If you've ever had long hair, and lived in a place with hard water, you would not be asking this question.
this post was submitted on 06 Nov 2025
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Winning hypothetical arguments
Spotted a fellow neurospicy
ENJOYING A RARE MOMENT OF FEELING GOOD.
I got a heat pump water heater damnit, let me enjoy the fruits of its efficient labor.
Basking in the hot water
Disassociate
What are YOU not doing? Ain't no way you're washing yourself good in less than 10 min. Get outta here.
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Nothing bad can happen in the shower. It is the safest liminal space imaginable, and its pleasant to just be there. Im gonna linger for as long as i can
Warm water feel good
Getting away from all you people that question why I take long showers of course.
What, is it a fucking race?
A couple minutes while the water heats up to undress and brush tangles outta my hair.
A couple minutes to rub in shampoo, massage into the scalp, and rinse.
A couple minutes to rub in conditioner, brush it through my hair, massage into the scalp, and rinse.
A couple minutes to scrub my body with soap and rinse.
A couple minutes to enjoy the warmth of the water and make sure everything is fully rinsed off.
A couple minutes to rinse stray hairs and soap suds off the shower walls.
A couple minutes to dry off, maybe 4 or 5 if I really wanna get my hair dry.
A couple minutes re-brushing the tangles outta my hair.
A couple minutes putting oil in my beard/hair, then coming/styling my beard/mustache.
A couple minutes brushing my teeth.
A couple minutes putting clothes on.
At minimum it's a 22-minute affair, but let's round up to 30 because it's the first thing in the morning and I'm not moving as fast as I could be yet. What's the problem with any of the stuff on that list? What am I doing that's too slow for the 10-minute showerers (whom I never question for taking 10 minute showers, btw)?
rub
scrub
Exactly. Of course I can make myself wet slather some soap on my body. That's not washing, though. Washing means to scrub until squeaky clean. I have observed people go in the shower stinky and come out only slightly stinky. Why?
Then there's things like remove hard skin from the feet, cut nails, shave.
Use a fascial scrub on the face.
After the shower applying facial cream and body lotion also takes a little time.
Finally: collect hair from drain, dry off water that sploshed around
Waterfall meditation
It takes me 2 minutes to brush my teeth. Nearly 6 to floss.
I am not ashamed that it takes me 10 minutes to scrub, 5 minutes to shampoo, 5 minutes to condition, 5 minutes to face-shave, 10 minutes to rinse, and a few more minutes for using the artificial pumice stone.
how often are you shampooing for a full 5 minutes??
I don't wear my watch in the shower, but given my hair length, comparing intuitively to the length of time it takes to floss (which was timed), probably most times. Though, rarely I will do a quick shower and not shampoo (or condition) my hair.
Why do I take long showers? Because I know in the future, I won't be able to due to the water wars. And whether I, personally, take long showers or not will neither hasten, or slow, that timeline.
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Takes some time to wash the silt of the times, from my soul.
Also, the whole fast pace / no rest / ultra productive mindset has been around for eons, basically the rich don't believe the poors are entitled to any rest, relaxation or even just taking time with things, because that takes away from the money you're making them, so therefore you'll see that sentiment, seeded into culture, consistently, (I can't for the life of me think of the current buzz words this early in the morning, and sans coffee). There's always new buzzwords for it. Read any "I can do this faster than you" as them, the bourgeois, ordering you back to work.
While I'm in there I see visions of stories that don't exist.
Usually I just sit down. Let the water hit my head, and think. I process all of my thoughts in a soothing environment where I can sort them out and solve problems I've been struggling with.
Contemplating the nature of reality. The history of every molecule of water that's running over me. The future of them. The vast similarities and differences. Masturbating lazily without reaching conclusion because that mysterious and wonderful element is not a lubricant.
It takes longer than 10 minutes just to dry my hair properly
Relaxing. Nobody can bother you in the shower and it's a legit excuse to anyone. It's just so nice feeling that hot water
Same vibe:
People who go on beach vacation for a week, what are you doing there? I can undress, have a swim, get sand into my crotch and a sunburn on my shoulder in less than an hour. WHAT ARE YOU DOING
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I call it my "liquid blanket"
Once had a housemate who would take two hour-long showers every single day. I have no idea what he was going in there, but he was either shaving or wanking in there.
Did you make him pay twice as much as everybody else for the water bill? Also, super wasteful...
I recon I could flog one out, clean, and shave my legs in under 20 mins NGL
No excuses
Ruminating
I have contamination based OCD, and the resulting routine takes a while.
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