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Ask Lemmy
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Holy shit that hits hard
would you drink Bailey's from a shoe?
All your freinds start dropping dead like flies.
While I haven’t yet had that happen, they’re all talking about retiring soon, they all have hearing issues, and none of us have energy to have fun anymore
I am 68 so it’s prime time for boomer friend pop offs right now. I was 100% healthy until 59 and then I got a pinched nerve in my back, sciatica and neuropathy all within 6 months. Now I can only walk 10 paces and I have to sit. I don’t have a fair assessment of aging cuz that shit stepped in but if I did not have all that crap I would just say arthritis bugs me.
Doors close and options narrow. The way you think about the future fundamentally changes.
You have to remember not to project your decline onto culture, society, and the world. You have to remember that many, many things are better now than when you were young.
Having to go to old people parties.
It's rather go to diy underground shows, but I'm dad aged now.
I rust wasn't too rave and dance, but I feel like most of the kids would be creeped out.
It goes through a weirdness peak between 30 and 50. Once you get to a certain age and stop giving "hello fellow kids" vibes nobody cares.
I rust wasn’t too rave and dance
?
*I just wanted to rave and dance-
ty!
The lack of energy and the rise of depression.
You stop making new friends, and the friends you've had move away, don't have time anymore due to family and job, and eventually start dying off.
If you don't make a conscious effort and invest time into creating new friendships (with considerable difficulty since you yourself are tied to "adult" obligations), you can end up alone with withered social skills before you realize it.
There's also the danger of collecting bad memories or feelings of regret tied to certain activities, like "I should start playing the guitar again...but I already tried to get back into it multiple times, so why bother?"
If you aren't careful that will lead to stopping doing the things you once enjoyed, with no new hobbies to take their place.
The friends I used to have not only moved away, but moved away to Florida
If you don't make a conscious effort and invest time into creating new friendships (with considerable difficulty since you yourself are tied to "adult" obligations), you can end up alone with withered social skills before you realize it.
One of the things I did when I was in my 20's and 30's that I'm really glad I did, was to always be willing to relocate. I did it about 5 times for new jobs, once for a new school, and twice for a romantic relationship (including with the woman I ended up marrying). I made new friends in each city, and kept those "new friendship" social skills over time. Now I've settled into a specific place with my family, but I have friends all over the U.S., know a little bit about a lot of cities and their neighborhoods and the local culture, and perhaps most importantly, know what I'm looking for in friendships and relationships.
I made new friends in my 30's because I absolutely had to, living in a city where I only knew one other person. And now I'm still making new friends occasionally in my 40's because I like to: colleagues and neighbors and fellow parents from my kids' schools, etc.
all the upvotes.
bad feelings have poisoned the majority of my past memories and relationships and hobbies. as a result, i have had to abandon so so many of them that it hurts. and it is very difficult to figure out what comes next for me.
I’m me of the fundamental changes for me was …..
FROM: oh good a new project to learn, a new tool to buy
TO: I don’t want to deal with fixing that again or having to buy yet another tool. How expensive can it be to just pay someone and have it done?
When you're peeing and you finish peeing, so you put it away and then you pee a little more in your pants
Female here, but iirc that last little bit came down fresh from your kidneys into your bladder as soon as the bladder empties. I just wait like a minute til that extra comes out before I finish up if I'm not wearing a liner and it works. Idk if it would work for men tho? Hopefully? 😂
Having to wait a few seconds after peeing to make sure that you're really done peeing becaue sometimes there's that little surprise burp at the end that if you put your dick away too soon will be a spot on your underwear. Not a big one, mind you; you're not peeing yourself. Just that last little straggler running to catch up.
That's why I'm one of the few guys that actually wipes down after pissing because I don't want that. It's uncomfortable as well as embarrassing to deal with.
Too many times I've witnessed other guys who'd be done with their business and zip up without a care. Their crotches have to be smelling like piss and that's just gross.
Getting old is a sniper's alley. You're running through, and all around you people are getting picked off, dropping to the ground. Cancer, stroke, dementia, falling down the stairs. Somehow you're still going, brilliant! But then you find a lump, or get chest pains...
