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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/djmedina on 2025-12-19 23:45:14+00:00.
I’m visiting China this month for work, and also sightseeing. And last week I was in Shanghai for a few days. After I arrived and checked into my hotel, I walked nearby along Nanjing Road East, a popular tourist shopping street.
After I had some dinner in that area, I was approached at a crosswalk by two (about age 25-35) Chinese women who tried speaking some English with me (my native language). They were pretty friendly and said they were tourists from the city of Qingdao. As an American, they were curious about me and what I was doing in China, etc. After we talked for a few minutes they suggested we go somewhere and chat some more - to a restaurant. It seemed like really natural conversation and seemed normal to hang out and chat more. But being jet lagged, I wasn’t really thinking clearly. I should have known better.
I had just eaten dinner, but I told them that we can go chat while they eat. We walked for about 5 minutes, and then saw a Japanese restaurant and they suggested we go inside. It was a nice looking place but not extravagant at all. This should have been a red flag because looking back, it didn’t seem like they randomly found this place by wandering around; it seemed like they knew exactly where they were going (more on that below).
We sat in a semi-private room on the second floor. And the younger woman suggested I sit further inside the booth, further from the room’s entrance. Looking back, I think she wanted to trap me inside the small room, blocked by her, so it would be tough for me to run out of there.
They ordered seafood and something like hot pot. They also ordered sake to drink. I had already told them that I had eaten, so even though they made multiple attempts to convince me to eat, I didn’t eat anything. Also because I was jet lagged, I didn’t really want to drink alcohol, but they were really encouraging or insisting that I drink, so I did drink a little (I do happen to really like sake). Also this too should have been a red flag.
It was a fun hour or so of chatting. But in the end, the waiter came with the bill and it was about 3,000 RMB (about $430 USD). That price just was outrageous for a party of three people. The younger woman said in China it’s common for the older male to pay the bill. That may be true, but also I’m a foreign visitor who is often treated with hospitality in China. Besides, I never agreed to that, and it was extremely presumptuous of her that I would pay. I told her I wasn’t willing to pay the whole bill, as the bill was crazy expensive and I didn’t eat, and only had a little to drink.
The pressure really increased, and the mood changed quickly. And the waiter was standing there waiting for me to pay. This all felt familiar because I remembered seeing some YouTube videos of this sort of scam in China in the past. I knew that if I didn’t pay (from my recollection of these videos), the waiter would likely call the police, or follow me to my hotel, or even rough me up. I definitely don’t want to get into trouble in a foreign country, especially one like China that isn’t exactly known for emphasizing human rights. I still said I wasn’t willing to pay the whole bill but would split it in half. The women agreed. The older woman said she would pay half the bill.
In actuality, this was a scam. The women probably were not tourists, but likely live in Shanghai. They probably are friends with the restaurant owner and this was a setup. The older woman probably didn’t even pay half, but probably just didn’t pay anything.
After, we all left the restaurant at the same time and went outside. I felt ashamed that I fell for this scam. And I just wanted to get out of there and return to my hotel. Outside the restaurant, they said there was a liquor and cigarette store next door. They said we should drink more and I could buy them alcohol and cigarettes. I declined and started walking away, saying I was tired from travel and needed sleep. The younger woman said she wanted to see my hotel and even wanted to see my room. She even made some sexual talk like she wanted to see an American’s private parts. There was no way I was letting these scam artists in my room, and I didn’t even want them to know which hotel I was staying at. I quickly walked away and got the hell out of there. I walked pretty fast and didn’t look back. I don’t think they followed me, or at least not for long.
I felt ashamed that night and the next day. I visited a different city in China the next day for work and met up with a couple local Chinese friends there through my work. I decided to confide in them, and I told them the story. They were super reassuring and sympathized with me. Telling them about the experience made me feel a lot better.
Don’t let this happen to you in Asia. It’s a common scam. If any stranger asks you to go inside with them somewhere, just say no. Talk and engage with locals you don’t know because it can be fun and interesting, but don’t go anywhere with them. Use any excuse you like - that you have other plans, or you don’t hang out with strangers, or whatever. And don’t tell any strangers which hotel you’re staying at - you don’t want them to follow you there.
TLDR: I got scammed out of $210 in Shanghai by a couple woman who said they wanted to chat with me but really wanted me to pay for their expensive dinner and get my money.