 10 Jan 2026
894 points (98.6% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

36589 readers
3887 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 6 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

How do I get a GF on the Fediverse?

[–] Bgugi@lemmy.world 9 points 7 hours ago (1 children)

Download Linux, wait for programmer socks, become girlfriend.

[–] Osan@lemmy.world 4 points 3 hours ago

Did that and all I'm getting is kernel panic.

L E G U M E S!

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 28 points 15 hours ago (1 children)

Lemmy: I have between 0 and 4 boyfriends on any given day, depending on their gender identity and whether you consider a ThinkPad running Arch a "boy"

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@piefed.world 10 points 14 hours ago (1 children)

Average Lemmy boy: I may or may not be a boy today

[–] QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works 7 points 8 hours ago (1 children)
[–] spacesatan@leminal.space 6 points 7 hours ago* (last edited 7 hours ago)

I'm sure a polycule has both tried this and had to stop because it was causing too much anxiety/drama.

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 22 points 14 hours ago* (last edited 13 hours ago) (1 children)

Aside, but I hate that people say "my (F 21) boyfriend (M 53) prevents me" instead of "my boyfriend (M 53) prevents me (F 21)"

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 1 points 14 hours ago (2 children)

I don't understand. "Prevents" is correct. But she said "forbids."

[–] JackbyDev@programming.dev 7 points 13 hours ago

I had a typo. Reread it. It's the "my (gender age)" part that annoys me. "My boyfriend" is a person, "me" is a person, but "my" is not a person.

[–] kadotux@sopuli.xyz 5 points 14 hours ago

I think the order of words was the point here.

[–] skisnow@lemmy.ca 31 points 18 hours ago (3 children)

Surely if it's full of missing women's driving licenses it's not a sock drawer, it's a missing women's driving licenses drawer. Is the sort of reply I'd post if it were reddit.

[–] JcbAzPx@lemmy.world 1 points 3 hours ago

You can fit both the socks and the missing women's drivers' licenses. Unless you're really into collecting socks.

[–] BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today 5 points 14 hours ago

The other day, someone posted "I have 3 cats that roam my garden for food and cuddles. I don't have a cat."

And I posted "Yes you do, you have 3 cats, that's how cat ownership works."

Some people can't see what's directly in front of their faces.

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@piefed.world 11 points 18 hours ago

"Surely they're not missing, you've found them".

[–] Pudutr0n@lemmy.world 28 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Youtube: The REAL reason I have a boyfriend and YOU DON'T (MUST WATCH)

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@piefed.world 10 points 19 hours ago (1 children)

Wikipedia: A boyfriend is a man who is a friend or acquaintance to the speaker, often specifying a regular male companion with whom a person is platonically, romantically or sexually involved.

[–] Pudutr0n@lemmy.world 12 points 19 hours ago

[Citation needed]

[–] ivanafterall@lemmy.world 17 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 18 hours ago)

Geocities/MySpace:

[–] UnrepententProcrastinator@lemmy.ca 7 points 18 hours ago* (last edited 14 hours ago)

YTA for revealing his cross dressing spy identity!

[–] Rooty@lemmy.world 9 points 19 hours ago

4chan copypastas have more credibility than the average AITA post.

[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 48 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago) (2 children)

Mastodon: My boyfriend is on his period, and needs distracting, anyone know a good show i can put on my Jellyfin media server?

BlueSky: I did once have a girlfriend, but we seperated amicably.

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 9 points 15 hours ago

LinkedIn: I don't have "boyfriends", I have unpaid live-in interns

[–] AethiopeRoot@lemmy.zip 1 points 19 hours ago

Accurate LOL

[–] mrgoosmoos@lemmy.ca 30 points 1 day ago (1 children)

fake. this implies that the poster took the time to figure out that the licenses belonged to missing women. everybody knows that AITA posters can't do an ounce of work by themselves

[–] Pudutr0n@lemmy.world 6 points 19 hours ago

Hey reddit AITA for coming you with serious relationship concerns instead of using my brain for 30 seconds?

[–] froh42@lemmy.world 69 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Also reddit:

My gf didn't close the tooth paste in the bathroom.

Reddit: Red flag, LEAVE HER

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 3 points 15 hours ago

Today it's the toothpaste, tomorrow it's your neighbours penis

[–] Nioxic@lemmy.dbzer0.com 1 points 20 hours ago

Could be worse... Could be wafflestomping

[–] slothrop@lemmy.ca 99 points 1 day ago (1 children)

lemmy: "pointlessy gendered. btw, I use arch."

[–] ObviouslyNotBanana@piefed.world 66 points 1 day ago (2 children)

Lemmy: STOP POSTING CENSORED SHIT

[–] otacon239@lemmy.world 46 points 1 day ago (3 children)
[–] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 5 points 23 hours ago

No I can't. I don't have a working mic.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] slothrop@lemmy.ca 25 points 1 day ago (12 children)

...and the commenter has 0 posts, 3,422 comments....

[–] user224@lemmy.sdf.org 32 points 1 day ago

Or...

37 posts
326 comments
Banned from 23 communities
Joined 2 hours ago

load more comments (10 replies)
[–] cupcakezealot@piefed.blahaj.zone 30 points 1 day ago (1 children)

tumblr: my boyfriends are misha and jensen

its me i'm tumblr

[–] bitjunkie@lemmy.world 7 points 1 day ago

Even when joking about the phenomenon, Jared gets no love

[–] Mac@mander.xyz 17 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Pixelfed: [Photograph of tree-covered rolling hills under the afternoon sun with few, wispy clouds in the sky.]

[–] Karjalan@lemmy.world 1 points 19 hours ago* (last edited 19 hours ago)

It's that... Is that the windows xp background?

Edit - my bad, it's been a minute, forgot it didn't have trees

YTA: Can't a man have a hobby collecting things these days?

[–] jaybone@lemmy.zip 14 points 1 day ago (3 children)

ml: my boyfriend doesn’t respect the benevolent CCP, is this a red flag?

[–] Agent641@lemmy.world 2 points 15 hours ago

ml loves red flags

[–] peopleproblems@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago

hexbear: my boyfriend is anti-authoritarian, how racist against the Chinese is he?

[–] Aqarius@lemmy.world 5 points 1 day ago

Surely that's the opposite of a red flag

[–] Cruxifux@feddit.nl 14 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Boyfriends are a liberal lie

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments
view more: next ›