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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/MycologistAwkward777 on 2025-12-17 18:43:53+00:00.
I was waiting for the bus when I saw a woman sitting on the bench quietly crying. Normally I mind my business, but she looked really sad, so I sat next to her and gently said, “Are you okay? Do you need anything?”
She sniffed, shook her head, and said, “It’s just been a hard week.”
I nodded sympathetically, trying to give supportive energy.
Unfortunately, during this emotional moment, my nose betrayed me.
I have been dealing with allergies and did not realize a sneeze was loading, the kind of sneeze that bypasses every warning and shoots out of your soul.
I sneezed directly onto her shoulder.
Not a cute sneeze. A full, wet, violent, anime-level explosion. Her shoulder glistened. I wanted to ascend to the afterlife right then.
I immediately said “OH MY GOD” and reached for tissues, but she recoiled in horror, stood up, and said, “ARE YOU SERIOUS?” Her voice cracked, which made everything worse.
I tried apologizing but the bus arrived and she basically sprinted onto it. I hesitated to follow because I didn’t want her thinking I was trying to sit near her again like some diseased menace.
So I waited for the next bus.
Forty minutes later.
She probably thinks I intentionally sneezed on her, like some unhinged sympathy sniper.
TL;DR: Tried to comfort a crying woman at a bus stop, instead fired a weaponized sneeze onto her shoulder and emotionally damaged both of us.