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I've barely lived my life and I'm around half way through. There's still too much for me to do and see. And people for me meet, my people now that I've got a better handle on who I am.

And not even all big cliché things like travel and love and financial stability and shit. But there's also still music to listen to, movies and series to watch, games to play, books and comics to read.

Also, as a Sonic the Hedgehog child and Philip K. Dick and punk rock teen, days like these light a fire in me. It's probably morbid but it kinda feels like I was born for days like these, which gives a sense of purpose and darker reason to exist.

Spite

Habit

Store-brand iced coffee and lofi girl

Family.

Oh, "go" is my default state. It's stopping me that's a challenge.

Gonna die eventually anyway, so might as well make the most of the time I have.

Music and drugs mostly, along with the hokey knowledge we are all star stuff and we are the universe experiencing itself.

Hatred and confusion.

Family and hobbies

I'm too much of a coward to kill myself and do the world a favor and despite wishes haven't yet dropped dead.

https://www.beyondallreason.info/ <-- robots blowing each other up in huge battles

Taking care of my cats and still existing to spite all the evil that would rather have me dead.

Taking care of my cat and doing my best to avoid the news channel.

I trained my brain to be a happier person that brings joy to others so i get positivity back
But today horrors within my comprehension kept invading my daydreams so i listened to some happy music (for me thats mostly "jumpy" 16? bit music and absolutly no voice) to change my mindset to return to happy

But i wont claim i have some harsh life as i am a white european in europe with no need to check my balance before getting groceries
I just have selfmade? anxiety :'D

Stubbornness

The worst people in the world right now are older than I am so if I keep going I will get to live to see the day they die. Sure, I won't be around 100 years from now to see cryogenics fail and some janitor scraping elon muck out of a cryopod but I do wake up every day hopeful that one of them made their last headline.

Lack of alternatives.

My family. Without me getting up, putting myself through each day, they would have a much tougher situation.

Obligation, mostly

My pets, friends, and family

YOU HAVE BEEN CHOSEN BY RA TO SPREAD THE GLORY OF THE SUN IN THE DARKNESS

There’s still stuff I enjoy doing, like seeing new places and cuddling my wife and dog. And there are too many people who would be happy to see me dead, and I refuse to give them the satisfaction

I focus on my own life, my dad, my other family and friends, work, volunteering. Lifting weights and exercising, gardening, cooking, playing games, watching sports.

A big part of it is having goals to work toward. Losing weight, learning new recipes, learning to be a better gardener. Cleaning up the house, making household repairs, and fixing up some electronics.

I don't want my parents to find my body, that's pretty much it