this post was submitted on 25 Dec 2025
695 points (98.2% liked)

Not The Onion

21122 readers
785 users here now

Welcome

We're not The Onion! Not affiliated with them in any way! Not operated by them in any way! All the news here is real!

The Rules

Posts must be:

  1. Links to news stories from...
  2. ...credible sources, with...
  3. ...their original headlines, that...
  4. ...would make people who see the headline think, “That has got to be a story from The Onion, America’s Finest News Source.”

Please also avoid duplicates.

Comments and post content must abide by the server rules for Lemmy.world and generally abstain from trollish, bigoted, ableist, or otherwise disruptive behavior that makes this community less fun for everyone.

And that’s basically it!

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
(page 2) 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] Gammelfisch@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago

Breaking zoning codes to build bunkers? WTF. Are the Russian Oligarchs, Chinese CCP and PLA involved in his business activities?

[–] YaksDC@sh.itjust.works 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Is he the new Sarah Winchester?

[–] Glifted@lemmy.world 8 points 3 months ago

She was more sane than he is

[–] TheEighthDoctor@lemmy.zip 6 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Well my neighbors do construction since fucking 8 in the morning and don't buy me anything so at least it's something

[–] MangoCats@feddit.it 5 points 3 months ago

I rented a house with some friends while at University... come to find out, the reason the owner rented it to us was because the neighbor was doing extensive renovations for 16 months... at 12 months the landlord "let us" switch to a month to month lease, then when the renovations completed she served us notice to vacate within 3 weeks.

[–] mavu@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 3 months ago

And they say empathy was dead.

[–] MystikIncarnate@lemmy.ca 3 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Why all the construction? Is he building 11 ballrooms?

[–] ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online 7 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Here is the thing. Mark Zuckerberg wants to know what everyone thinks and how they think and every detail about our lives no matter how small.

On the other hand, he is ultra paranoid about his own privacy. His compound where he lives is difficult to see on satellite and many of the buildings around him are dummies so people can't see by any means His actual home or what he does there. He probably has a fully offline/air gapped computer system for his own use that has never been connected to the internet.

[–] ScoffingLizard@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I bet he's a big pedo. Maybe a guy torturing immigrants. The ones who disappeared from ICE facilities are probably in his "fake" buildings and in chains with bull heads on.

[–] ArmchairAce1944@discuss.online 3 points 3 months ago (2 children)

At this point in time I am willing to believe that even if Zuckerberg has zero interest in children, these billionaires all probably have orgies where they fuck children as a bonding exercise and to 'seal' themselves in the deal.

Kinda like how in the Mafia you had to murder someone to 'make your bones' and be a made man or someone important in the gang. It's one of those things you can't walk back from.

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] ShaggySnacks@lemmy.myserv.one 3 points 3 months ago

All the billionaires want their own private Epstein Ballroom.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Sam_Bass@lemmy.world 3 points 3 months ago

I've had nch for a couple years now and while they do dim it a bit they increase the tinny sound of my music

load more comments
view more: ‹ prev next ›