Why do Americans give Santa cookies and milk? He's not 5 years old. Leave him a glass of water, and a couple of ibuprofen. He's not feeling great after every child in Britain left him a mince pie and an alcoholic beverage.
this post was submitted on 26 Dec 2025
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....because a 5 year old leaving cognac and a biscotti might be a bit inappropriate ?
I always left him a glass of sherry and all the other kids I knew left either sherry or whiskey. It's tradition damn it!
Ibuprofen and alcohol do not mix well. Well except you want totally get hammered
What? Drinking while taking ibuprofen just increases the risk of stomach bleeding and ulcers, it doesn't get you hammered.
The list of vegan crimes keeps mounting:
- This poster is one of the worst things I've ever seen.
- Vegans will lie to your face about how good oat milk is. (You made my coffee taste like porridge, you bastards!)
(/hj)
Vegans are annoying but oat milk is delicious you simple carrot stick. Like many ingredients they are not completely interchangeable.
Poster is awful though
I don't hear anything from vegans, but I always hear people complaining about them and it's annoying af.
I like oatmilk for cereal, protein shakes, and sometimes breadmaking, but idk about coffee.
Yeah I like non dairy milks, especially soy and nutmilks, but oat milk is just watery oatmeal...
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Are we all ignoring Mrs. I Love Fiber???
I eat dairy still but oat milk is tasty af tbh
Best latte milk
No. Macadamia butt milk is superior.
Ooooh (except for the butt part, what)
I love me some macadamia nuts
I tried to type nut, but my keyboard autocorrect kept changing it to but, so I decided to roll withit lol
I have a butt, Greg. Can you milk me??
That does make sense, and I should have been able to guess that by context, but it is much funnier this way
Legit. Gotta be fresh, homemade stuff can be slimy. But oat milk is dank.
How do you find the oat nipples, let alone grasp them?
Oats are actually the nipples of a tiny cow.
this has gotta be AI generated right? they really have no sense of shame at all
Nope, I saw plenty of bad art before AI became a thing and this is 100% handmade. Not 100% original though, as the lines were clearly traced. You can actually tell the person who made it is fairly inexperienced in art because they used the airbrush for every single shadow and highlight, so being this anatomically correct on the lines would not be consistent if they weren't tracing.
Nobody has any frame of reference for AI, they don’t even know what old school digital art looked like apparently. It’s just anything that isn’t perfect or intentionally ugly must be AI.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen an AI pillow shade.
Doesn't look like ai so maybe they paid an artist
Something about it does seem a little off, like they missed a line when they traced the hand so it looks like his finger is broken, but I don't think it was AI...?
It looks like a composite. Like they did the main image with AI then touched up some areas or something. It really gives off the slop vibe but not fully.
He quite famously doesn't like a little naughty
This is like those Onion comics. Like literally, this could be an Onion comic.
Of all the vegans I have ever met, none of them have had that much muscle definition. Santa's on roids yall
We stan a vegan king!
This sentence is the origin story of the Arxur in Nature Of Predators
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