this post was submitted on 01 Nov 2025
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[–] erusuoyera@sh.itjust.works 68 points 3 days ago (4 children)

"Monster Mash"

I was working in the lab, late one night When my eyes beheld an eerie sight For my monster from his slab, began to rise And suddenly to my surprise

He did the mash, he did the monster mash The monster mash, it was a graveyard smash He did the mash, it caught on in a flash He did the mash, he did the monster mash

From my laboratory in the castle east To the master bedroom where the vampires feast The ghouls all came from their humble abodes To get a jolt from my electrodes

They did the mash, they did the monster mash The monster mash, it was a graveyard smash They did the mash, it caught on in a flash They did the mash, they did the monster mash

The zombies were having fun The party had just begun The guests included Wolfman Dracula, and his son

The scene was rockin', all were digging the sounds Igor on chains, backed by his baying hounds The coffin-bangers were about to arrive With their vocal group, 'The Crypt-Kicker Five'

They played the mash, they played the monster mash The monster mash, it was a graveyard smash They played the mash, it caught on in a flash They played the mash, they played the monster mash

Out from his coffin, Drac's voice did ring Seems he was troubled by just one thing Opened the lid and shook his fist and said "Whatever happened to my Transylvania Twist?"

It's now the mash, it's now the monster mash The monster mash, and it's a graveyard smash It's now the mash, it caught on in a flash It's now the mash, it's now the monster mash

Now everything's cool, Drac's a part of the band And my Monster Mash is the hit of the land For you, the living, this mash was meant too When you get to my door, tell them Boris sent you

Then you can mash, then you can monster mash The monster mash, and do my graveyard smash Then you can mash, you will catch on in a flash Then you can mash, then you can monster mash

Wah-ooh, argh, monster mash, wah-ooh Easy, Igor, you impetuous young boy Argh, mash good, mm, argh Monster mash, wah-ooh, monster mash, wah-ooh

[–] gigastasio@sh.itjust.works 46 points 3 days ago (2 children)

Well now I’m going to need more details on this Transylvania Twist.

[–] elvith@feddit.org 59 points 3 days ago

Probably something something something this?

[–] otter@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 2 days ago

IIRC, it's the bottom's tilt-shimmy with rhythmic grip on the top's petrified wood during doggy anal —originally called the Transylvanal Twist

I've decided that" the monster mash" is furiously masturbating like you're on a commuter train and someone pulled out a picture of some sexy ankle.

The way everyone starts mashing their monsters like there's an epidemic of mashed monsters just makes sense.

[–] Grandwolf319@sh.itjust.works 19 points 3 days ago

Didn’t think it was sexual until the end, now I’m like 80% sure

[–] starman2112@sh.itjust.works 8 points 3 days ago

Igor getting freaky with the chains and pet play

[–] 4_degrees@lemmy.world 43 points 3 days ago (3 children)

Leo Carpazzi's original lyrics: [Verse 1] I was working in the lab, late one night When my eyes beheld an eerie sight For my monster from his slab began to rise And suddenly, to my surprise His trousers dropped right to the floor With his bottom bare, he ran to the door I said, “Frankenstein, what’s gotten into you?” He said “My dick is hard, and I need to screw!”

[Chorus] (He did the fuck) He did the monster fuck (The monster fuck) It was a graveyard fuck (He did the fuck) That monster sucked and fucked (He did the fuck) He did the monster fuck [Verse 2] From my laboratory, I heard quite the racket Deep in the castle, the vampires jacked it The zombies all fucked in the graveyard grass Wolfman wolfed down Frankenstein’s ass

[Chorus] (They did the fuck) They did the monster fuck (The monster fuck) It was a graveyard fuck (They did the fuck) Those monsters sucked and they fucked (They did the fuck) They did the monster fuck

[Verse 3] Oh, the beasts all fucked as the orgy spread Bigfoot gave the Headless Horseman head Swamp Thing jerked off in the castle moat While Dracula gagged from the jizz in his throat The fucking was wet. There was spooge like mad Igor decided to fuck his own dad The Mummy let out a horny moan When Medusa’s bare tits turned his dick stone

[Chorus] (They did the fuck) They did the monster fuck (The monster fuck) It was a graveyard fuck (They did the fuck) Those monsters sucked and fucked (They did the fuck) They did the monster fuck [Verse 4] Oh, but Frankenstein’s bride was the biggest slut Dracula got balls deep in her butt She got titty-fucked by a giant spider Jizz made the streaks in her hair much whiter She fucked every monster; come one, come all Her three holes were filled like a bowling ball And while monsters all fucked his undead bride Frankenstein just jacked off and cried

[Chorus] (Now you should fuck) Now you should monster fuck (The monster fuck) And do the graveyard fuck (The monster fuck) Those monsters sucked and fucked (Now you should fuck) Now you should monster fuck

[Outro] One more time (Now you should fuck) Now you should monster fuck (The monster fuck) And do the graveyard fuck (The monster fuck) Those monsters sucked and they fucked (Now you should fuck) Now you should monster fuck (The monster fuck) Monster Fuck

[–] calamitycastle@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago* (last edited 3 days ago) (1 children)

When Medusa's bare tits turned his dick to stone

Greatest thing Wiger will ever produce

[–] 4_degrees@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago

It's why he needs to share it as often as possible, with the most contrived excuses to keep it going. Love it

[–] thejoker954@lemmy.world 11 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I recently listened to one of the comedy bang bang best ofs with this. I love it lol.

[–] 4_degrees@lemmy.world 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I love how long they have run that joke

[–] onlyhalfminotaur@lemmy.world 6 points 3 days ago

He's done it at least 10 times by my count.

[–] RattlerSix@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

I love hearing the completely new version of this song every year

[–] neatchee@piefed.social 14 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Hmmm. If that's true then maybe "Big Balls" by AC/DC wasn't about fancy parties 🤔🤔🤔

wasn't that one made for Last Action Hero?

[–] burgermeister@sh.itjust.works 22 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] Zachariah@lemmy.world 19 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I am reading it as scenes from an episode of this show:

[–] Lvdwsn@lemmy.world 16 points 3 days ago

Came to the comments hoping that people would be quoting Leo Carpazzi/CBB and was not disappointed. Love y’all

[–] mydoomlessaccount 2 points 2 days ago

..Dracula AND his son?

[–] AdolfSchmitler@lemmy.world 18 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Please check out the song "Monster Fuck". It is describes an orgy set to the monster mash lol

[–] proper@lemmy.world 9 points 3 days ago

It was a monster fuck part 2: spooky orgy!

[–] makeshiftreaper@lemmy.world 17 points 3 days ago

Well the original version was a little more on the nose about it

[–] Fontasia@feddit.nl 3 points 2 days ago (1 children)

It's the Skully Gully I'm most concerned about

[–] Iheartcheese@lemmy.world 1 points 2 days ago

They really liked Halloween

[–] 1985MustangCobra@lemmy.ca 1 points 2 days ago

thats nice.

[–] Raiderkev@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago

Time for a graveyard smash

[–] Blue_Morpho@lemmy.world 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

"the coffin-bangers were about to arrive"

[–] stevedice@sh.itjust.works 4 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

"the ghouls all came from their humble abodes to get a jolt from my electrodes"