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my horny bard played spoons but go off

My first character was a half elf, arcane trickster, rogue that was deathly afraid of spiders. My dm was fun enough to work it into the campaign and had us go up against a giant spider hoard

Make D&D great again

What's missing is the Mud Wizard.

One of my characters I hope to play some day is a half orc hexblade warlock who doesn't realize he has magic powers or that he made a pact. His "casting" involves yelling intimidatingly and waving his arms, sometimes throwing certain things.

If anyone asks where he got his favorite axe (which is always conveniently "on his back" when he needs it, despite him constantly forgetting it), he'll explain that he traded part of his shoe for it.

Any party members that try to explain his pact are met with disbelief or confused facial expressions before he inevitably moves on.

The bard is a hick who wears overalls, is named Beauregard ("Beau" to his friends), and charms the underpants off of various people and creatures of all kinds with his unassuming and innocent, natural "aw shucks" charm.

Secretly, he's a perv from a big city putting on an act.

Yo why this post out here hating on my boi 035?