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The original was posted on /r/tifu by /u/Subject_Parfait_7496 on 2025-11-24 11:24:47+00:00.
So this happened earlier today, and I'm still dying of embarrassment every time I think about it. I decided to ride my bike to the local park since it was such a beautiful day. The park was pretty crowded with people enjoying the sunshine - families, joggers, dog walkers, you know the scene.
When I arrived, I went to park my bike at the rack near the entrance. I'm not exactly what you'd call an expert cyclist, and I misjudged my braking distance. As I approached the rack, I realized I was coming in too fast but couldn't stop in time.
There was this guy standing near the bike rack, minding his own business, looking at his phone. And yes, you guessed it - I crashed right into him. Not hard enough to knock him over, thank goodness, but definitely enough to make him stumble and drop his phone.
My brain immediately went into apology mode. In my head, I was forming a perfectly reasonable "I'm so sorry!" But what actually came out of my mouth? "SO EASY!" Said with a weird smile on my face too! ๐
The guy looked at me with complete confusion - like, did this person just crash into me and then BRAG about it? For a solid three seconds, we just stared at each other while my brain desperately tried to reboot and fix the situation.
I finally managed to stammer out an actual apology and explain that I meant to say sorry but had a complete brain-to-mouth malfunction. Thank god he had a good sense of humor. After looking at what must have been my absolutely mortified face, he just laughed and said, "Well, at least you're honest about how easy it is to crash into innocent bystanders."
We both checked that his phone was okay (it was), but I spent the rest of my time at the park avoiding that entire section just to be safe. Every time I think about it, I want to crawl into a hole and disappear.
TL;DR: Crashed my bike into a stranger, and instead of apologizing like a normal human, my brain short-circuited and I proudly announced "SO EASY!" to my confused victim.