this post was submitted on 09 Jan 2026
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


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all 45 comments
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[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 9 points 1 day ago (2 children)

STOP FUCKING POSTING CENSORED SHIT

[–] Dasus@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Oh damn I didn't even notice I thought my phone had some dust or thrash on it but yeah theyve censored the i in "died"

[–] Starski@lemmy.zip -2 points 1 day ago (1 children)

Unfortunately you're feeding into it by reacting this way.

[–] ThatWeirdGuy1001@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Commenting doesn't bump the post up the feed. Only upvoting does.

[–] obinice@lemmy.world 128 points 3 days ago (5 children)

Thank you for (poorly?) censoring the word "died", I was scared that I might see a reference to mortality online today. Phew, dodged a bullet! Aah!

[–] LouNeko@lemmy.world 30 points 3 days ago (2 children)

If you say "No I don't want that.", legally speaking, Death can't get you anymore.

[–] KoboldCoterie@pawb.social 8 points 3 days ago (1 children)

This one weird trick Death doesn't want you to know about!

[–] stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This new immortality trick helps you avoid Death, and Deaths all over the world hate it!

Whenever I see one of these but a dental trick, the title is always like "this new trick to help you remove your surgically implanted gums really works, and dentists hate it!" And I'm like "well I'm not gonna try it. Dentists probably hate this cause they be fixin everybody's gums now cause of this." And the article never tells you why dentists hate it

[–] NannerBanner@literature.cafe 1 points 1 day ago

If I remember correctly, someone once went down the rabbit hole of clicking on one of those links and documented the experience, and it was a maze of link after link that would make those AI bot trapping programs proud. If you actually got to an article, I'm blown away.

[–] Arrkk@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago (1 children)

"Swiper no swiping! Swiper no swiping! Swiper no swiping!"

[–] humorlessrepost@lemmy.world 2 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Until eventually, after days of snorting caffeine pills and dancing like Jessie Spano, you manage to mumble “I’m so scared” before falling asleep involuntarily… and swiper finally swipes.

[–] ragebutt@lemmy.dbzer0.com 15 points 3 days ago

I straight up thought there was some shit on my phone screen

[–] sigh@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago

Other apps and sites will straight up not publish your post if it contains certain words.

Gotta protect that advertising revenue.

[–] NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone 3 points 2 days ago

Mine cousin doth part the veil mortal.

I love when people do that. Think about the childrens!

[–] Dorkyd68@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago (1 children)

I loved hp. Until I discovered adult hp Fandom and then I couldn't distance myself from it quicker

Honestly I think HP is very good. It's a shame that the author is a huge asshole.

[–] pimento64@sopuli.xyz 82 points 3 days ago (1 children)

It really fucked me up when Dumbledore announced that house Slytherin would get one point for "every Irish papist who did not deserve to be killed by British muggle soldiers", and continued "naturally, the score has not changed". No idea how J.K. got away with that one.

[–] unemployedclaquer@sopuli.xyz 17 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Not so fluent in the lore or how to search it. Where from or which book?

[–] TheBat@lemmy.world 95 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Harry Potter and the Troubles of Ireland

[–] Not_Dav3@lemmy.world 20 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I always get that one mixed up with "Harry Potter and the Irish Republican Army".

[–] Dozzi92@lemmy.world 11 points 2 days ago (1 children)

That was the Seamus Finnegan spinoff series I think.

[–] Stamau123@lemmy.world 15 points 3 days ago (2 children)

From Harry Potter and The Fucking Wizard

[–] 0ops@piefed.zip 12 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Plot twist/spoiler: turns out Harry was The Fucking Wizard

[–] ebolapie@lemmy.world 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

What? But he was just Harry.

[–] guy@piefed.social 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Until Hagrid burst down the door and calmly proclaimed Harry to be, at least, a wizard

[–] ebolapie@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] guy@piefed.social 2 points 2 days ago

Wait was it lizard?

[–] the_grass_trainer@lemmy.world 14 points 2 days ago

I knew someone like this except he would regurgitate stupid quotes from anime. It got so bad that after he would finish I'd just start asking "what anime is that from?" And a few times he actually named them. 😒😮‍💨

[–] sparkles@piefed.zip 32 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Gotta be a lot like dating a Disney obsessed person.

[–] VitoRobles@lemmy.today 6 points 2 days ago

Same energy.

[–] ZILtoid1991@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Sometimes I wonder if I was too out of touch when I couldn't quote movies and pop media, then I remember shit like this...

[–] LemmyKnowsBest@lemmy.world 8 points 2 days ago

My ex husband couldn't hold conversations. He could only quote fragments of lines from movies & Simpsons & Futurama.

[–] SwingingTheLamp@piefed.zip 22 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Hey, is this the 500/10 guy?

[–] AllNewTypeFace@leminal.space 4 points 2 days ago

also, somebody who is au fait with transphobia

[–] stiffyGlitch@lemmy.world 5 points 2 days ago

This is really funny and I approve

[–] Proprietary_Blend@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago) (1 children)

Yeah but what about Epstein?

[–] BanMe@lemmy.world 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

He didn't quote Dumbledore much that I know of

Is that the hat thing?

[–] Embargo@lemmy.zip 2 points 3 days ago

!spoiler So did Dumbledore