Ask Lemmy

You guys have never experienced JOHN RINGO.

The first book opens with Osama Bin Laden and the leader of Iran hatching a plot to kidnap sexy American coeds to rape and torture.

It then switches to the POV of our hero, a former SEAL who left the army due to his arthritis and has now enrolled in college. He is stalking a female student from his class whom he is thinking about raping, he lets the readers know that he is 100% a rapist and also that all these left-wing female students secretly desire to be raped by a strong conservative man.

But unfortunately for our hero, a white van pulls up and kidnaps the girl he was stalking right in front of him. Thinking quickly he follows the van and then ends up stowing away in the wheel well on an airplane that's on it's eay to Iran.

Long story short, he single-handedly rescues dozens of sexy coeds from the combined forces of al-queda and iran - killing Osama Bin Laden himself.

In the sequels, for which there are many, he travels to Georgia (the country not the state) and finds an isolated community descended from the Varangian Guard. These people recognize him as an alpha male and make him their leader The Kildar whoms job it is to lead them into battle and impregnate their daughters, most of whom are 14-18 year olds.

Ready Player One.

I laughed my ass off starting on like page five. It was such a hate read, total hail corporate nostalgia bait slop. Never took the coworker who recommended it serious again.

I was in a horrible spot mourning for a close relative who had just hanged himself. I made the mistake of posting on Facebook and a friend from high school recommended "12 Rules for Life, an antidote to chaos".

I was not in a good space and didn't even look at the author before ordering it. When it arrived a few days later I only had to read the first page before realizing I'd been had. Jordan fucking Peterson. What a pile of shit that guy is.

The wheel Of time series. I got through the first 2 books before realising that I disliked every character. Also every female character was written so poorly it made me want to "Tug on my braid and stamp my foot"

Anything and everything written by Ayn Rand.

The 3 Body Problem. It's trash and I'll die on that hill.

The Qur'an. It seems to assume the Bible is true and a real revelation and that it is a biblical commentary, despite clearly contradicting it in numerous places. It makes sense in the context that it came from an illiterate Bedouin paedophile from the 600s

Easily The Fountainhead.

There's a reason that

Twelve publishers rejected the manuscript before an editor at the Bobbs-Merrill Company risked his job to get it published.

My great great aunt made me read the Bible so I'd be a good little Christian. Read it got the privileges for it, sucked right ass. My only conclusion is that I liked Samson and that most Christians are hypocritical asshats. But what was I expecting my great great aunt thought Lord of the Rings and Chronicles of Narnia were evil because they had magic.

Also if anyone is curious how well the good Christian aspect faired now that I'm 26 and not 8. Well hark to the ancestors, the spirits, and the gods, I'll burn every last mega church to the ground and send them to their god to face a second judgement not my own.

The Da Vinci Code. It was laughably awful. This includes the premise as well as the writing. Dan Brown is probably sleeping on top of a pile of money with many beautiful ladies, though.

50 shades of grey. The writing was so cringe that I just couldn't get further than one chapter or so. And I've read some bad writing on AO3 before, so it's not like I'm especially sensitive.

I worked at a book store back a while now so people would ask and recommend books

The Secret was big at the time The Secret sucks ass I disliked any customer that recommended it to me after that I wouldn't say that though, I'd thank them politely.

I usually recommended Neuromancer, but it depended on topic.

Rich Dad, Poor Dad. The author is over a billion in debt. Just constantly leveraging assets in a never-ending chain of debt.

Any self improvement or "gain x skill" book

The Art of the Deal, by some Putz. I don't know whatever happened to him.

Reading Dune books ATM and the original is one of my all-time favorites. But fuck me, Dune Messiah is incomprehensible. It's 80% about Paul navel gazing. I'd read a paragraph and think, "I have no idea what that is supposed to mean." 80% of the words in the book hit me like that.