So far I'm one of the lucky ones, still dodging the bullets but hoping for a good clean end when it's my turn.
I'm hit! Woman down! Slipped on the ice and am now in hospital with a fucked-up knee. Waiting for an MRI scan, spending the night here. Codeine isn't helping, hoping for some hillbilly heroin.
On the bright side I have excellent friends and neighbours. I feel loved.
I don't know if there's anything unique about aging. The shittiest part of aging IMO is the random life-changing medical events you cannot foresee or prevent. It could be as simple as stumbling on uneven ground and tearing your ACL, or as extreme as being diagnosed with some unusual cancer.
Have you guys noticed the size of basically all text has gotten smaller and harder to read? It has made a lot of posts I encounter online just absolutely none of my business.
Oh also my back hasn’t not hurt like hell for like 8 years.
As a very tall dude, back pain.
I deal with early onset arthritis pain occasionally, but back pain legit sucks way more!
the thing you realize as you get older is that the spine is holding the whole shitshow together, and you rely on it constantly. so when it's fucked, everything is fucked.
I was told once many years ago by a retired (kinda) member of a major biker gang the following:
"Getting old ain't for pussies."
I was around twelve, he wasn't lying, I'm forty-six now. All the stupid crap you have done early on in your life will come back around and cause aches and pains. You have to force yourself to keep moving through the pain or you will end up doing next to nothing every chance you get.
My mind has always kept me at home so I can't say much there, I've never been to a club and rarely go to bars. I'm just not a social person.
With a lot of experiences, many things feel repetitive and uninteresting. Making sure not to bring that energy everywhere takes a bit of practice. Health worries of course. People you know also getting old or disappearing. Losing parents if you haven’t already. Being expected to just get up and adult your way through it, somehow. And you do.
Making sure not to bring that energy everywhere takes a bit of practice.
I remember an interview of Quincy Jones where he was just shit talking popular music of that time (maybe early 2010s), and ran through a bunch of examples, basically explaining where every musical element (particular chord progressions, instrumental combinations, beats/rhythms, etc.) that made it into whatever current popular song, was first pioneered by some recording artist he had worked with in some earlier decade.
He obviously knew a ton about music, from classical to jazz to pop to hip hop to country, but it was an interesting glimpse into the mind of a person who was basically saying "I've realized there's nothing new to me anymore."
Most contemporary music sounds like shit. I try to stay current to at least within the last 3 years, but the older I get, the more it just sounds like shit.
South Park did an episode about it, and they were spot on.
If you're into rock, check out The Warning. Three young sisters from Mexico who make very solid rock and are brilliant live!
Pulling a muscle because I sneezed too hard.
Worrying about if I'll have enough to retire on, if I can retire at all. Worrying about health, the drop in spice tolerance, waking up stiff. Eyesight starting to deteriorate. Wanting to be more social, but would often rather just stay home. Maybe not so unique, but worth a mention.
55m here.
Half the energy, but still all the work plus some to do.
I'm not particularly old by any reasonable standard, but the biggest shock to me upon entering adulthood was how there's always some fucking thing that needs doing. Doesn't matter if it's chores, bills, or other shit, there's always something.
Yea this is something I'm dealing with as a self employed young adult now. Its genuinely getting on my nerves when friends in college or younger complaining about being super bored and saying "there's nothing to do!!".
There are certainly times I don't want to do anything but I never have the opportunity of being "bored"
I’m sure it’s not unique to getting old as there could be other causes, but for me it’s been that my grip strength wanes and I drop things pretty regularly now. I used to fence and sword spar and I had gotten used to barely holding things so I wouldn’t break them. Now if I’m not thinking about it, things just kind of fall out of my hands. Very weird thing to realize.
Losing the physical abilities that you've relied on your whole life. Had back surgery 3 years ago. I can barely walk now because of pain in my hips. My strength is gone. It's a fucking kick in the dick.
The things I dislike the most about getting old is 1) all the obligations and lack of free time. Partly my fault, I love being a dad, but I could use a break. 2) recovery isn't as fast as it used to be. What used to be hours is now a day. What used to be a day is now days. Etc etc
Need a longer runway.
The warmup takes ages, no matter what I'm doing.